K, so I hung out with this cute, awesome girl from ok Cupid last Thursday for the first time. We ended up having a ton in common and similar personalities. Great date, great vibe the whole time. We held hands for most of it. I go for the kiss at the end, she leans away and says (laughing) "not on the first date!" The reason she gave me was that she doesn't kiss until after spends going out several times. Ok, whatever. I'm not hurting for girls right now.

Just Set up a date with her for this Thursday over text. Confirmed time and location, then she texts me "no funny business this time :p"

I'm thinking of responding with something I remember Style saying about girls who try to LJBF you...."I can't promise I won't do anything because I like to go with the flow I'm feeling. But I understand and respect your boundaries" But I've never dealt with this situation before, so I'm unsure if this is too serious or too I intense since we've only hung out once.

Input appreciated.

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D.G.A.F. isn't just a state. It's a lifestyle.

So why then make a mountain out of a molehill? A kiss doesn't solidify nor necessarily prove anything. Women kiss guys all the time, even ones they aren't into simply for validation. Stop putting so much stock in the 'f-close' and focus more on showing her a good time.

I can follow that, but I also don't want to buy into this frame of "ok you told me not to kiss you once so i won't do it again"

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D.G.A.F. isn't just a state. It's a lifestyle.

You're overthinking.

Yes, I know I am. I'm over thinking it because I have no clue how to respond to a text/situation like that. That's why I started a thread asking for advice on how to react.

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D.G.A.F. isn't just a state. It's a lifestyle.

Okay Bro, here's my two cents.
I've also had fair my share of girls pulling out at the last minute, "I dont kiss on the first date bla-bla" "I dont fuck on the first date" "Im not that easy" type of situations.
and in most cases they did it because of their ASD/ Buyer's remorse or I simply didn't built enough comfort and what not.
So after identifying the possible flaws in my game i looked for ways to correct it. (Same as you're doing now)
When ever a girl shows a little ASD,(in F-close situations) I just simply tell her "It's cool, I think we're both Adults here who can make up our own minds. so If you're not comfortable with this, cool. but im not gonna apologise for wanting you" (the end part is normally done with smile) more often than not they give in. Basically just keep ya cool.

Now to your situation.
Did you built enough comfort and try to sexualize the hang-out at some point?
Did you allow yourself to have fun and get her to Comply, via compliance tests? Did you Kino-escalate?
If not, then ofcourse you won't get a kiss dewd.
Always, and i mean always try to get her to comply, touch.

Happy Hunting!!

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http://realsocialdynamics.com/