Ok I need help...

I tend to have a problem with coming off as a witty guy. I just never have witty comments and have been told that I'm pretty dumb (not really book dumb but street dumb)(typical dumb blonde...) I do not like this! I want to be perceived as the guy who has a lot of common sense!

Any help would be much appreciated. Maybe reading more intellectual books perhaps?

Thanks in advance!

"brevity is the soul of wit" (William Shakespeare)

The key to being witty is to put a bumper sticker on it, to use a tag line so to say ; your are witty when you put your thoughts into the shortest amount of words as possible. Its not what your saying so much as how you communicate it. The problem is most people just talk, they vomit out their words. What you want to do is to think and then sharpen your words. Then your words will be very impactful on whoever you are talking to. if you want humor the words will be overwhelmingly funny...if you want to inspire the words will be powerful inspiring...if you want to hurt, the words will heart you to your heart. Remember...

"its not what you say, its how you say it."

Also I like to catch people by surprise with these statements. They have a stronger impact because the person’s guard is down.
Also, Ilike to repeat the statement. If somethings is funny or inspiring when you say it 3 times it really drives the point home and builds up the feeling.
And, I also like to use a dramatic pause . As in im talking. Im talking. Im talking…(pause) then I make the witty comment.

Also I may add emphasis with the words i say with my voice.

Hmm, that's some good advice! I'm just that kind of goofy class clown kid BY NATURE. I have no problem attracting women, but I can definitely tell it's a turn off when they've had to much of it. If I had some wittiness to thrown in there my personality would be gold (NOT trying to be cocky). Lately I've been hangin' with this tight knit group of kids. They're all funny as hell with all the smart remarks they make and they're hick as fuck! You've helped me out a lot though!

This is really great advice.

To the original poster... if you have a good sense of humor, and you're book smart, then what makes you think you don't already have the ingredients to be a witty person? You want to emulate these other kids with a good sense of humor, but it sounds like you already got it.

What IwantEasyLove told you is very fruitful information.

I would suggest to hang around people who you consider witty, as vcwriter inferred. You will start repeating some of their behavior.

You know that moment when you come home from a confrontation or an interaction with someone and you tell yourself "I should have said that". When that perfect comment comes two hours too late. Guess what, remember that one. Always replay the awesome witty comments that you com up with too late in your head. People say the same things over and over and you can reuse most comments for a number of occasions.

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I'm not trying to be a dick Ezo, but you're being a Pick Up Snob in my opinion.

bbardot: you just reminded me about porn

Yeah I have the skills for it, I just don't know how to bring it out in me. Like my good sense of humor comes from me being GOOFY and not WITTY. I feel like sometimes im being laughed AT and not WITH. This has definitely helped.