Hey guys,
So I'm back into this after a long time away. I don't know why I'm writing this, it's not a revelation, it's not anything that hasn't been said before but I think writing it down serves as a good reminder for myself.

Game isn't hard. It doesn't require huge formulas and stacks and stacks of material and exact steps to follow.

I was out with a friend last night. He's a regular guy, I wouldn't call him a "natural" and he isn't in the game. He's like any other guy, not bad with girls but not swimming in it either.

Anyway, we had just met and were sitting at the bar on our first drink and he noticed a girl across the way. After a few minutes he just said to me "I've gotta talk to that blonde girl" and off he went.

He didn't use any lines, he just said Hi!. He didn't use any routines, just chatted to her. He didn't peacock, he just sat down next to her. He didn't use any tricks, he didn't escalate or get physical quickly. He just played it cool and made conversation. Not tricks, no games, he just did it and tried his luck.

The girl was cute, I'd give her a 9 and she was dressed more casual than "Saturday night".
She didn't give off any IOI's, she didn't have any major reactions to the things he was saying, he just engaged in what he was saying.

So it was still pretty early and we got a text where we were meeting our other friends that night so we decided to head out. We chatted for a few minutes and she came over having previously given no IOI's and gave my friend a huge hug and insisted on swapping numbers.... he did... and off we went.

Now, it's not a big lay story... he just got a number, but I'd figure, it was a pretty solid number... this girl was really cute.

My point being... it's not that hard.

Game is a way of breaking down a "structure" for interacting with girls for guys who struggle otherwise. And that's a good thing. But it's not a set of guaranteed steps everyone MUST learn and do.

Even with the best Game, some girls just won't like you.
Even with NO Game, some girls will still love you.

I think I just needed to say this. I sometimes over analyse things so much, its really easy and sometimes the game can get inside your head too much.

It's not so hard, lots of guys get numbers and get laid just being themselves, you'll win some, you lose some, but losing a few shouldn't get you down too much, focus on the ones you win.

yay a newbie who understands

the faster you throw away all the fucking steps, and do what you just FEEL LIKE DOING when interacting with a girl, the more natural you are, and the better results.

I disagree with 80% of what you said. Lets see how you do, good luck!

Care to expand?

Like I said... I'm fairly new to this again after a long layoff... I'm not saying PU is bullsh*t or anything like that.
I'm just saying, it's so easy for a new guy like me to get inside his head, go crazy with AA, over analysing what to say, what to do, how to act, etc...

PU is really good for giving a structure to how some interactions. Especially for guys who have gotten into this having almost never approached a girl in his life, but I'm just saying it's still really easy to get sucked in to thinking every interaction has to go a certain way.

Sometimes a girl is just into you, it won't take a lot of game, or any at all.
Sometimes a girl is just not, but the community likes to make guys feel like they are a miserable failure and their game sucks if a particular approach goes badly. Which is a bad mentality. She might not like you or might have a BF or having something else going on, who knows.

That's just some stuff I've found. I'm not saying PU is a bad thing, otherwise I wouldn't be here to learn it...

Detox... looks like you've been around here a lot longer than I have. If I'm totally wrong (which I could well be!), feel free to give a good argument to help new guys like me.

fair enough, when I get back from work soon ill expound prolix, hold on

Just because a guy is being himself doesn't mean he's doing something that works. Fortunately your friend does something that works.

I've met a lot of guys who are straight up geeks. Their jokes and what they like to talk about only appeal to other geeks like them. Thier rate of success would be so low that they'd never build up confidence if they didn't change.

Most game instruction is a two step process:
1. change yourself into something that works
2. be yourself

Of course, I always respect the "desensitize yourself to rejection and keep trying" method. If you're tough enough, it works for anybody whether they want to change or not.

DeadEye nails it.

If your a geek thats sits on a computer all day, and go out sarging at night and try to make it up with bunch of routines, is not gonna work. Build a lifestyle that attracts girls, not repels them. This is when all the routines will drop.

Ill try to keep it short, which usually isn't my style, but I could go off on this in a very long post, but I'm tired.

Estate, what you are saying is completely logical and most guys would agree with you, unfortunately most guys would be wrong and most guys have no game and don't get laid often. You basically saying that success with woman is a combination of luck + compatibility.

While that may appear to be true to the casual observer, we can delve further to see a clear Perado principle in action: guys who know how to game properly, and actively approach are exponentially more successful with woman then normal (AFC) guys. This is a combination of game + effort + logistics. In your example you are making and assumption and a generalization. You are assuming yoru friend is juts a normal guy and got lucky, I think your friend has way more game (natural or learned) than you are giving him credit for. You are also generalizing from this example, or possibly rationalizing, that a magical confluence of events landed in his favor to get him the girl. Its amazing how the same guys tend to get lucky over and over and most other guys don't.

Of course if you blow off the admittedly difficult path of learning game as ineffective, or label it as a collection of arbitrary and trivial parlor tricks, then that absolves you from actually making an effort to get better with woman and you can resign yourself to your immutable fate - insallah.

Aristotle said: "Man is by nature a political animal." By this, he meant that people live in groups and are therefore inherently social beings. He was right. Throughout their childhood, most people build a certain understanding of social dynamics. They learn how to act in and react to certain social situations. This knowledge is primarily tacit: hard, if not impossible, to express in words. Tacit knowledge is opposed to explicit knowledge: knowledge that can be easily expressed in words. Along with social dynamics, an example of tacit knowledge is riding a bike: someone can tell you how to ride a bike, but that is not at all the same as knowing how to actually do it.

Not everyone in the world has the same about of knowledge about social dynamics though. Some know much, and they become leaders in politics, business, or entertainment - and I assure you, these people get laid whenever they want. Sadly, there are also those who miss either the genetics or the environment to learn as much as the average person does in their childhood. It seems to me these people are into 'the game'.

To me, 'the game' is a method of analyzing human interaction. Its goal is to take the tacit knowledge about social dynamics that most people posses, and make it explicit. That is, to formulate rules of behavior that will lead to social success such as getting laid, being a leader, or being an alpha male. But as the bike riding example shows, knowing how to do something in principle is still different from actually doing it. Ultimately, the desired social success relies on tacit knowledge of human interaction: following 'the rules' will only get us so far. However, also comparable to riding a bike, gathering explicit knowledge will enhance our ability to learn the tacit knowledge that we seek. In fact, our dedication and analysis give us an advantage over those without it. So when we've finally lost our muteness, our awkwardness, and our creepiness by putting ourselves in social situations until we feel like our heads will explode, we will outshine all those who have not. We will know everything, we will be the leaders, the centers of attention, the alpha males. We will have game.

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One of the most useful things you will ever learn about body language.