So this girl has a boyfriend who goes to college out of state. The girl and I go to college in Texas and we got extremely close. She reached out to me and said she like me, and I told her I felt the same way. After two months of spending a great amount of time together we decided to be friends with benefits. So a week ago we had sex and everything was great, I thought I had an easy friend with benefit. Yet this past week she has been spending a great amount of time with a teammate of mine and I'm so confused. Anytime we're alone she flirts with me and makes a lot of sexual jokes and gestures. Yet when we're around the other guy she gives me the cold shoulder which is extremely confusing. I wouldn't say she completely ignores me but it's pretty close. Also anytime I mention she spend the night or come to my room to do something she declines and gives a bogus excuse. After giving the whole situation a great amount of thought I realized something. Her boyfriend is the classic douche bag, I'm the secret excitement, and the other guy is the clingy good guy which means she has the perfect trifecta. I just feel like we're all puppets of her master scheme. Once I realized this I cut off all communication with her and I didn't acknowledge her anywhere. She came over to my room after a couple days of that and asked my why I was acting so different. Then I told her that if she was going to act brand new around me at times then I wasn't going to put up with it. So if you could all enlighten me on how to regain her focus and make her forget about the other guy, and also if I am getting led on. I'm just confused by her unpredictable behavior. Any advice or wisdom would be much appreciated. Please be blunt as hell if you feel the need to be! Thanks!

Maybe she's giving you the cold shoulder around this "other guy" because she doesn't want him to know she's having sex with you. After all, she has a boyfriend. Also, if she's also having sex with the "other guy", then she's not going to be overtly sexual towards you when all three of you are together.

Either way, you have the assess the situation and see what you want out of her. If it's to just continue to be friends with benefits, sit down with her and make sure you make your intentions clear.

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yeah, you don't need to be emotionally affected by it. Let her do whatever she wants. let her be discrete if she wants.

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