Needless to say, I just had sex for the first time. I don't think it really belongs in the LR because there wasn't really anything to learn from. Anyway, the thing is that I didn't actually cum. I'm sure that's still considered sex, but mentally for me it wasn't.

So my question is: When do you find it appropriate to cum?
and: How long do you usually have sex for?

I had been going for about 8-10 minutes and just got soft and couldn't get it up again, and I think the real reason is because I was worried when I should come. Should I have just built it up and got off when I want, which would have been like 3 minutes.. lol. 3 minutes is probably too short? Damnit I don't know.

Well as long as she's having fun, make it last as long as possible. She won't complain of 30 minutes of hard dick in her. But you probably don't want to only last 3 minutes. If you feel you might cum after only 3 minutes, just slow it down. Worst case scenario, switch positions... Gives you a few seconds to recover.

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Before she can respect you, you need to respect yourself.

i've never had dysfunction down there but my timings change drastically with every girl. My ex girlfriend knew what to do to make me cum pretty much instantly, she knew it and loved that she could do it.

My most recent endeavour I didn't even cum and she was arguably more attractive and louder then my ex but yeah I didn't cum, got her to cum twice but no action from me.

I don't think there is an average time. TO be honest man you will find some girls don't even care about cumming they just enjoy making a man react in that way.

Being considered sexy/desired by the man they choose to have sex with is more important I think to them.