I dated a girl for 6 months and things were great for the first 4 months or so. Then we started having stupid arguments, most of which were caused by me saying something with nothing but good intentions, but her thinking it was some kind of subtle insult. By the time we broke up, it seemed like I was constantly defending myself for things that were not at all meant to be bad. Now maybe this was all just a symptom of other things going bad in the relationship, but as far as I could see situations like these were the main source of the friction between us.

My question is how do you respond to situations like these? Normally Id say something along the lines of "I meant that as a good thing and im sorry if you took it any other way". But most of the time she wouldnt believe me and it would turn into a big pointless discussion. How do you avoid getting dragged into an argument without hurting someones feelings?

Thats called love my friend
It happens to all of us every now and then, if you want a wife you better get used to it XD

I don't think you should be looking for answers for the questions you are asking. You were placed in a situation in which you had to deal with an insecure person who apparently was always playing "defense".

This is not the norm, and from now on, you should aim for women who are a bit more secure and grounded.

Do not take this experience as something you have to deal with. If a woman misinterpret things all the time is either because she's really dumb, or wants to find an excuse to argue with you (or she's really insecure). Either case, do not fall for it.

More confidence, better inner game, more determination. That's how you handle those situations .

Good luck champ.

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I completely agree with bansario. Don't worry about this one man, she wasn't the one for you. The closer she got to you, the more fearful she was of losing you, hence the change in her behavior. She was afraid that you would say something in a negative way because that is how she began to view herself.

Also, she may have thought the same things in the beginning of the relationship, but you may have just been teasing her to build attraction. If you continued teasing her the whole time, and she's insecure, she may have changed her perception of those teases from "he's teasing me, and likes me" to "he's teasing me, what's wrong with me?"

Another thought she may have been having could be that she planned on changing you. All women try to change a man at one point or another, you just have to man up and say no.

i.e.

"I won't say anything now, but I'll get closer to him and change him into what I want him to be." Problem is, she expected it to work and walk all over you. Good job for sticking up for yourself and breaking it off.

Never let a woman take the power like this. You're the man, you lead the relationship. If she doesn't like it, too bad there's the door... and please let the next girl in while you're at it.