Hello.

Here's some insight in my situation:
So we're both 18, she's still a virgin. We regulary see eachother. We're not a couple. I managed to finger/oral her, when we got the chance to sleep together, we were both drunk but i'm pretty sure i was able to make her cum(although it took me some time).
I openly told her I'm seeing other women, she was cool with that. She brought up the subject of sex few times; saying she'd do it with some1 she can trust. And then 10 minutes later she says she trusts me. Or directly telling me she'd do it with me but she sometimes feels like I care too less.


Now here's the thing: Most of the times, we see eachother out in public for a drink, so there's no way i'd f-close her there, so we usually just make out. On the other hand, I have trouble getting her to my place. I highly believe this is connected to the fact that she's a virgin. Although she flaked me few times on invitation to my place, SHE keeps inviting me out. So yesterday when she asked me out, I told her we can meet up at my place and see a movie or something. She replied:'' I do not want to meet you at your place it would end up bad '' I played it cool told her I'll call her up later today when I have time and set up when I can meet her.

Here are my general questions:


1. Should I even keep going with this girl or is she a lost case?

2. Basic thoughts on the process of f-closing virgins.

3. I feel like we lack some sexuality sometimes, because of the given enviroment; What is best way to create sexual tension during day?

She seems interested . Bring up the subject of sex to her sometime, and make her feel comfortable about it. Persuade her that it is the best thing ever, and that it will be very special. If she ends up coming to your home again or so, do a lot of fareplay so the probability of her resisting is very slight. I never fucked a virgin so I can't give you tips on that. All I know is that you need to be very gentle doing it at the start and then add another finger or 2. It will be painful to her the first time obviously, but it will happen anyway

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Yeah. What i noticed though is, that i have less sexual relationship with her than with any other girl so far (they were not virgins though). She really is the kind of girl who won't do 1/4 step towards you. So myself being a passive kind of guy (usually giving girls the hints to make moves) maybe I should just take initiative and become more sexual with her instead of giving hints and leting her react. Just pull her and kiss her. I did get under her pants but i want to do it more often. SHE IS DEFI into me. She texted me 1. today inviting me to her place and making me lunch lol although i told her i will call her later today. I just want to bring this relationship from causal make out to having deeper, sexual relationship.

I was wondering to have a direct conversation with her. I'd tell her i like her but i feel like we need to progress our intimacy/sexuality. That i want to kiss her on every part of her body. That i want to bite her neck and ears. That i want to give her screaming orgasms. That i want to wake up next to her. That I am not forcing her into anything, but want to make our relationship clear. Either we become sexual or we stop being hook ups and keep our relationship on friend only level.

What do you guys think of this?

Are you a virgin???

Look man she told she wants to do it with someone she trust because she does not want to get hurt...so my thoughts are be responsible.

My quick answer would be to build more comfort with her. If you want to fuck her, build trust with her. She likes you, she sees you as a potential sexual candidate. Build more trust with her, keep the sexuality as up as you can in the given environment, give off the aura you are confident being sexual.

But again, do you care enough for her to be her first time? She may find this a big deal, and you should respect it IMO.

She's a virgin so major LMR right there dude.

No I'm not.
Yes, I do.

On a side note:
I would even go in a serious relationship with her, but I'm not sure if that's what she really wants. She OFTEN jokes in conditionals like: If you were my boyfriend we would... But then again says she likes it casual and she doesn't care if I have other girls.

So when she said we're very alike, I kind of wanted to test her and said yeah and that's excatly why we could never be together. There wouldn't be the healthy balance between us. Next thing she said: Well we're not so much alike.
So I've started to think all her I don't care if you have other girls and I want it casual is a bunch of bullsh*t but she just doesn't want to be direct with me. Thoughts on that?



General topic:
As for LMR any particulary good tacs ? Since it's bigger deal because she's a virgin or should I just follow mystery's way od dealing with it?

OK, that's good that you care for her.

She may be saying all these things, but watch her behavior and the way she says these things. There is always some truth to a joke. She definitely wants you based on the info you've given us.

You can't fully know whether all the casual stuff is bullshit until you sleep with her really. How the hell can she know if she's fine with it if she's never experienced it herself?

I would say go for it. LMR, handle it the usual way. If she stops you, back off unaffected and do something else like check your email. And then go forward again. You know Dicarlo's escalation ladder? Just be calm if you experience LMR, be understanding, this is a big thing for her. Gentle is the game here I would say. I would say there would be less LMR if you build enough trust with her. But I've never had a virgin so I can't really give specific tips.

Yep, I got a copy of Escalation Ladder on my computer.

Thanks everyone for the insight/help, especially Tr@veler.