Evening all

Long time lurker and first time poster here, in fact just signed up to get some opinions, please please bear with me.

I have a general question and am interested to hear peoples opinions. Just a bit of a background as to why I am asking the question, will try and keep it short but retain some relevant detail.

Im not really that confident at approaching as a general rule and dont do it very often (im trying to work on that).


So I was out with a mate the other week bar we go to quite often, on the dance floor around midnight. This one girl really caught my eye. Cheeky grin, pretty/cute etc. I think she was looking at me but not 100% sure. I make my way over to her and her mate, and try to get a bit of interaction going, either I wasnt very good at it or they were just teasing so I just carry on dancing i the general area with my mate and in their area ish.

Around ten minutes later, her and her mate go to leave, I got the impression that one of their other friends wanted to leave so they went too. totally out of character I just thought to myself, "you really like the look of her just go and say something". So I did, pretty much by the doors, we had a great 15 or so minute interaction, this then continued outside for another 10minutes, long story short got to kissing, got a cab and then ended up at her place for the night. Happy days. Well until late the next morning when we had the fun tasking of trying to sneak out of her house without her parents or sister seeing me (she was giving me a lift back to my mates as I didnt really have an easy means of getting back).


Anyway, the question.

Do you think there are certain times when women are more open to being approached, and will be more obvious about whether they are interested or not? As on the dance floor they have options open and can make a bit of a game of it, but as it comes to the end of the night its more a plain yes or no.

Oh, and the annoying thing about the above incident is I dont remember one jot of what I said to her (apart from a breif conversation about her underwear), so its not as if I can try and use the same approach again.

Apologies if this is a silly question, but I am a novice in this kind of thing.

Are their times when women are more open to being approached? Yes.

But I want to clarify an important distinction a lot of people miss. In order of desirability, here are your options:

1) Approach at an opportune time (ie. She is bored, lull in conversation,she is by herself casually strolling in a park)

2) Approach at a time that is not ideal (In an intense conversation with her friends, In a bad mood etc)

3) Don't approach at all.

Obviously we want to maximise point 1# and minimise point 2# while all but wipe out point 3#.

You will however build up a lot of emotional resilience when you approach at less then ideal times. When you feel you have nothing more to gain by putting yourself in these tough situations focus on point #1.

Just remember that barriers that exist (or that you make up) are never truly an excuse to not approach.

Cheers, Jack.

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