Hello all

I (and I'm fairly certain I'm not alone in this) have the problem that I tend to use two different mindsets for situations. For example, I'm terrified of talking to strangers in nightclubs, on the street, ... but I have no problem talking to strangers when I'm at work.

For example, at my previous employment I had no issues talking with ambassadors, high ranking officials, whatever. At my current employment I talk to around 100 people / day (regular employees, high ranking officials, you name it - men and women, HB8+ and others). But when I go out during the week or in the weekends, I'm suddenly terrified. Why? Being rejected, saying the wrong things, the usual AFC crap.

Now I was wondering, why does anyone have such different mindsets? Is there any way of implementing one mindset for every situation? Is there any way to keep the switch "on"?


Greetings,

Spinoisje

_________________
Alea Iacta Est
Scito Te Ipsum

"Oh the irony, having ads for porn sites/interbrides while browsing this site."

Here's my opinion and the way I look at approaching and approach anxiety. I just want to have fun. Having fun is for me, way more important than a good approach.

Having fun while speaking to random people will allow you to do things without giving you the chance to stop and think "hey, I wonder what they are thinking of me".

Just try and have some fun. For the beginning I would suggest you to use openers that doesn't allow people to reject you unless the people you talk to are douchebags right from the word go. For day game, use the Newbie Mission "hi" to everyone! My club game opener was always high 5's because most people respond positively towards it.

_________________
"Everything you do will be insignificant, but it is very important that you do it" - Gandhi

Tried the "Hi" mission on the way home. I smiled at people and made eyecontact, but I always forgot the "Hi"-part. *facepalm*

_________________
Alea Iacta Est
Scito Te Ipsum

"Oh the irony, having ads for porn sites/interbrides while browsing this site."

Okay try this. Give your friend a $100. You have to be honest when doing this. Now try out the "Hi" mission. Your friend may only give your money back after you have said "Hi" to at least 20 - 30 people you haven't met before. You can use money or anything else that someone can take away that you desperately need, and only giving it back once you've earned it. Should be good motivation.

_________________
"Everything you do will be insignificant, but it is very important that you do it" - Gandhi