Quote:
Hi
I have no problem approaching, but I am a boring piece of shit. all I do is interview. I dont know what to say.
I have seen simple pickup's stuff, but for some reason, I cant apply it. I like that asian guy's style, when he says something outrageous like "oh, you are a dancer so you must like sex" or "if you could wake up anywhere in the world, where would it be?" but I can never transition from "hi what's your name" to these.
I guess I have a good idea of what an interesting conversation is like, I just dont know how to lead into it. like when you introduce yourself, how do you transition into "if you could wake up anywhere, where would it be?"
Hey mate!
Why fixate on a transition? Why would there be a need to make things look smoothly? Transitioning is actually another excuse for not doing what you would really like to do. Transitioning is another idea brought to life to hide yourself behind in hopes of getting result out of the blue.
You are a man! You chose what you want to talk about! Ok, it is socially not that excepted to go from: 'hey, how are you' to 'what is the most outrageous place you ever had sex?'
Your questions need to be interactive, based on what she tells you. Dont memorise 'interesting questions'. Be interested in her, be interactive in the conversation. Check out these examples:
BAD EXAMPLE:
you: hey! how are you?
her: oh well... good i suppose.
you: oh, so... what do you do for a living?
her: (???)... i am a plastic surgeon specialized in sex changes
you: oh, and where are you from?
her:(???) Pixieland, ruled by an evil overlord from outer space
you: oh, nice... so... we had nice weather today, wouldnt you say?
You see, this is a bit exaggerated, but the point is: you arent really interested in what she is saying. You are interenally focussed on what to say next, nervous perhaps and you completely shut her out. Hence more likely you are going into interview mode.
GOOD EXAMPLE:
you: hey! how are you?
her: oh well... good i suppose...
you:... oh lord, the enthousiasm...
. That didnt sound good at all! Had a bad hairday today?
her: (smile) heheh, yeah, you can say that...(silence on her behalf)
you: (silence on your behalf, look like you expect her to tell you all about it)...
* perhaps this might seem like an awkward moment, this little silence, but dont let her off the hook*
you: well common, tell me all about it
her: hehehe, well ok. so today one of my bunnies died.
you: your bunnies? (look suspicious at her)
her: yeah, well i am a veterinarian, and i had this bunch of rare bunnies, hobwobblers. I spent so much time in them, but still one died this morning.
you: omg, that is bad! I would feel quite bad as well, although i dont know how a hobwobblers look like. Omg, those hobwobblers, they arent that fluffy cute kind of rabbits, are they? You know, those that look like giant balls of hair with ears?
her: hehe, they are!
you: omg! in that case, i would feel soo bad i would have taken half a box of prosac!
her: haha, yeah
you: well, although this might have been a bad day, there has to be something good about it as well?
her: blablalbal
Do you see the difference? In the second example, you take what she says and you ask things you want to know. Interesting things. Imagine what you would do and tell her that! how you would feel and how she feels, those are the things that matter. Also notice the 'transition' at the end. I didnt transit, i just asked if something good did happen. You can do that with any subject!
I hope it helped a bit. If you have more questions, shoot!
CHAT
