Meeting ex gf after 6 months. Advice



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Thabo
PostPosted: Mon May 06, 2013 9:58 pm 
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I am meeting an ex gf with whom i have been on off with for a long t ime. she still loves me but doesnt rust me due to past issues. Last saw her 6 months ago whe she stayed at my place

We meeting to talk and she is very hesitant even to meet due to the trust thing. How do i play it so she goes away after reassured and back as my girl. We are meeting during the day and getting something to eat. Should i just be upfront and tell her i still got feeling for her or what?
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Jay (Majik)
PostPosted: Mon May 06, 2013 10:02 pm 
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I am meeting an ex gf with whom i have been on off with for a long t ime. she still loves me but doesnt rust me due to past issues. Last saw her 6 months ago whe she stayed at my place

We meeting to talk and she is very hesitant even to meet due to the trust thing. How do i play it so she goes away after reassured and back as my girl. We are meeting during the day and getting something to eat. Should i just be upfront and tell her i still got feeling for her or what?
No. Never tell them how you feel. Ever. That is the quickest way to hit the "ew" switch.

Remember, she is an ex for a reason.....
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Thabo
PostPosted: Mon May 06, 2013 10:10 pm 
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I am meeting an ex gf with whom i have been on off with for a long t ime. she still loves me but doesnt rust me due to past issues. Last saw her 6 months ago whe she stayed at my place

We meeting to talk and she is very hesitant even to meet due to the trust thing. How do i play it so she goes away after reassured and back as my girl. We are meeting during the day and getting something to eat. Should i just be upfront and tell her i still got feeling for her or what?
No. Never tell them how you feel. Ever. That is the quickest way to hit the "ew" switch.

Remember, she is an ex for a reason.....
I hear you but in this case she is an ex because of the wrongs i did and she found out

So how do i get her into gf mode without telling her how i feel
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Jay (Majik)
PostPosted: Mon May 06, 2013 10:14 pm 
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I am meeting an ex gf with whom i have been on off with for a long t ime. she still loves me but doesnt rust me due to past issues. Last saw her 6 months ago whe she stayed at my place

We meeting to talk and she is very hesitant even to meet due to the trust thing. How do i play it so she goes away after reassured and back as my girl. We are meeting during the day and getting something to eat. Should i just be upfront and tell her i still got feeling for her or what?
No. Never tell them how you feel. Ever. That is the quickest way to hit the "ew" switch.

Remember, she is an ex for a reason.....
I hear you but in this case she is an ex because of the wrongs i did and she found out

So how do i get her into gf mode without telling her how i feel
SHOW her how you have changed. Be normal. Act as if what ever happened in the past never happened at all. If she brings it up, change the subject.
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dvjackson
PostPosted: Tue May 07, 2013 1:24 am 
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Act as if what ever happened in the past never happened at all. If she brings it up, change the subject.
Not sure that's a good idea, dodging the issue entirely won't convey a lot of trustworthiness. she might get the impression that you're just trying to pretend the past never happened to get back with her.

Don't bring it up upfront but if she brings it up don't avoid the subject, acknowledge that you fucked up. but have a "what's done is done" attitude about it, don't bring your feelings into it, talk about it as if it was another person who did it.

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Jay (Majik)
PostPosted: Tue May 07, 2013 3:03 pm 
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Act as if what ever happened in the past never happened at all. If she brings it up, change the subject.

Don't bring it up upfront but if she brings it up don't avoid the subject,
That was what I meant lol you don't want to stay on the topic though and let her completely change the frame of the interaction. It is all about controlling your emotions. Act as if what happened was no big deal though. You don't need to drag it out and start apologizing. You did what you did. If it was still a big issue, she wouldn't be hanging out with you.
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