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 Post subject: Only real PUA please
PostPosted: Thu Oct 25, 2012 4:16 am 
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Hello there,

Background: This is the first time I ever post in the forum, even though I've been reading for quite a few months and I've done the basic reading every PUA should go through. I'm not particularly interested in having the best game there possibly could be, but I do like having game and being able to take a girl out to dinner when I am genually interested in her and going from there. I don't usually have problems unless I straight out crash and burn, which does happen on occasion, but I've been completely confused on this situation and would like some advice.

I just moved to CA and started at a new college junior level transfer. Met this girl in my english class one day we do a paper peer editing. We get along great, she gives me many indications of interest (age, why I moved, who I live with, what classes) without me ever even giving her my name or asking for hers. She offered to give me her e-mail so she can send me her paper later on. Few days later we exchanged a few emails regarding the paper that were flirty. A week passes by and after class I offer her a ride home and she accepts, when I drop her off, I ask her to dinner and this is where is gets tricky. She said yes and gave me her number, made me call her so she would have mine. Class would be cancelled for the next week and a half so I wouldn't see her otherwise. This was on a Tuesday. On Thursday I call, and no answer, leave a text "Hey ___, this is Machiavillain. Hope you enjoyed your day off! Give me a call back when you're avaliable" No reply so I called again on Sunday. No answer. Went back to class and she started the conversation the second she saw me. "Hey did you finsih the book? Did you like it? What'd you think of it" since we had to read a whole book we had time to talk about it at the beggining of class, she sat next to me and talked the whole time, still asking questions. Throughout this whole time, I did not bring up once anything about the week off, or the why she didn't pick up. Class ends and before she leaves she comes up to me while I'm still at the desk and says "I'll see you thursday!"

Maybe I made a mistake by giving in and offering her a ride home? Cat String?

Okay well...

I understand that me offering a ride can be bad, which is why I am second guessing myself now after the fact (perhaps 20 20 hindsight). But at the same time this is a college situation. From what I've noticed not many have the priviledge to have a car during these years. She did mention she was going to take the bus home, which is why I offered the ride. At the same time, she's allowing me to see where she lives so I actually viewed these as good. I do realize that ME ASKING for the ride might have been hindering, but what came after may not be the case.

When I gave her a ride home we played the question game and one of the questions was about the relationship status. She's single.

I absolutely agree that college girls are probably the most confusing. But I also understand that in college we have countless opportunities with different people. We ourselve may have done this... The point is: they are indecisive and appear confusing because of all the options they have. If this is the case, a PUA must be the one with the best game to make her decission easy.

Unless I'm understanding this all wrong...

So what's the next move? and more importantly, what went through her head?


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PostPosted: Thu Oct 25, 2012 5:11 am 
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I reckon she probably thought your dinner I idea was totally lame. This is college man most chicks are out there looking to party, get drunk and fuck heaps of guys.

Next time you see her, escalate, isolate, F-close, all in the same day. FUCK HER!!!

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PostPosted: Thu Oct 25, 2012 5:50 am 
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You have to understand that a girl will be on a different emotional level different from your interaction.

So she's totally into you etc... but lets say you wait a few days. Her mood is different from before, she's hung over, or tired, or sleepy. Etc...

Don't over complicate these things.

She talked to you in class which is good. However you framed your hangout as a romantic date, as opposed to a fun interaction with a male and a female.

Nobody wants dinner dates unless it's at your place and you're both cooking. And agreed with above poster, fuck her in the same day.

Do something fun and casual


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PostPosted: Thu Oct 25, 2012 6:42 pm 
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machiavillain,

i'm glad you picked up the stuff I said on your previous post. I too am facing the EXACT problem. I can share with you what I did wrong and where I am in now.

1) I kept sending her back (free rides) - hence she relied on me on 2 days of the week to drop her off. Each time, we have little lunch "dates". Short meetings like these are great for conversations, kino escalations. I would advice NOT to give the rides unless it is along the way or you are willing to do it. - Make sure she comes to you after class "hinting" about it. This allows you to neg her and really befriend her. (not a PUA method though).

-You have 1 great advantage from me. Is that she is SINGLE. This means there is no boyfriend or other people she is seeing( however consider she might be also dating others or other guys are hitting on her too - so, move faster. )

-Don't see the ride as a bad thing, as I feel it gives you DHV. Also did you act chivalrous? Open the door for her, let her sit. Do these things naturally and she would see that you are an alpha. There are many in-car tricks to escalate kino. Break hard on some lights - stretch your hand out over her, and say you alright? (these are little things that excites them)

2) Stop trying to mind read her. It will exhaust you. I tried it, and just totally got frustrated, as the signals were always mixed. Its as though they are very moody - one point they are flirty another they are totally shut off. This girl I'm still trying with shuts off when I bring school topics up - so, learn from me, idea of you is to make her relaxed, out of school context and really be the guy who is fun and mysterious.

