What happened here?



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 Post subject: What happened here?
PostPosted: Mon Oct 17, 2011 3:57 pm 
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I've been gaming this girl for a while now, and while I haven't been able to f-close up to this point, I always felt that I was slowly but surely heading toward it.

I was out having some drinks with a few friends the other night and as the night was winding down, I shot her a quick text asking her to meet me for a late night drink (it was way past midnight at this point). She's at home hanging out but sure enough, she's game and we bar hop around town.

Now the entire time we're out, she's fully accepting my kino . We're holding hands, dancing with each other, etc.

Anyway, at the end of the night we go back to her place and at this point, i'm thinking now is my chance to finally pull the trigger. Unfortunately, we're way too drunk and end up passing out. We cuddle/spoon throughout the night but nothing happens.

The next morning, the cuddling continues and i'm thinking 'okay, time to make my move.' Well low and behold she starts caressing me pretty aggressively (on my back, chest, etc.) So I take this a sign that she's ready, so I start caressing her back. But as i'm going for the kiss she stops me and says 'No Way!'
This throws me way off my game as I thought I saw nothing but green lights. I mean, it wasn't even a turned cheek, but a straight up verbal 'No'. I try to not act effected and we continue to cuddle/spoon until I have to leave for work.

So what gives? I've kissed closed her before (few weeks ago), so i'm wondering why the sudden resistance. The only thing that I could think of is maybe she's on her period (she mentioned earlier in the night that she had tampons in her purse). But even though, would that constitute a rejected kiss?

All this has got me worried that i'm in the friend zone, but if I was, why would she hold hands, cuddle/spoon with me?

What should I do with this girl? Act like nothing happened and just continue to game her? Freeze her out?

Your thoughts are much appreciated!


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 Post subject:
PostPosted: Mon Oct 17, 2011 10:20 pm 
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id probably leave it tbh and move on, or at least leave it a while and then have another crack at it.


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 Post subject:
PostPosted: Tue Oct 18, 2011 12:06 am 
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That's weird.. I mean, maybe she's one of those girls who just likes to take things slow. Maybe she rethought the first kiss and wants to wait a bit before she takes it more serious.


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 Post subject: Re: What happened here?
PostPosted: Tue Oct 18, 2011 5:09 am 
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Joined: Mon Oct 03, 2011 2:26 am
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Quote:
All this has got me worried that i'm in the friend zone, but if I was, why would she hold hands, cuddle/spoon with me?
I've never known a girl to cuddle up with me like that if she wasn't interested.

She was prepared for your kiss attempt and immediately rejected it which means she had been thinking way ahead...to sexual stuff which she wasnt prepared for, either because she was on her period or she thinks she doesnt know you well enough or she doesnt think she's clean down there.

The thing to remember is that their decisions aren't rationally based, so if you keep working her up with the level of kino you have available at your disposal, she will get hotter and hotter until eventually giving in or verbally admitting what her problem/reason is. Usually the reason is period, in which case you can still get her into some kind of oral, or just tell her you're cool with it and get a towel haha


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 Post subject:
PostPosted: Tue Oct 18, 2011 7:57 am 
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could be a zillion things,

next time try to create more tension, touch releases tension, joking releases tension, talking releases tension, laughing releases tension, strong eye contact, intent, make her think you will kiss her then do not, don't give her what she wants let the tension build and build, eventually should be easier, think of having sex with her while being silent, create more challenge, let her know there is something she can't have, something you want her to have, pretend it is unattainable, keep creating challenges, blame every escalation on her, let her know it is her fault for what is happening, create more challenge and resist


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 Post subject: Re: What happened here?
PostPosted: Tue Oct 18, 2011 7:54 pm 
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Joined: Wed Jun 08, 2011 9:13 pm
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Location: Bel Air, CA
Quote:
The next morning, the cuddling continues and i'm thinking 'okay, time to make my move.' Well low and behold she starts caressing me pretty aggressively (on my back, chest, etc.) So I take this a sign that she's ready, so I start caressing her back. But as i'm going for the kiss she stops me and says 'No Way!'
This throws me way off my game as I thought I saw nothing but green lights. I mean, it wasn't even a turned cheek, but a straight up verbal 'No'. I try to not act effected and we continue to cuddle/spoon until I have to leave for work.

So what gives? I've kissed closed her before (few weeks ago), so i'm wondering why the sudden resistance. The only thing that I could think of is maybe she's on her period (she mentioned earlier in the night that she had tampons in her purse). But even though, would that constitute a rejected kiss?

All this has got me worried that i'm in the friend zone, but if I was, why would she hold hands, cuddle/spoon with me?
It was a major shit test, and sign of disrespect. She probably has some steady guy, so is already fulfilled sexually, but feels unsatisfied in the cuddling department. She used you to get what she wanted, but had no concern for what you wanted.

It was a shit test, as she was feeling you out to see what kind of guy you are. And you showed to be a pushover. She was absolutely ready for sex. And she was turning you on, so that you would be ready for sex, too. All lights seemed green because they were. You're not in the friend zone, but in the wimp zone. She was getting what she wanted, tests you, and rather than going for what you want, you cop out and "respect her". I used to do this a lot, too, until I realized it was a test. She was then turned off by your display of "weakness". Many women do this, so just be aware for next time. :wink:

She was just playing you. You had a great response of acting like you don't care. Perfect. But you stuck around. A waste of your time. You should have immediately left, then, and she probably would have realized you passed the test, and give it to you better than you've ever got it.

If you want to try and recover this (if she's a real fly 8 or higher), then the next time you meet up, go for sex directly. Tell her you won't put up with waiting any longer. If she rejects it again, leave and don't look back.

_________________
Jazzy Jeff: "My love for you is like a river,
Like a summer breeze that makes my soul shiver,
One look from you is more precious than gold,
Let's grab some BBQ and go get busy!"


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 Post subject:
PostPosted: Tue Oct 18, 2011 8:52 pm 
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Joined: Fri Jun 11, 2010 4:15 pm
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Thanks for the advice.

So does it make sense to 'play it cool' with her? IE - don't initiate, be slow to respond to texts, etc.

Or should I just continue to game as normal and act unaffected..and the next time I'm out with her just go for the f-close early?


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 Post subject:
PostPosted: Tue Oct 18, 2011 9:07 pm 
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Joined: Wed Jun 08, 2011 9:13 pm
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Location: Bel Air, CA
Personally, I would have absolutely ZERO contact for a week or two (depending on how much you were in contact with her before all this happened). If she texts/calls you, no response! Then contact her to get together, and don't "initiate early", but actually GO FOR IT IMMEDIATELY!

If you happen to bump into her before you initiate contact, again, IMMEDIATELY move in for the kill. More or less. Don't see her across the street and run up to kiss her, but don't wait for more than five or ten minutes to isolate and start moving.

_________________
Jazzy Jeff: "My love for you is like a river,
Like a summer breeze that makes my soul shiver,
One look from you is more precious than gold,
Let's grab some BBQ and go get busy!"


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