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If she asks about the ring just say, (long pause) ,"Till death do us part, she's not with us anymore".
Then immediately change the subject to a C&F story.
The ring is DHV. Your comment shows you find sentimential value in it but you dont wish to discuss it. Now it's a mystery. You didn't make a huge deal about it and started telling a positive story. Showing you're over it and don't have baggage and were once in a commitment til death. A nice challenge for her on multiple levels.
I totally disagree. I think this would turn most girls off, especially if she's interested in you because of the ring, which is pretty much the intention of wearing it. Why would you want to play down something that you were trying to use to your advantage, it's counter productive.
Subtley isn't gonna be the way to go here, sure you don't want to be telling in depth stories about things and making stuff up, cause it's all gonna be a lie most likely and you're gonna get caught up in it (the reason I don't lie anymore), but you don't want to dismiss the marriage thing, embrace it. Let her know you're married and that it's gonna have to be a secret thing between the two of you. Make it a sexy conspiracy between the two of you and let her get caught up in the danger and taboo of it, it'll turn her on and make her love the idea of a ONS, or a purely sexual relationship as a booty call.
I don't think I could ever do this, but if I did, the most fun part would be after having sex and letting her know that I wasn't married. Usually girls freak out when they find out you ARE married, but she may freak out when she finds out that you're really single and she didn't do anything wrong, haha!