3) Next step? I really hope you took my advice and ESCALATE kino. Have you hugged her? Hugging is should be done at least on the 2nd day or 3rd. This sends out a message you are into her - also it makes her comfortable with your scent, touch and presence.

So, more importantly is NOT what went through her head is what can you do to project your interest in a confident and PUA way. Also, do not limit yourself to just her, game other girls. She maybe a HB10 to you, but there are others who are far more willing, and did i mention ALOT more girls out there?

Tip: I always use my surrounding as a pickup line in university. If i was near the science building, ill go up to her say hey are you in XX class at XX building there? If she says yes - then boom - conversation right there. How to make yourself clear from it is that oh it must be a different XX class - most higher level courses are usually in the same building, so DHV (provided you know some information about the course). If they say no, then again, you can strike something different like you seem more like a XX major. Always end fast too, I have to rush to my next class.... and #close if you can.

Problem I am in : I might have fallen into the friendzone for not acting fast enough. Also she has me by the balls with "I have a boyfriend - who is not serious, but its been 2 month". Read my thread and you will see a common advice - is to ACT.

mixed-signals-or-am-i-being-used-vt1483 ... highlight=

Right now, we are getting alot closer. Hugging and contact comes naturally. I will go in for the kiss soon. I have to remind myself that, I HAVE NOTHING TO LOSE. Only I can put myself in the friendzone.


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 Post subject: Re: Only real PUA please
PostPosted: Thu Oct 25, 2012 7:14 pm 
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Quote:
Hello there,

Background: This is the first time I ever post in the forum, even though I've been reading for quite a few months and I've done the basic reading every PUA should go through. I'm not particularly interested in having the best game there possibly could be, but I do like having game and being able to take a girl out to dinner when I am genually interested in her and going from there. I don't usually have problems unless I straight out crash and burn, which does happen on occasion, but I've been completely confused on this situation and would like some advice.

I just moved to CA and started at a new college junior level transfer. Met this girl in my english class one day we do a paper peer editing. We get along great, she gives me many indications of interest (age, why I moved, who I live with, what classes) without me ever even giving her my name or asking for hers. She offered to give me her e-mail so she can send me her paper later on.

Good.

Few days later we exchanged a few emails regarding the paper that were flirty. A week passes by and after class I offer her a ride home and she accepts, when I drop her off, I ask her to dinner and this is where is gets tricky. She said yes and gave me her number, made me call her so she would have mine. Class would be cancelled for the next week and a half so I wouldn't see her otherwise. This was on a Tuesday.

Good.

On Thursday I call, and no answer, leave a text "Hey ___, this is Machiavillain. Hope you enjoyed your day off! Give me a call back when you're avaliable" No reply so I called again on Sunday.

A phone call and text messaging indicating she call you back, which can be easily rationalized by her as 2 "No's". Engage her with light humor via text before going immediately into a phone call, particularly if there's been a few days in between your last communication. Why? It reestablishes rapport, it is also a good way to build some attraction but more importantly establishing greater levels of comfort as texting is low obligation/commitment for her (less anxiety inducing than a phone call), and will soften her up, if done properly, for a phone conversation and meet-up. You can initiate a role play with her via text, or even use some 'callback' humor (referencing something you both share/experience to get the ball rolling and bring her back to the emotional state during that encounter).

In short what you did is ask her twice to call you back, she didn't. All is not lost of course, but I would certainly initiate her with text for the time being, and I'd use mostly statements (funny ones) to capture her attention, rather than qualifying yourself to her or asking logic-driven questions (e.g., "How old are you?" "How many siblings do you have?" "What is your major?") which will only kill the seduction (this isn't a job interview, remember).



No answer. Went back to class and she started the conversation the second she saw me. "Hey did you finsih the book? Did you like it? What'd you think of it" since we had to read a whole book we had time to talk about it at the beggining of class, she sat next to me and talked the whole time, still asking questions.

Aren't women funny little creatures? They can go cold and aloof one moment, to interested and warm right up to you the next.


Throughout this whole time, I did not bring up once anything about the week off, or the why she didn't pick up.

