I've known this girl for almost a year now and we've always been good/flirty friends. We hung out a lot during the summer, but it fizzled out mostly due to my lack of escalation. I thought I was friendzoned by this girl and pretty much accepted this. However, we would still hang out together alone and be very flirty with each other, but I never thought too much of it since she recently got a boyfriend about 3 months ago.

However, a few weeks ago, we were hanging out at my place alone and after a few drinks she revealed that she is pretty much in love with me and really wanted to date me but never got the feeling that I was interested in her (I guess I played it too cool). I told her that I do like her and that if her relationship situation was different maybe there would be a chance for us.

So that same night, we ended hooking up with each other. I guess all our restrained emotions/sexual tension finally got the better of us. Since then, she texts me all the time, invites me to hangout just the two of us, and even tells me she loves me.
We've even hooked up 2 more times afterwards. The most recent time being last week when she came over at 2am for a late night booty call.

But here's the kicker...she's still with her boyfriend!

My issue is that I'm starting to really fall for this girl. I want to pursue a relationship with her, but I obviously can't do that when she's still dating the other guy.
And yes, I'm aware that she may very well cheat on me if I get with her. But i'm willing to take that risk. I find myself catching some real feelings for this girl...even to the point where I get jealous when she's with her boyfriend.

I feel like I need to do something soon because being 'the other guy' is starting to drive me crazy. I've considered just walking away and moving on, but I don't want to regret not making a move and going for it.

So basically what i'm asking is...how do I tell her that I want to be with her without it sounding like a ultimatum and pressuring her? Because in my experience, girls react negatively to pressure and will usually just stay with their boyfriend since it's the safer choice.

Your advice is much appreciated!

So..she's cheating on her boyfriend with you...


Chances are, she will do the same to you if you guys start dating. Dont kid yourself about that.

Are you sure you actually like her? I mean, you're already fucking her...So think about it...and if you still feel the need...Then tell her whats up.

Let her know you don't like being in the situation you're in...You're the type of guy that wants all or nothing..and are happy and content with both, so regardless of her answer, you're fine with it.


If shes like "dude, I have a boyfriend..blah blah blah" then just be like well, I enjoy our time together and what not, but if we're not on the same page, then its best if you just go and save both of our time..


Some girls want their cake (decent boyfriend) and to eat it too (fuck other dudes on the side)... If she turns you down, take that cake out of her mouth by setting her straight and proving that you dont need her around...Eventually when her life gets boring again, she'll start thinking about you.....or she'll find another guy to cheat on her boyfriend with.

If she agrees with you and wants to be your girlfriend, then thats great. And its always a possibility, so definitely go for it if you are sure about it.

Thats the best I can advise...but do keep in mind....and note that not ALL girls are like this...cuz some do learn their lessons...but if a girl cheats on her boyfriend to be with you, it is very likely that she will cheat on you as well....so really think whether or not you want to take a chance dating a girl that you already know is a cheater..

Good luck dude