So I have been gaming a girl for a while now, it seems whenever things are stale or I freeze her out or whatever she warms up to me (initiates contact, comes to see me etc) but when I start to warm up to her she backs off (doesn't reply to msgs, is always busy etc) its a crazy game of tug of war!
Anyway I figure I'm the man I should be taking charge, but how do I do that when she backs off to my advances? Is this a shit test to see if I am willing to take Control, or persist through the little games?

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just because my name is safety doesn't mean i like condoms

How far have you gotten with her? Have you made your intentions clear? Man up and tell her she's cute. Make at least one statement of intent here withou apologizing, but also in a fun way. Otherwise this is going to be an endless game of cat and mouse.

The next time you see her and you are getting good signals from her, tell her she makes you wanna kiss her. See her reaction, if she blushes or it's a good signal (even if she says "I don't know") its good to go.

It's alright to chase. But it has to be with the attitude of "I'm coming after you. If I lose you I don't care, but I'm still coming after you."

You freeze her out, and then chase after her once she starts intiating with you again.

Next time you freeze her out, keep your cool and don't chase her when she initiates. She's part punishing you (for being aloof & not prizing her like every other guy does) and more importantly knowing how to hit the right buttons to get you chasing her (so she feels prized). Stop doing this.