Met this girl over a month and a half ago and she has been texting me first almost everyday... She was really into me, we live about an hour apart so we didn't see eachother much but after a week or so of texting we went out on a first date and it ended very well, ended up k-closing... We then went on a second date last week (we have been texting the whole time up until) and it ended up well i think, ended up making out in her car, probably could have escalated more and f-closed but i didnt... but we had a good time and me and this girl really connect...

Anyway, she texts me the next day (sunday) and everything seems good... I even pushed to go out Tuesday and she said to let her know the details but she was free...
The following day (Monday) I text her back and I get a reply hours later (she was working) and we ended up only exchanging a couple texts and nothing was set on Tuesday... Tuesday neither of us texted eachother... So I text her wednesday and she doesn't reply till i send her a second text hours later (i know i messed up here but she has done that to me a lot so i caved)... She ends up replying (saying she was really busy and tired) and we talk for a bit then I ignore her last text and went to bed... Thursday I send her a text just before bed, no reply... Friday I send her another text, no reply...

Now I'm fuckked and I look needy... Is this a loss cause? This one hurting me bad, I wasn't really into her at first but she texted me everyday and now I miss it and worried i'll lose her...

Is she just upset I ignored her text or do you think she could really lose interest that quick?? appreciate any advice....

Unfortunately girls can lose interest quickly. It's just the nature of the game. This is a valuable lesson that you learned here. You sought validation from her attention. You sought that feel good feeling from her. The problem with that as you by now know is that you cannot count on her attention, on her interest 100%, therefore you will always be in limbo (does she like me, does she not? If she does, great, if she doesn't I feel bad and I messed up). If you seek that feel good feeling from her your emotions will be doing rollercoasters, and it will even possibly drive her away (as you did here since you texted more in the end in fear of losing her).

You probably know now what you learnt from this. Do not seek that feel good feeling from her, but seek it from within yourself. Put your attention back onto yourself and your own awesomeness and ignore whatever the fuck she thinks of you. Once you start to seek validation from her and are outcome dependent, you will do things you wouldn't usually do.

Basically it's like this. Girls are interested in the you, the real you. What is the real you? Remember a time when you were single and you had no crush on anyone, and you just felt awesome. Maybe you felt free, you did things, were in a positive mood. This is the you girls like, girls are attracted to. You are free of any outcome (maybe even because you thought you couldn't get any) and therefore girls were attracted. Here suddenly you are outcome dependent. You worry about whether she likes you or not and therefore do things you wouldn't usually do, especially if you were in that awesome free state. She can notice this. Girls sniff it. A change in behavior, a behavior that isn't what she knew you to be, this is incongruence. This is what girls do not like. They do not like it because you are not who you said to were. Who you showed you were. You could've been this awesome dude that she really began to like, and suddenly this awesome dude is texting her all the time. Would an awesome dude really do that? Or would he have other things, more important things to take care of? He would definitely have more important things to take care of. But if he suddenly starts texting her it shows her he values her more than his own personal life. Suddenly he is drawing state from HER rather than from within HIMSELF and his own lifestyle. This is weak behavior that is associated with beta males, males who cannot control their own life, who cannot find happiness by themselves and are DEPENDENT on other people. This type of behavior is what a lot of women have when they are in "love" and therefore is a feminine trait. That's good and all, but it really isn't helping your chances with women, since most women want an emotionally strong man so that they can bounce off him. So if you change from one to the other, the incongruence and behavior itself is very unattractive, and therefore she loses interest.

She may also have lost interest for some other reason. Maybe there's another guy, maybe something happened, maybe she has buyer's remorse, maybe she didn't trust you enough, maybe she wasn't comfortable enough...the lesson here is you will NEVER KNOW 100% what made her behave in such a way. Therefore thinking about this stuff is a COMPLETE waste of time.

The best thing you can do here, as difficult as it may seem, is get your mind off her and do something else. Go sarge, go meet other girls, go out with friends, etc. to get yourself "clean" again. Get yourself free again. Then reinitiate with her if you still want to.

Good luck man.

Thank you, this post means a lot... I agree 100%, when she showed a ton of interest in me I began to change and was acting 'different' for sure... I felt like I had her on lock the way she was all into me (felt like we were in a relationship), I'm just really shocked she would pull a 180 out of no where like that. Not even a text to let me know the deal... And there must be another dude, she texted me 24/7 before; she loved the attention for sure so i'm sure she wouldnt stop texting me unless she was getting the attention elsewhere...

What is worse is because of this girl I stopped talking to other girls, some I recently tried to re-initiate with no luck... Looks like I gotta start all over now...

How long should I wait to reinitiate? I definitely want to at least try again but I don't want to look needy. I am not in a horrible position in terms of neediness at the moment.

