| listen, this sounds like something I have familiarized myself with, now tell me if this fits the description,
she is between the ages of 16-24?
she talks to alot of guys/has alot of male friends?
she was the first to escalate the situation, by either touching you, or declaring some sort of interest (ie. giving you a compliment or saying something nice about you) / she is a flirty girl?
when ever faced with some sort of issue that could cause you to stop paying attention to her, she will deny what she has done, to cause this issue to arise?
if the answer is yes to all of the above questions, it is quite possible, you are dealing with a female player!!
she will keep hitting you up, contacting you, she will show some interest and attempt to get you to reciprocate/buy into her frame of flirting or sexting, next thing, if you get direct with her, and the answer is no, she will do everything she can to not lose your interest, she will come up with excuses, she will appologise, she will try to guage what sort of emotional effect she has on you, by saying things like
I like you alot, but blah blah blah excuse for not hanging out,
sorry, please i dont want you to be upset with me etc.
these are the steps you can take to have a chance with this ATTENTION VAMPIRE,
step 1) get direct, tell her in an extremely direct, honest, blunt way, what you want/expect from her and how you feel
step 2) give her a giant burst of comfort, after step 1, you must stop showing interest/kissing her ass, the theme of TODAYS SHOW CHILDREN, is be normal, make her comfortable
step 3) after creating as much comfort as you can during that interaction, give her a day, to hang out, if the comfort was really good, she will agree, try to make it that day, while she is in that state, if later her state of comfort breaks, better chance of her flaking
step 4) if she flakes, but trys to keep contact, you are going to play the indifference card, no more flirting/showing interest, everything is breif, non reactive, polite, but not nice, she has no effect on you, when she starts showing interest in what you are doing/what you have been up to lately, take that time, to say,
I have just been in and out lately, I would love to see you some time, but not today, anyways, I have to go, ttyl
do not contact her, let her contact you, do not invite her out, let her invite you out, if it is one of these
(hey im going to do x on xyz-day, but I might not be able to, would you like to come)
then you are doing something elese
in all of your texting interactions the one thing you want to have in your head, is that her opinion of you, holds no weight, hold that frame when you are presenting indifference, what she thinks of you, absolutely does not matter, make sure your texts reflect this without being rude,
IN SHORT, MOVE ON FROM THIS ATTENTION VAMPIRE, she just wants orbiters on her roster that she can show to her friends, be direct, state what you want, if she does not provide, she is not worth your time
Last edited by pumpington on Fri Oct 07, 2011 8:07 am, edited 1 time in total.
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