Hi all. I have just joined the forum for some advice on this topic.

I have been best friends with a woman for about 10 years and we are really close. We live in different towns in the week and we spend our spare weekend-time together.

We trust each-other and talk about things only the two of us know. We are very tactile and always gives eachother a warm hug, smile and a kiss (sometimes very close to my lips). When her BF aint around.

She always invites me out if there is an event or concert and I do the same. And when we txt each-other she always puts "love you loads xxx" or something similar.

Now this is the tricky bit. She had a messy breakup with her boyfriend of 4 years not so long back and recently got with another chap about 4 months ago soon after on FB.....(possibly on the rebound)

I've been getting alot of signs from her. One example is when I found out she is with her new boyfriend I made a big step and said "I was gonna ask you out on a date" and her reply was "well you should've Mr." and we joked about it, just like we joke about being married together. Another example is when she said to me "You had a chance a while ago"...and then when I started to feel a bit deflated she said quietly "There's nothing stopping you", and this was when she is still with her new boyfriend.

When were alone the conversation gets REALLY graphic and we make ourselves laugh alot, but I aint sure whether it is a friendzone topic or genuine sexual tension. We talk about anal, and fetishes, we also drop inuendos to each other when her BF is around and he ain't gotta clue what's going on.

Last year she was single and heartbroken. I took her out to dinner and she suggested a strip club and a hotel room. I chickened out and turned her down because I didn't want to take advantage of her situation at the time.

This new years eve she said that I was very fit but doesn't want her personal problems (drugs and debt) to ruin my career or goals in life. Is she teasing me or is she protecting me? She talks to me about other blokes and her ex looking for approval or advice and shit. Aint interested in them and I usually ignore her or turn away when she does.

Here's a twist. She is still with her boyfriend and i'm still friendzoned, but i'm gonna break contact with her this weekend and try and keep her wondering. Later this month i've offered to take her to a gig and I said she can sleep round my house. Only got a single bed and I said i'll sleep on the couch. Her response was "Don't worry, i'm not gonna lavish you...........well!...".

Just want some advice on getting her. I'm serious about her but don't want to be her fake gay-bestfriend all my life when she's fucking other blokes.

Any help please?

Uh be her friend.. Is she your only option? Can you not get with any other women? Keep a friend, and just move on to another woman. Guys act like little girls about things like this. Just keep her as a friend. And really be genuine about it, treat her like she is one of your boys. DONT try and escalate anything with her. Treat her like a guy and maintain a solid friendship with a female. There is nothing wrong with that. Not ever girl has to be turned into a fuck toy. There are plenty of other women for that out there.

And why do you want to be with a woman with a drug and debt problem? Do you care anything about your own future?

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She aint my only option and I do meet other women. The thing is, i'm serious about her and just want to get out of the friendzone and into relationshipzone.

And her personal problems was from her past BF who dragged her down. She aint an evil person, just somebody who had a bad experience in life and learnt a valuable lesson. And i'm willing to help her sort things out.

I hate this friendzone shit. I meet other women and some of them are much more good looking than her but I can't her out of my head.....it's driving me crazy.

So shes just an inoocet little girl that was just a victim of bad boyfriends? Bullshit..


Honestly, do you ever loan her money or pay for things for her? be honest

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She aint innocent. Nobody is!

I dont give her money or anything. I might buy her a few drinks when we are out but that's as far as it goes.

You could do the traditional, freeze out for a week and then reengage contact being extremely sexual.

Or Build up the sexual tension more, and just make the move.

Either way is risky and its either you get the girl, or you never see her again because its too awkward.

Either way, you move on with your life.