Good. I know you wanted to ream her out, but you must control that urge and remember she's under NO obligation to you. More importantly, take it as an indicator that you've yet to build enough comfort and attraction (likely more attraction) with her to make her want to have that phone conversation with you (hence engaging her in light, humorous text first - you've got to learn how to walk before you run).

Class ends and before she leaves she comes up to me while I'm still at the desk and says "I'll see you thursday!"

Maybe I made a mistake by giving in and offering her a ride home? Cat String?

No, you didn't. Look, we reflect on all these things we think we did wrong because we didn't meet the objective we had in mind. If she had in fact been more responsive to your call and text, we would likely be having a very different conversation or none at all right now. The fact is you took her home, that was a nice gesture and she probably liked that you did that AND felt some level of comfort with you to agree to the ride in the first place. One step at a time my man, just cool out a bit and realize you need to build greater investment from her end. You can do this through flirtatious behavior, engaging her in role play, being frisky with her (e.g. tickling, light hair pulling etc), poking fun at her (not in a mean way) - most girls LOVE to laugh at themselves but do be careful with this one, using callback humor (as previously suggested through text), sexual baiting and misinterpretation (e.g., framing yourself as the prize but in a playful manner), light teasing, funny pet names, etc..

Okay well...

I understand that me offering a ride can be bad, which is why I am second guessing myself now after the fact (perhaps 20 20 hindsight). But at the same time this is a college situation. From what I've noticed not many have the priviledge to have a car during these years. She did mention she was going to take the bus home, which is why I offered the ride. At the same time, she's allowing me to see where she lives so I actually viewed these as good. I do realize that ME ASKING for the ride might have been hindering, but what came after may not be the case.

Again, it was a sweet gesture. Don`t go by what PUA has told you. Being 'nice' to a girl is not a bad thing at all, in fact it'll usually go a ways in building comfort, but also may set frame for boyfriend material (hence why PUA suggests you don't do these things if solely looking for hookups). So long as you aren't conferring neediness, you're fine. Some girls wont even accept a ride, or that a guy buy her a meal because it makes her feel obligated to return the favor (e.g., sex), while others will go out with a guy just to get free sh*t. Really, who's to say. But the fact that she let you see where she lives tells me she feels comfort with you, and that's a good thing. You're thinking way too much, get out of your head son.

When I gave her a ride home we played the question game and one of the questions was about the relationship status. She's single.

Girls who have no interest in guys will typically say they're not single. Whether she'd meant it this way or not, take it as an IOI.

I absolutely agree that college girls are probably the most confusing. But I also understand that in college we have countless opportunities with different people. We ourselve may have done this... The point is: they are indecisive and appear confusing because of all the options they have. If this is the case, a PUA must be the one with the best game to make her decission easy.

Careful with generalizations, we don't know her intentions at this point its just way too early. Don't get over eager is my best advice for you with what you've presented. Patience is a virtue.

Unless I'm understanding this all wrong...

So what's the next move? and more importantly, what went through her head?

Focus on building attraction while on a lower level building comfort. Re-engage her in person, don't be afraid to show any initiative, this does not make you look needy in fact it does quite the contrary. Don't ask her out for a bit, simply focus on the aforementioned attraction-building techniques I had previously mentioned. Engage her in idle text conversations, keep them light and airy with a touch of humor (or more as you feel is needed) focusing more on statements than asking actual questions. Also, end most of your interactions whether it be through the phone or in person on a high note so as to leave a positive after-image or imprint on the interaction in her head - this makes a pretty big difference and has a carry over effect to your next interaction. Make note of things the two of you shared, or things you know she likes or observed to use in your callback humor through text or in-person conversations. Above and beyond all else don't over analyze everything because it'll only thwart your 'game' making it ever-more difficult being present with her and showing her your true self which is probably your best asset anyway (ironic, huh!).


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PostPosted: Fri Oct 26, 2012 5:41 pm 
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Solid advice.

I can see why the dinner idea can be considered lame in college and how acting fast and in a fun manner is possitive.

Yet,

at the same time I can see how building attraction is priority seeing how comfort has clearly been established.

I'll be completely honest guys, I gave up on this one. I went out with another chick from my humanities class last night and I'll be seeing her again this weekend at her place for dinner.

I'm not really as interested in getting this English girl, as much as understanding the actual theory/ actions I did for her to act in the way she did so I don't make these mistakes again. As mention I do enjoy this hobby, but it's something I like to think about due to the manipulation of human behavior aspect of it. I f*cking love it. And you're absolutely right, PUA is concentrates around hook ups, but I use these "theories" to get the girl I'd like to see for the next few days/weeks/months. It works.

