OK, So I took the girl I've been gaming out wednesday night.



We went for a bite to eat in a cafe and then on to about four different bars. We had a lot of fun. Obviously were comfortable around each other since I've k closed her for about 5 weeks now, but this was our first official 1 v 1 date.


By the last bar we were both pretty drunk and openly k closing in the bar. She asked me to take a picture of us reflected in the mirror...

I think my game was pretty solid, she said she always compliments me but I seldom do her, I just smiled and said 'Im a bit closed like that'

She mentioned that I would 'get on really well' with her parents/brother...I thought this was an IOI in terms of getting into a relationship?

Anyway things had gone that well I was REALLY tempted to ask her out officially but I read the situation and felt that it was too soon to do this - We've been out with mutual friends about 8 times now in the last 5 weeks, k closing each time...but I felt that A) I hadnt fucked her yet and B) 1 good date alone would be too soon.



FAST FORWARD TO FRIDAY NIGHT...


My parents and brother were away friday night visiting some family friends before christmas...knowing we were both going out that night I saw this as a chance to get her back to my place and escalate things further....

After k closing again friday night I asked her 'what do you want for breakfast saturday morning?' And she actually laughed and gave an answer.


So, I F closed her friday night/saturday morning.... Im very pleased to get things sexual because it means I'm alot less likely to get friend zoned and she is clearly attracted to me.

My main concern now though is getting things to be 'official'; when we got back to my place drunk I asked her about us 'going out' etc...what exactly our status was:


She said that she likes me but mentioned something about her last ex boy friend from about a year ago...that she had never been dumped by anyone but he dumped her....I didnt keep pushing her on this because it sounds basically as though shes been hurt... I've also heard off a mutual friend that the guy was basically not into her as much...


My question is....how long should I keep things casually sexual and dating with this girl before I expect us to be an item?

Hi Glad to hear you are making progress...

She clearly likes you dude and the fact that you have had dates and sex will keep you out of the friend zone. To answer your question; if you want to become an item failry soon you can reassure her that you are not like her previous relationship. Explain that you are into her and tell her your true feelings.

In terms of how long you should keep things as just casual sex is entirely down to the two of you. If she doesnt want to rush into a new relationship immediately then i guess it is ok to keep things as they are. Have dates with the girl and just take things easy and see how things go between the two of you....

I think perhaps your over thinking slightly I would just take it day by day and see how things go. I think that if you gave things a bit of time she would definetly become your next gf as she clearly is comfortable physically with you and also opening up to you.

Hope that helps

_________________
"Let your dreams be your pilot,
your imagination your fuel..."

Thanks man. That really is reassuring.


Another update...

She was going to a gig here the other night with some mutual friends, I wasnt going but was travelling through the same area of town anyway to go to work.


She asked me to come meet them so I did for drinks. The group was her + a female friend and about 5 of males including me.

Pretty soon me, her and her girlfriend (plus this girl's BF) went to get food in a restaurant...it was fun and she held my hand under the table for a while. Afterwards I said my goodbyes to go to work, and we kissed.


She came to my house last night when my parents and brother were in. We sat in my room for about 4 hours watching TV and making out.


I tried to initiate sex again but its her time of the month so no go. We are gonna meet up again on christmas eve with our friends (who are in a long term relationship together) and go for some food then to a few bars.


We all sort of live in a similar student area of town, and a few of us are going to a pub on christmas night. She lives closer to a different pub and asked me to go there....I think I'm gonna try and hit both pubs.



So...things are going considerably good SPAM....I am falling for her a bit I think...but it seems mutual.



I know I shouldnt have done this but I doubled checked who her ex bf was on facebook because I remembered his name... he's sort of in our circle of friends but also in a different circle... he looks like he may have a high status etc... how can I be sure that her reasons for not going 100% official with me are because either.....


A) She is scared of getting rejected/hurt again (Good reason)


B) She still is into this douche/hoping he rekindles things (Bad reason)


They broke up about a year ago, but still communicate.

Hi dude I think that she just doesn't want to rush things that's all so the answer would be A lol. My friend was in a similar situation to this (where an ex was in roughly the same social group) and he had nothing to worry about!!!

Hope that helps again lol

_________________
"Let your dreams be your pilot,
your imagination your fuel..."