Ok so basically i met this chick last week who i had a connection with but logistics were difficult because her brother was on location. Therefore i number closed and as going to try again...

We went out again last night and my friend was being a cockblock all night. I finally isolated with like 20 minutes left til close at the bar. K-closed for the first time on the dancefloor, held hands back to my house, yada yada yada.

When back at my house, i made sure my friends had their sleeping situations in order and told her to come with me to my room.

Makeout and and a little extra is about as far as it went before she said she wanted to "take it slow and get to know me". I really didnt know what to say so i just said it was no big deal and took it down a notch. Seems strange to me that she would sleep in my bed and have that mentality.

It's really not a huge deal to me but i want to make sure she puts out next time. My end goal in all of this game is to find someone I'm compatible with so I'm not scared of commitment with the right girl but at the same time I'm a dude and have needs.

Sounds to me like a "freeze out" could of worked here...

Second that. Should've just been like "oh, okay" as if everything was fine, then turned the lights on if they were off, maybe got your laptop out and checked your email or just moved away from her and stopped any physical contact

I guess i basically knew that was the best option but i did a very shitty job of accomplishing that. It's not really my style so i have a hard time of pulling it off.

I guess next time i see her i should attempt to escalate again and if i get the same sort of thing I'll be prepared to freezeout harder. I'm not really anticipating nearly as many obstacles next time though because she does appear very into me.

lmr-again-vp496557.html#496557

just lmr,

agree and continue, ''yea we should take things slow'' *continue to make out and feel her up without taking it slower* keep going until she hits an actual stop what you are doing breaking point, (read linked post), if she won't pass that point for you, after freeze out, just hold the frame that ''it's better if we just take it slow'' and try on a different day (preferably the next mourning if she sleeps over), or if you like, just enjoy the makeout for what it is

also another interesting strategy that my wing uses is he just starts taking off his clothes, she won't take off her shirt, he will just take off his and act like it is normal when being questioned ''he is just getting comfortable'', she won't take off her pants, he just takes his off, etc. etc.

The advice here is all true.

Trying to persuade her logically is a bad idea. You have to get her to stop thinking logically and just go with what feels good.

You can move things forward without being forceful. If you're making out with her, you can try to feel her up. If you're feeling her up, you can try to get her undressed. If you're undressed, you can try to move your hands and mouth to more intimate areas.

The worst she can say is "no", and you should always always listen.

But she might be more into it than you think. "Slow" isn't a "no". It's "I want to be here, and I want to be doing this, but not sure how much further I want to go and how fast." So try some things out. If it feels good, she won't stop you.

And if she stops you, then stop. Back off. At that point, on an emotional level, she'll decide whether it feels worse to move too fast with you, or if it feels worse to stop altogether.

A lot of times, stopping feels worse. She'll jump YOU.

Thanks guys. I was aware of a freezeout but it's clear as day that I went about applying it all wrong. Ididnt try to persuade her because i know that's always bad. Basically I agreed that kissing was good enough for me and ramped down the aggressiveness but kept the physical contact going. That caused her to still be content with what was going on. I should have moved a little to the side and talked, turned on the tv or something.