I've been in this situation before mate it stings a bit. One piece of advice I can give you I don't think it'll be effective in this situation but for future reference. You're texting a girl she suddenly stops give it about a half hour then text her and say clearly this relationship is not working out we need a divorce I get the house money and cars you take the kids. I've used it 6 or 7 times with positive results everytime and flirty texts back in under a minute everytime. I know this doesn't really apply to this situation but could help if you find yourself in this situation again. Good luck

The funny thing is we always joked about getting married and having kids, etc... Do you think I should still drop that line or just stop texting for good?

I was actually thinking of using that line before and it'll go well with the last text i sent but i dont want to be too needy and keep pushing...

If you think it'll fit in and you wanna give it one last crack I'd say go for it. If she hasn't been replying to your texts that could spark her interest and get a reply. Its good because its in a way your presenting a bit of a challenge.

Ya I like that line, and I really think it'll fit... If this doesn't work I'll let go... I'll send it now and let you guys know... Thanks

the line WORKED, she replied fast... lmao

Right on mate! Sometimes all it takes is for you to present a challenge. Now that you're talking don't give into her be a challenge for her wait a few min between txts if she wants to meet up be busy put her off for a day or two put yourself above her. When you do go out take her on an adventure that makes her think wow. In short. Be the badboy that every women loves. Good luck mate!

Well I played it cool and even got it sexual/flirty and now she stopped replying...

She did say at first that "our lives are too fast paced for each other" when I said "clearly this relationship isn't workin out..." ... not sure what she meant??

But she did play along with the house/cars/kids/divorce thing for a few text messages and she was dying of laughter... She was responding right away while I took my time, i even turned it sexual and once i mentioned make up sex she said "too bad that'll never happen again" and never responded since... lol, lost cause? I was smooth still...

.

I think you jumped the gun by bringing up make up sex. I think your best to move on now. Being the smartass that I am when she said too bad thatll never happen I would reply oh well your loss but only if u haven't replied yet again your presenting a challenge. I wouldn't hold out for her now that u feel better about the situation move on and have fun. Hell go out tonight and make it your goal to have a threesome. You'll be surprised how fast u forget about her once u find another

I did reply with "Too bad for you though, make up sex is the shit"

I only jumped the gun because she was replying so well and playing along, we are both mad sarcastic too so I gave her a chance to jump on the "make up" part but I guess that is her rejection...

any idea on what she meant with "lmao it really isn't, our lives are too fast paced for each other"... seemed like the only part she was truthful about

and it will be hard to find another girl with her type of personality, she is really a lot like me and we did connect well, she even said this earlier when we were talking so that is why i am taking this hard

She has been in vaca for the week and gets back this weekend/monday... Should I wait mid week and give her a call?

Moved to general questions. Please follow and read the rules of the forum.

Peace and Love,

Vic

_________________
Just another guy from back in the day.

Blogging again living life: http://www.Scienceofnaturalgame.com

Massage/work the role play some more next time, most women are quite responsive to this as it leaves room the imagination to run wild whilst humouring yourselves at the same time. You had the right idea, the right text, timely placed can resurrect something that once felt dead. Feel free to make it a bit theatrical, or melodramatic (but not overly melodramatic) to stimulate the excitement of a real relationship.

As a poster already commented, be careful getting sexual too fast. Remember, women are used to guys revealing their horniness quickly, and if she's not looking for a romp in the hay with you she'll frame your behavior as sexually motivated and cast you in the "like every other guy I meet" bin - believe it or not, (and contrary to what 60yoc may say), getting sexual too quickly can blow you out fast. Remember, a confident guy doesn't NEED sex (he has many other potential females at his disposal for that, he's not needy for it), self-restraint is actually a VERY attractive thing to a woman.

Don't worry about what you did, the past is the past. You could continue with her and try and make a long-fuse (woman who is hardly responsive to you) become a short-fuse (she intiates you via text, laughs at all your jokes even the terrible ones, baits you to ask her out etc.). Worst case scenario she completely ignores you, who cares. This can be a great testing ground for you. Improve your text game and all other facets of your game. I've turned long fuses into short ones, its not as hard as you think. Lastly, remember to always end on a high note. The rush you get with her being responsive makes it hard to bail out on the convo, but that's where your self-restraint comes in. Think of it this way, there was a study done a few years ago on impulse-control and development. Elementary aged school children were given a cookie and told that if they refrained from eating the cookie for a determinant amount of time they were promised a whole bag of cookies. The teacher than left the room, leaving the children to their own device. The children who could not distract themselves from the cookie were unable to resist and ate the cookie set before them. The other children were able to distract themselves and resist temptation for the promise of a bigger payout (a whole bag of cookies). The children in the later group grew up to be more successful in life because they saw the larger picture, or able to stave-off short term temptation for long-term payout.

Keep that in mind. Do what you must to keep your impulses at bay and you will more likely succeed in all of your endeavors.