I screwed up everything with my girlfriend.



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PostPosted: Mon Aug 06, 2012 5:48 pm 
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I messed up.

I've been dating my girlfriend for about 6 months now. And everything is great.

But, I fucked up.
My ex texted me. Now no, I did not have sex or touch or even see her.
But all we've been doing is texting. I don't even text her much. Nothing flirty, just as friends. I didn't want my gf to know. So I didn't tell her.

I forgot my phone at her house today. And she found my phone. And she saw the texts. Now I wouldn't freak out.
But I was bored at work and said Haha visit me and said workplace.
And she asked if my gf woudl be there, I said no she wouldn't.
She said what are you doing after work
I said "with my girlfriend :D"
Now my girlfriend has read this. And freaked out on me, it looks bad I know. But I really like her and I want to fix this. Do you guy have nay ideas? thanks.


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PostPosted: Mon Aug 06, 2012 6:20 pm 
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i dont understand this post


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PostPosted: Mon Aug 06, 2012 6:53 pm 
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You kind of had this coming. Let this be a lesson to be a little more loyal next time. Yeah, I know, that sounds extreme for such a minor situation but imagine if the tables were turned.

Anyway, apologize once if you haven't already, then forget about it. If you don't make it a big deal, she won't drag it out as long.


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PostPosted: Mon Aug 06, 2012 7:00 pm 
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Yeah, I know, that sounds extreme for such a minor situation but imagine if the tables were turned.
it seems "minor" to us because we know the full story (guy has never cheated with ex-GF, just been overly flirtatious, ...). his GF does not have this full view. to her it looks like "BF is setting up secret meeting with exGF".

if this were going the other way round, we would have a whining post from BF where he would overly analyze every little AFC slip he did in his relationship, including the one time he gave a bad look to his GF when she said some random guy on the street was hot, and a bunch of us would be screaming "dump the cheating whore and GFTOW"

to her, it's a huge deal. probably break-up material or close to it. treat is as such. take time to reassure her. make sure to promise you will never do any such thing at length. bring her out to dinner. be romantic and appreciative of her.

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PostPosted: Mon Aug 06, 2012 7:11 pm 
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Quote:
Quote:
Yeah, I know, that sounds extreme for such a minor situation but imagine if the tables were turned.
it seems "minor" to us because we know the full story (guy has never cheated with ex-GF, just been overly flirtatious, ...). his GF does not have this full view. to her it looks like "BF is setting up secret meeting with exGF".

if this were going the other way round, we would have a whining post from BF where he would overly analyze every little AFC slip he did in his relationship, including the one time he gave a bad look to his GF when she said some random guy on the street was hot, and a bunch of us would be screaming "dump the cheating whore and GFTOW"

to her, it's a huge deal. probably break-up material or close to it. treat is as such. take time to reassure her. make sure to promise you will never do any such thing at length. bring her out to dinner. be romantic and appreciative of her.
That's pretty much the point I was trying to make. It's just important that he doesn't exacerbate the issue even more in her mind by apologizing a million times. But aside from that, I agree with you completely.


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PostPosted: Mon Aug 06, 2012 7:27 pm 
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I'm sorry your relationship doesn't have the trust to not look at the other person's text messages. I would be pretty pissed about that.

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PostPosted: Mon Aug 06, 2012 10:45 pm 
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If she will meet up with you just:

Meet up with her, sit her down, tell her how sorry you are and you never intended to do anything with your ex and that you would hate for something like this to be the reason why you broke up as she deserves better and you know that.

if she will only text you just do it via text.

aka

"Baby I know your upset and I'm feeling so shit that its me that's made you upset, you deserve better. I promise you that I never intended to do anything with this> I would hate for this to be the reason for us to breakup, I don't want that"

I imagine you will get some sort of "I don't it either" response. After that just put "I'l give you some space to think" just don't be clingy, overly beg and such.

You want to be perfectly balanced between begging for forgiveness and respecting that she needs time. This is what I've done with girlfriends in the past when I've done worse. Not sex, just getting off with girls when I'm drunk and being an idiot.


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PostPosted: Mon Aug 06, 2012 11:09 pm 
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Does it help that I tell everyone to meet up with me at work?
I don't have a career yet, I'm just a sales associate at a store.

Thanks for the advice guys though. I'll talk to her. I'm seeing her tonight.


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PostPosted: Mon Aug 06, 2012 11:26 pm 
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Does it help that I tell everyone to meet up with me at work?
I don't have a career yet, I'm just a sales associate at a store.

Thanks for the advice guys though. I'll talk to her. I'm seeing her tonight.
To guys: Yes

To Girls: "omg he's meeting up with his ex-gf omg what the fuck"

Also yeah it was wrong of her to go thru your phone but she found something to be fair.


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