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 Post subject: Quick question
PostPosted: Tue Feb 14, 2012 7:41 pm 
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Joined: Thu Apr 14, 2011 5:14 pm
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Location: Brazil
Had planned to go out with a girl tonight for Vday. She cancelled yesterday as she is off work with the flu. She said we can do something over the weekend.

Been on 2 dates so far

I text her this morning saying that I hope she's not feeling too ill ect but kept it light and joking.

It's taken her till well after dinner to reply.

I'm off out tonight to a singles night with my mates tonight so I'm not sure how I should play this?

Should I tell her? (she might think I'm being a dick)

Should I just not respond (play her at her own game)

Should I respond but not mention the night out specifically


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 Post subject:
PostPosted: Tue Feb 14, 2012 8:42 pm 
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You don't have to tell her out right if you've only been on a couple dates... you aren't committed to her.. but if she asks, you don't have to lie either. You aren't being a dick having a boys night.

shes in your reality and you are a high-value guy with friends and a life.

it doesn't matter how long it takes her to text you back.

cheers

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 Post subject:
PostPosted: Tue Feb 14, 2012 9:14 pm 
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your demonstrating low value by being so reactive to her needs, shes already showing signs of losing interest, your going to speed up that process on your current trajectory.


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 Post subject:
PostPosted: Wed Feb 15, 2012 12:01 am 
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Quote:
your demonstrating low value by being so reactive to her needs, shes already showing signs of losing interest, your going to speed up that process on your current trajectory.
Yea I know! It sucks.

Thing is I've no problem in losing her. It won't take me long to get another girl. I'm just not used to not having much rapport between dates. Makes me doubt myself which is never good. The dates themselves have been great but the conversations in between have been not that frequent. Good news is that I at least haven't texting her non stop. I just mirror her reply times or leave it even longer.


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 Post subject:
PostPosted: Wed Feb 15, 2012 12:13 am 
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Try calling her to set up this next date. I don't know how often you use phone calls but they're SO much better than texts. Trust me on that.


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 Post subject:
PostPosted: Wed Feb 15, 2012 1:03 am 
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Quote:
Try calling her to set up this next date. I don't know how often you use phone calls but they're SO much better than texts. Trust me on that.
That's what I was thinking of trying tomorrow. After she flaked last night she said that we should do something over the weekend. I am going to phone her tomorrow to arrange those plans.

She told me in person that she always gets clingers and needy guys and that they text or call her too much. I never did that and still don't.

Seems to be a near catch 22...

Text too much and you'll get nexted

Text too little and you'll lose rapport and interest



Though I'm sure there's a small window for success.


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 Post subject:
PostPosted: Wed Feb 15, 2012 3:06 am 
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texting is a poor tool for building attraction - something I realized after a long time texting


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 Post subject:
PostPosted: Wed Feb 15, 2012 3:27 am 
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Quote:
texting is a poor tool for building attraction - something I realized after a long time texting
That's true, plus you give the girl the luxury of thinking over her answer over a long period so quite often you don't get her natural response you get a contrived one.

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 Post subject:
PostPosted: Wed Feb 15, 2012 3:32 am 
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You went on two dates with a girl you didn't get married.. Why do you feel a need to tell her your whereabouts ? Hell she can sleep with a guy tonight if she wanted to and you couldn't say anything about it. You can also sleep with a women from the event your going to tonight and If I were you I would give it a shot :)

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