Hey guys,

There's this HB9. Gave me her name so I could add her on facebook. I added her. Now I wanna send a message and tell her I wanna go out.

She actually lives in another country, and I dont know if she's there now and when she'll come back.

So I was thinking:

"How bout we hang out some time ur in (insert city name)?"

Do you think that's good? It looks casual, simple and non-needy to me.

Open to suggestions.

Well this would actually be a very fragile situation I'd think so, So you'd have to go about it carefully. Being too willing to go to a city just for her would seem needy or even desperate. If anything I would plan a trip to an area near by and then invite her to tag along.

Also before asking her I would actually talk to her, figure out a few things about when she'd be available (Indirectly, don't just ask when she's available, maybe talk about work and how often you visit other places and let her catch into the conversation.)

Bring up the positive emotions she felt when she was with you, anything that would make her laugh, inside jokes, any nicknames you gave her or are relevant.

I wouldn't be too advancing towards someone who lives out of country, because you also have your own life too.

For one thing you need to know where she even is. If she's in Portugal right now and you're in Cuba, that makes for a wee bit of a logistics issue. I never ask a girl out more than two days in advance and rarely more than a single day.

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RSDTyler

Dudes, thanx for your help.

She and I are in the same city for now. Dunno when she leaves. In my message, I was (knowingly) assuming she already left the city. So I was askin to see her any time she comes back.

She sent me a message on facebook saying "Sounds good to me", and it had the location thing on, so I knew she's still in the same city as I am.

What to do next?

Be like "Hey, I was going to see if you wanted to grab a coffee with me, but I actually just heard about this new exhibit/show/event that's going on until Sunday. We should go there together this weekend instead. I think it'll be a lot of fun!"

I like that strategy because you are basically telling her you were going to do something lame, but now you want to do something much funner. And you also aren't asking her. There's no question mark there. You are telling her that she should come do this new fun thing with you. That's like ten times better than asking if she is available for coffee tomorrow.

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“Nothing is impossible, the word itself says 'I'm possible'!” ~Audrey Hepburn

Totally agree with this, try it out man

Best wishes ~ Matt

Why are you so obsessed with this one chick? Message her when she's actually in your city. Until then there are loads (literally loads) of other more accessible girls. THAT is truly non-needy.

Thanx a lot for the help guys, really.

And she IS in the city right now, so thats why I've asked her . But I acted like I didnt know it before.

Hope it works out. Thank you all. And if everything works good I'll come back here and tell you all about it and thank again .