Hi guys

I'm not sure where to post this question. At first I thought it would be in "Relationships" but then I read the ban criteria. This question is not about my girlfriend. Its about a girl I met a few weeks ago.

Everything went right from the beginning and now that I have learned some of the techniques of PUAs I know why. I did perfect push and pull. So she was into me and I kissed her at the first evening when I met her in a club.

It went on like everythings perfect. She lives in another town about 200 miles away. I visited her, we had a lot of fun an sex and we both enjoyed it very much. I stayed four days and then a week later again for 5 days.

Now comes the part where I ruined it.

She was the one starting to talk about a relationship and I was like yeah why not let it come to us.
But she wanted to hear that we're together so I said we are. Then a few days later she said no where not together. ...few days later again she said she wants me to be the last man in her life... few days later she said again no we're not together.

The problem is now I was the one who wanted a relationship. Since the last visit I haven't seen her for a month because we both study or go to school.

I called her a few times and everything was cool when we talked but then she didnt answer the phone for a week. I was pretty upset and made a big mistake. One weekend I tried to call her about 20 or 30 times. From then on I couldn't even talk to her about that. We only exchanged a few text messages and I became kind of needy and started to beg for a conversation. It hurt me so I was a little pissed of and showed her that it freaked me out. She allways said "I'll call you" but for days she didn't and I couldn't wait for it. So I wrote again and again until the last time when she wrote:

"whats so hard to comprehend when I tell you I'll call you.
we're not even a couple and still its very stressful.
I don't know what you're complaining about again.
I'm not up for that anymore, sorry."

I said lets talk this over but she wouldn't talk to me like the whole time.
At last I got a ok we'll talk about it but not now... and so on


I know that I don't want a relationship with her anymore because she isn't capable of having one.(Even though she told me that she never wanted relationships but now that she met me that changed) She changes her mind like 5 times a day and that doesn't work out for me.

Now here comes the question:
I know that she had a "only sex" relationship before and the sex with her was simply the best I've ever had. And I don't say that because I didn't have much. So I really want to connect with her in that way again.

Can you please give me some advice how I approach her without being needy or pulling her too much?

I thought about sth. like "relationship with you doesn't work for me anyway but the sex was great and you liked it too (she really did... I guess women often lie about that but I believed her when she told it was the best she had... maybe cause she's younger and I have more experience whatever - normally I don't believe such things - I'm an idiot ). maybe we can keep that going with the both of us being free to do whatever we want and me not calling you anymore so I don't annoy you."

But that sounds a little odd to me and I thought you guys definitely know what to do... so please help me...

I don't know if it's better to wait. Or what to do at all like when I call her she doesn't answer. when I write her maybe she's annoyed... She still has a sweater of me and I have a top of her... maybe I can work with that... I want to remind her of the good times we had but I don't know how.

You're the Pro's with women... I trust that you can help me to fix that!

by the way thank you for reading the text ... it's a bit long

That's her begging for space. Leave her alone and move on. You won't get this one back easily. Your best bet is to concentrate on yourself and look around for other girls. Always keep your mind occupied. It won't be easy but you need to tell yourself you're done with her. Good luck.

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Before she can respect you, you need to respect yourself.

^^ totally agree.

Here's the breakdown. You started out great, but then you changed. She fell for the guy you were when you were gaming her, then all of a sudden when the prospect of "getting her as a girlfriend" came up, you caved and turned needy and annoying (sorry for the tough love). Her reaction was to question herself and decision to let you in. Ultimately she probably went with a different guy option she had available. (any girl worth gaming ALWAYS has multiple options - accept that fact).

From here, best advice is to freeze her out for a LONG time. Live life, date other girls, move on. Then if after 9 months to a year you still find yourself wondering, just send her a BREIF message to the effect of "hey, long time. We should catch up." and if she never responds LET IT GO.

Generally speaking, if I were you, I'd file this one under "ooops, lessons learned".

_________________
"Would it be wrong to join sexaholics anonymous to pick-up chicks?" "...yes, and stop eating that baby."

-Psych3r-

Your being a needy little girl! STOP THAT!

Neediness is a desperate need for affection.

The extreme need for affection that will cause a person to take someone else's spouse, sleep with the same sex, bang an HB6 or lower, or engage in excessive masturbation.

To be needy is a guy who needs attention no matter what the cost. A person that doesn't have much confidence and will bug the living shit out of some poor girl just for a little attention. They are always suspicious, aggravating and generally become an AFC.
Needy is desperate, plain and simple!
Seriously? Your joking right?
This is short for "Lose my number, it's getting creepy!"

Followed by "Wake up pal, I'm banging other dudes! It's hard to answer the phone with a dick in my mouth!"

Tough to hear I know, but you need to move the fuck on! there are plenty more.

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They call me the cat whisperer, cause I know exactly what the pussy needs.

I allready told myself that I'm done with her. And I have started to hit other girls, too. But it won't make her jellous cause she won't know about it (she lives 200 miles away).

I know its a tough one but maybe you can give me a tip on how to approach her maybe in a few weeks or so.
I mean if we could have a sexual relationship I won't take her space away so she should be fine with that. But how do I tell her without sounding weak?


you're all right and know I made a big mistake with that stupid needyness... I was single for a year before that... maybe that explains a bit... but I wasn't playing the "game" with her its just now that I got interested in it.

I know there's plenty other but I just never had a combination of a really hot girl and her being sexually this open. I can't give that sex up that easy ... I want more

Wait a sec, do you WANT to make her jealous? Why?

It's obvious that this chick isn't worth your time. Drop her. What you have is a case of oneitis and the cure is simple but hard. Go out and sarge some other girls. Period. Leave this girl alone.

I dont want to make her jellous I want more sex with her. It kind of sounded like you suggested me to make her jellous. But anyway you guys are all right I have and I can move on.

But still dont you have any trick or at least a good idea for a try that could maybe work this out for me?
I would really appreciate something that could help me with this except the plan that I should get other girls...
- what I'll do anyway. But my roommate could give me that advice.

I'm looking for a strategy to put me back in the place I allready was (the one that girl looked up to and wanted to be with). There must be a way...

LMAO, she got you. You got girl gamed.

Shake it off, before the meathooks tighten any further.

_________________
"Would it be wrong to join sexaholics anonymous to pick-up chicks?" "...yes, and stop eating that baby."

-Psych3r-

Your primary objective is not to get her back... That's a long shot. Your primary objective is to take care of your mental health first and foremost. We are telling you to go out and sarge, and pickup other girls because this will help you forget about her. It's not to make her jealous. Even if she saw you with other girls, she wouldn't necessarily become jealous.

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Before she can respect you, you need to respect yourself.