The reason I called and texted her that was because I've been following the forum "When to call girls back!" by Jsmooth with quite some success for a while now. And I do believe that somewhere around here was my mistake.

I still plan on seeing where I can take this. I'll update the forum on the conclusion in a few days.

Thank you again for your help. I still wish more people to contribute and tell me other opinions so we'll keep this forum alive for a little longer.


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PostPosted: Fri Oct 26, 2012 6:44 pm 
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see and this is why you'll fail with the humanities girl as well.

You're mindset is scarce.

"OOh I'm talking with one girl." Shit it doesn't work out. "Now I'm still talking to one girl, but it's not the same girl."

Try shit on the English girl, and the humanities girl and every other girl you talk to. Stop focusing on one.


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PostPosted: Fri Oct 26, 2012 8:27 pm 
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Quote:
see and this is why you'll fail with the humanities girl as well.

You're mindset is scarce.

"OOh I'm talking with one girl." Shit it doesn't work out. "Now I'm still talking to one girl, but it's not the same girl."

Try shit on the English girl, and the humanities girl and every other girl you talk to. Stop focusing on one.
A very important lesson to be taught to many PUA!

However, not to me, I was simply gaming more than one girl at the same time and ended up with another of my options. The fact that I posted about the English girl was simply becuase I was confused at this new scenario and wanted some perspective in order to learn. Not to mention I've always wanted to post something, but never had something I thought worthy. I'm not here for the usual "Does she like me" or "Don't get AA" bs answers I see people post all the time, I'm here for the "What did I do wrong to improve next time" responses.


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 Post subject: Re: Only real PUA please
PostPosted: Fri Oct 26, 2012 11:28 pm 
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Ok, a bit late, but since you would like more input, i ll give it a go anyway. i didnt read all of the replies however, so i might be saying the same thing.
Quote:

I just moved to CA and started at a new college junior level transfer. Met this girl in my english class one day we do a paper peer editing. We get along great, she gives me many indications of interest (age, why I moved, who I live with, what classes) without me ever even giving her my name or asking for hers. She offered to give me her e-mail so she can send me her paper later on. Few days later we exchanged a few emails regarding the paper that were flirty. A week passes by and after class I offer her a ride home and she accepts, when I drop her off, I ask her to dinner and this is where is gets tricky. She said yes and gave me her number, made me call her so she would have mine. Class would be cancelled for the next week and a half so I wouldn't see her otherwise. This was on a Tuesday. On Thursday I call, and no answer, leave a text "Hey ___, this is Machiavillain. Hope you enjoyed your day off! Give me a call back when you're avaliable" No reply so I called again on Sunday. No answer. Went back to class and she started the conversation the second she saw me. "Hey did you finsih the book? Did you like it? What'd you think of it" since we had to read a whole book we had time to talk about it at the beggining of class, she sat next to me and talked the whole time, still asking questions. Throughout this whole time, I did not bring up once anything about the week off, or the why she didn't pick up. Class ends and before she leaves she comes up to me while I'm still at the desk and says "I'll see you thursday!"
the asking for a dinner was wrong. it is not the fact that you ask her for dinner that is wrong. it is the reason behind it. you offer her a ride, she accepts. you ride her home (i dont know what happened in the car, but i can figure it was mostly flufftalk and some question game...?). She accepted the ride and when you drop her off and you ask her for dinner. You both know why you asked her, but you know because you are you and she knows because of common sense. She accepted the ride and you probably (i do say probably) saw that as a very good thing, as in, she might like me. I dont know, i am only assuming here. So you want to press your luck and ask her for dinner. But did you say out loud why you want to have dinner with her? Did you say something: 'you might be a person i like; i want to get to know you. Lets go for dinner' or 'i find you amusing and would like to fuck you, lets go for dinner first'. No you probably didnt, and why didnt you do that? Perhaps because you thought that your intention was implied.

But if not so, then why the hell did she accept if she doesnt like you that much yet? Well, you are obviously a nice guy, you gave her a ride home, saying no in your face would be rude... at least in her mind. she knows you like her, but she doesnt know why. kinda hard to explain, but she probably has something like, he doesnt know me and likes me just because i look good. She might find it shallow. So i would suggest next time, be a tiny bit more direct. i like the fact that you dont seem to be afraid of going for what you want, but i would say you need a bit more of that directness.

