I had been seeing a girl for a few weeks but failed to build enough attraction, mostly because I was a pussy and didn't want to make a risky move. We also never had sex, which was caused by resistance by her initially and then my lack of move after she told me about an abusive relationship she was in for a few years (and is clearly emotionally affected by). I got LJBF'ed about 5 days ago. I saw her once at a mutual friend gathering thing, mostly ignoring her and doing my own thing. We haven't talked or texted since then. My question is how do I act around her now? I will most likely see her a few more times at parties on campus as our friend group overlaps slightly. However, I doubt I'll see her more than once or twice every few weeks. Do I the t her for any reason? Or just look interested/hook up with other girls at the parties were at together, while mostly ignoring her?

You don't actively ignore someone, that means you do care. Instead you do your own things DO hookup with other girls. She will be interested in why these girls like you when she didn't. Eventually she will go with the flow and become passively interested. Use your social proof to generate attraction for you. DO still talk to her, you don't want to be seen as the guy who could not get laid and blow her off. Just have your most of your attention elsewhere.


P.S. stop being a pussy.


Mr. Assertive

That sounds like good advice. I think the inner-pussy came from me actually liking this girl and not wanting to fuck things up, which is ironically exactly what I did. If she was just another girl to fuck I wouldn't have given a shit at all. This girl definitely got into my head.

Another note; I was told a few days after the fact by a good friend of mine who knows her best friend that not ever fucking was a huge portion of it. After a few occasions of building myself up again in social situations, is an assertive "we're fucking tonight" type statement in order? If I see signs of attraction again should I go balls to the wall to make up for the beta bullshit from before?

Just be the happiest, funnest, coolest version of yourself you can be. You'll probably have to go on with your life without her anyway, so you might as well do it with flying colors. When you are around her, don't ignore her and also don't try to put some special game on her. Just treat her the same way you would any other girl. Forget that she ever LJBF'd you. Act like it didn't happen. Eventually she'll come around to you, perhaps after being battered around by another couple douchebags. Give it time and be your best self.

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“Nothing is impossible, the word itself says 'I'm possible'!” ~Audrey Hepburn