It`s been an impossible situation with this girl all along, we didn`t get together for a long time and mostly bcs of me-when I could make it happen, i didn`t.. Anyways, things got really bad and to the point when she started to get all cold.. And i think that it`s bcs, among the other reasons, that she sees me as some player who hooks up with another girl on every party or every time i go out. But she wants a loyal tralala bf... So.. Is it a good idea that i reframe to her and tell her that I`m not like that at all? Or it would be even worse, bcs that would mean that I kind a "lied" to her or try to prove her smth back then when we started this..?
_______________

_________________
There are no lesbians, just women who never met Sid.

hey there, i used to have the same problem. she said that i was a player or so because there are always girls around me. it didn't work out with me and her because after she wanted to be in a relationship with me which i didn't accept, she started going out with other guys and changed a few boyfriends. she was a little cold but i can see where this is going. i regretted it a little but i figured out i should move on.

but back to your problem, you should give some space. don't keep texting her or calling her. it annoys people, it really do. get over her, don't even go near her. if you both have a same circle of friends, don't go to same events with her for awhile. you might be chilling with your friends and not noticing her but she will feel that you are stalking her or whatever.

give it some time, engage only when you know that you can get girls better than her, come back into her life as another person, better than before. let her think is this the man i didn't take back when i had the chance?

good luck man

Thanks, useful advice ) Well, I`ve done that.. I haven`t talked to her for almost 3 weeks, only when we met I just said hello. And we weren`t on any event together..
Though, this friday, we talked a bit and she said she is going to some event the same evening and I told her that I will be there with friends too.. Nothing more, and then on the "event", my friend (he`s dating her best friend) told me, they aren`t coming, bcs they don`t have a ride.. The next day we talked through phone after a long time, just some random stuff (she was asking questions a.k.a leading). And then we got to this situation we`re in now.. And I said if she is cool with this we have now (not talking, just hello sometimes etc.) and she said that it would be cool if we would know why is that so, but if it would be normal it would be okay.. A little note her-I stopped talking to her, bcs we were out one evening with friends, I isolated her, we had a great time, we held hands and all that, but I didn`t made the KC, only on cheeks.. And then the next days, she was acting like I killed her mother or smth.. Weird.. One thing that I thought why she is like that, is bcs I gave her a bracelet, like a present or smth, and then when we saw each other the next day I told her to give it back to me, bcs she wasn`t wearing it.. Is that why she is acting like this?
But i don`t understand what she meant with that sentence..

_________________
There are no lesbians, just women who never met Sid.

what did you do that anyway? you asked a present back? that is like..

had you tried calling her again? is something doesn't work out, you can ask her. its okay to ask. but if she does not give a answer, don't go all needy and keep asking her. in my opinion, she is confused. is she seeing anyone else at the moment? she might be using you. but i don't know cause i don't know her in person but be careful.

or, she might be having buyer's remorse. it may be a little peck on the cheek but since she regards you as a player, she might feel slutty by letting you kiss her. i know, its stupid right?

she is definitely attracted to you. give her some time. also consider backing out and reengage when thing are more stable. this show that you are not needy. but also be there when you need her. in a nutshell, be nice to her but not needy.

Vassion.. GREAT post, thanks.. Finally someone who understands or tries to understand )
I know, a stupid thing.. I wasn`t even thinking..
Well, not really.. Bcs we had those situations before once, when she was acting all weird after we hooked up somewhere.. So I was kind a pissed and left her alone.. As far as I know, she`s not seeing anybody. She is confused probably yes, but I don`t know what I`m doing "wrong"..
I know what you mean and I`ve been thinking about this. She is VERY concerned what others will think and that her friends will see she is seeing somebody and so on..

Well.. I backed out completely for like 2-3 weeks.. But I think that I kind a blew it with asking her out somewhere in the middle of this "freeze-out"... I mean, all that turned out kind a needy.. or not, i don`t know..
She is attracted, but she is acting SO weird all the time. I don`t know if it`s bcs of me or I don`t know what.. But she has some serious issues from childhood (no, shes not mentally retarded) and she doesn`t let nobody so near to her. She has 1 very good friend, and me.. She doesn`t like to open up to people, so maybe that`s the issue..
Do you think that it`s cool that I "approach" her this weekend and talk to her etc.?

_________________
There are no lesbians, just women who never met Sid.

Oh, and one more thing.. I sent her a short message after a long time, and she wrote back cold.. Like nothing`s there..
I really don`t know where the fuck I˙m with her..

_________________
There are no lesbians, just women who never met Sid.

yeah i know i'm great

try not to leave a girl alone. it shows that you're angry and its a DLV

but don't worry bout that thing for too long. if this is really what screwed up, it means your relationship with her is fragile. to be in a healthy LTR, (in my definition at least) both parties should be able to handle screw ups, or minor ones at least. if she can't handle this, it means you will have a even harder time being with her in a LTR.

sometimes i get needy and seek validation from girls. that urge man, its hard to control. but you have to control it. i don't care whatever method you use, just find away to control it

when a girl sends something back short and cold, they're tons of reason that can cause that. and lets not relate it to ourselfs. i could list a hundred reasons seriously. i used to ask girls i spent time with why did they reply my messages late. they said there were busy, having their m's, doing their homework, phone out of credit, and tons of other crap so don't worry bro.

we absolutely see some attraction going on here. think something, how long have it been since you replied a message without thinking what the receiver will interpret it as? whenever we send a message, we think about how the other person will think about it. how will they feel or how will think think about us.

so do girls

you should meet her this weekend. meeting up will give you a clear picture of what she thinks of you.

but whatever you do you have to remember that this relationship will end somewhere. it might be a few weeks later after you met a better girl or maybe 50 years later when you die. (getting off topic here )

so whatever you do, remember its not the last. you have to crash and burn in order to understand the game properly.

good luck bro

Hehe
Huh, It sure didn`t do any good.. But she was acting so weird then, and it`s hard to look at that so i decided to leave her alone for a while. And she saw me walking with another girl today..
I hope that she will come to this "event", so we can finally hang out..
Crash and burn yes!
Thanks bro )

_________________
There are no lesbians, just women who never met Sid.