Furthermore, I get a feeling of neediness when you write about the calls. Calling is good, i like it better then texting, to me it feels like its more personal. But the entire calling situation has an air of you being afraid that she will flake and you need her to reassure you that she wont. One call would have been enough. I see it like this: you called her once and asked her to call you back. then it is up to her.

You need to be able to put it beside you. It is up to her now. its somewhat a moment of truth. it shows your progress :). But as advice here i would say: be patient and let them come. When they dont come, dont freak out. you did that very good!
Quote:
Maybe I made a mistake by giving in and offering her a ride home? Cat String?
I dont think it was a mistake. You can be helpful and friendly, but then stick to your guns. You asked her to drive her home, just that. And so will it always be perceived, as something you do out of kindness. Never believe she lets you drive her around because she is particular fond of you, but i think you get that. Never hand out favours and expect more because you did the favour. However, driving her home can give you the opportunity to develop a genuine interest in her. Suppose while in the car you ask: so, beside studying, what do you do? and she answers: well, at night i am highly trained ninja assassin killing off bad guys who have been released from prison. Then is totally ok for you to say: "holy shit, that is awesome! i want to know more from you because i didnt see that in you. Lets go for dinner to get to know each other more. ". As a pua, you need to be able to mold the situation in such a way so that you can discover these things, if you know what i mean. if not, ask again, i ll go deeper into the subject.
Quote:
I absolutely agree that college girls are probably the most confusing. But I also understand that in college we have countless opportunities with different people. We ourselve may have done this... The point is: they are indecisive and appear confusing because of all the options they have. If this is the case, a PUA must be the one with the best game to make her decission easy.
they are not that confusing if you go straight for what you want. They might have many opportunities. But you need to be that guy that is different from almost every other guy. You need to understand that emotional healthy woman crave good long sex on one side, and that they need to be an example of chastity towards to outside world. However, there is a difference between knowing hte path and walking the path (thank you matrix-morpheus for that quote). By that i mean that knowing it but not doing something with it, doesnt get you any further. you will see that college girls are not that confusing anymore once you understand that they want mind blowing sex. And if you give it to them, they will not let you go easily. In that way, a pua most indeed be the one with the best game. In my opinion, a pua goes straightforward for what he desires, is honest about what he desires and he makes use of the fact that woman want freaking good sex.
Quote:
So what's the next move? and more importantly, what went through her head?
the next move should be taking a step back. Live your life and see her as an acquaintance, until the opportunity presents itself to discover something about this girl that you genuinely like. then escalate again. Dont befriend her, but dont get too distant either. An acquaintance :)

i hope i made some sense here. if not, shoot!

cheers and good luck!

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PostPosted: Sun Oct 28, 2012 9:18 am 
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I just moved to CA and started at a new college junior level transfer. Met this girl in my english class one day we do a paper peer editing. We get along great, she gives me many indications of interest (age, why I moved, who I live with, what classes) without me ever even giving her my name or asking for hers. She offered to give me her e-mail

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PostPosted: Sun Oct 28, 2012 9:22 am 
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Maybe I made a mistake by giving in and offering her a ride home? Cat String?

Okay well...

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PostPosted: Sun Oct 28, 2012 7:29 pm 
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NEW UPDATE

All right, guys. I decided to take a completely different route on this one and now it's become so interesting I really couldn't help but share.

So Thursday I go to class and again she comes up to me talking to me about the class and the book we just started. I completely ignore her aside from a few responses of "oh okay" and when she asked me what I thought of some character I cut her off and said

"hey, listen I think you're really smart and cheerful, but I am looking for something more fun than a conversation about our English class. I know asking for dinner was lame, but I was kinda really looking to meet new people to go to parties since I AM new. But seriously, no worries! Definitively let me know if you need help with any papers though"

(I seriously practiced beforehand)

I turned around and pretended to text and class started. She didn't try talking to me for the remainder of the class.

...

She texted me this morning asking if I wanted to go to a party tonight.

So sh*t son, I appreciate the advice on being straightforward while also expanding how she saw my motives behind dinner. As you saw, I decided to add some push-pull along with a line that'd leave her wanting to qualify herself as well.

So many questions. I'll leave it open.


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PostPosted: Sun Oct 28, 2012 8:35 pm 
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yeah bro good job

girls love that shit when guys are straight forward with their intentions, as long as it's congruent

college girls don't really like dinner dates, it's too much pressure for their vagina to handle. Plus you are already vibing well with this chick in class, why bother spending another 1-2 hours talking?

this girl should be easy to close


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