How to deal with orbiter beta males



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PostPosted: Sun Oct 13, 2013 11:45 pm 
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There’s a good looking girl at work who I’m moving towards. The specifics of the situation- I got her phone number not too long ago (but for various reasons I haven’t texted her anything and prefer to do my work in person with her), we both have a same favorite area in town, said we would go out to it one day, this past weekend she was busy but with an excuse and she did seem genuine about wanting to do it another time. I only see her face to face occasionally, and she’s separated from me professionally, which is good in terms of workplace sarging.

The last time I had approached her when circumstances gave an opportunity I noticed at the last second she was accompanied by an orbiter male friend I had seen her with a lot. I didn’t want to seem afraid to chat her up in his presence, so I continued with talking to her. A bit later I shook the guy’s hand and introduced myself, but I didn’t stay too long, which was also dictated by the logistics of the moment.

What’s the proper way to handle this situation? In general should you just ignore the orbiter’s existence and be a bit of a dick to him? I know in a club setting the correct behavior is to open and talk to everybody in a group and generally win everybody over when possible, but things would seem to be a bit different here. Should I just go ahead and openly flirt and push things forward with her right in front of him, or wait and do it another time when I catch her alone? As I mentioned I’m also cognizant of not wanting to seem afraid of pursuing what I want just because he’s there.

I’m not as worried about this specific girl as I am about knowing in general how to handle this sort of situation for the future.


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PostPosted: Mon Oct 14, 2013 2:30 am 
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I myself deal with this a lot. I am interested in a girl but she always has this guy who secretly want to date/sex from her. I think you should be friend the orbiter males. I read somewhere that an alpha male is a leader of men and these betas need an alpha which could be you.


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PostPosted: Mon Oct 14, 2013 11:30 am 
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If you're good at rapid escalation then all you need is a few minutes of isolation to k-close and get her mind totally focused on you, done right she will find ways to have time with you alone.

If you're REALLY good you can rapid escalate just while he has his back turned. One of the times I had this issue I waited until orbiter wasn't watching, stood behind girl. whispered something sexy in her ear and gave it a light nibble, she lent back into me a lughtly grinded, took all of 5 seconds, orbiter was never an issue after that.

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PostPosted: Mon Oct 14, 2013 3:30 pm 
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I always grab one of my girls (female wing, random from the bar, girl I run into that I already know, etc ) to go flirt with them so I can swoop in.

If I don't have this option, I generally just ignore them and treat them like I would if they were a fat chick.


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PostPosted: Mon Oct 14, 2013 4:27 pm 
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Just be casual, he won't hurt if you know how to play your game well.
Gain him as a friend, because if you ignore him he'll start trying his best to push her away from you. You don't want a war with any type of person. It'll start appearing as if the both of you are fighting over her too, which isn't that much pleasant to her.

Just treat him as a friend and game her at the same time.


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PostPosted: Mon Oct 14, 2013 7:43 pm 
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Always be friends with them. If you try to be a dick, then they have the right to be dicks back to you, or if the girl are really good friends with them, she will come to their aid for you stirring flame. I have had situations like this, and they would usually even just hand the girl over to me if I'm just a value-giver.

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PostPosted: Mon Oct 14, 2013 8:29 pm 
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Ya'll must deal with different types than I do. 90% of the time its some guy that is in love with the girl but she has him friendzoned. Those types will literally drag the girl out of the bar if you can't distract them. That's why I always introduce them to one of my girls. Then we can all go back to my place. Time for drinking games. Then I'll get him so belligerent drunk that I can take his chick to my room while he is inebriated.


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PostPosted: Mon Oct 14, 2013 11:09 pm 
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I have to agree more with Natty here- in my experience the guy is most often interested in the girl and he won't want to see her go with you. I don't roll with other chicks so I can't follow that suggestion, but I can see how that could be effective.

As Gabriel mentions though, giving people value is always important.

My guess is that it's good to be friendly to the guy, but not show him too much importance in front of the girl.


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PostPosted: Tue Oct 15, 2013 3:41 am 
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Yeah, I very rarely go out with less than a mix of 6-7 folks. At a minimum, I generally know a few folks that will be there.

It comes in handy whether its an orbiter or another couple chicks. If you can figure out which girl is then decision maker, and talk her into after partying, the others always just follow suite.


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PostPosted: Tue Oct 15, 2013 4:13 am 
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Damn, that's a good mother hen strategy. Once you've bounced your target, her friends, mother hen and all, the target should be easy pickings for you. I actually did this one time unwittingly and it worked well.

In this case here though I was wondering about a girl in a workplace environment.


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PostPosted: Tue Oct 15, 2013 4:19 am 
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The only advice I have to give is dont get your meat where you get your bread.


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