I have a friend who works with me in the same place. She has a boyfriend. She told me that she loves him, and that she is staying with him. However, she likes me, and wants to be my friend. The problem I'm having, is that her boyfriend doesn't like this. She made it clear to me and him that she is not interested in me in that way, but her boyfriend wants to talk to me. He said that he hopes that I will choose to have a conversation with him. He thinks it makes me look really bad that I text her to ask her if she is okay when she seems stresed.

I was thinking about talking to him in a publc place with her and him, but my mother advises against it. At the very least, I can simply talk to him on the phone. But the thing is, I don't know what I'm really talking to him about. From what I understand, he just wants to know that I'm not going to make any moves on his girlfriend.

I have gotten several opinions on this. The general consensus is that I don't even bother talking to him, and simply cut off the emails and text messages. And one of my friends told me to simply talk to him, and tell him that myself, that I won't text or email her anymore. And that if she wants to be friends with me, she would make an effort to do so. She would have to be the one to insist on hanging out with me.

The whole situation is confusing, frustrating, and has been going on for over a year already. We are very good friends, but it is hard to be friends when she has a boyfriend that possibly sees me as a threat.

What is the best way to address this situation? Do I talk to him? Do I talk to him over the phone or in public? Or do I simply have her give him the message?

I was told that we can still be friends, and simply talk at work. But no more emails, text messages, and no more hanging out at lunch time.

The first time I agreed to talk to her boyfriend, I didn't because:

A. She told him that I liked her in that way.
B. I wasn't sure of her intentions (I wasn't sure if she was just using me to make him jealous).

I know B. is not the case anymore though. I actually trust her. The whole situation is complicated.

I just don't know what to do. We have went back and forth, periods of not really talking to each other, because I felt uncomfortable about the whole situation. I told her that I would not cut her off again, but by no longer texting and emails, and not hanging out at lunch, to her that is like me cutting her off again.

I just simply don't want any problems.

So, basically, I need to know. Do I talk to her boyfriend? I'm not entirely sure want I'm even talking about. He wants me to talk to him. It's really the most confusing awkward situation I have ever had to deal with.

Please, any advice would greatly be appreciated.

Thanks.

I'd just let it go, tell her "look, you're a great person but I don't need all this heavy drama over a coworker so maybe we should just keep it at that, work".