Hi guys, I've been lurking and reading threads on PUAF for a short while now and I have learnt much. But still, I am very confused with where I am with regards to this girl, and was wondering if I could get some feedback from those more seasoned than myself. I warn, my story is pathetic and I know very little. I strive to correct my mistakes and fix my shortcomings and become more succesful with women.

The Story:

I met this girl, and we hit it off pretty quickly, we started seeing each other more often and hanging out. For the first two weeks or so, I never seeked her out explicitly and instead hung around my other friends in that area. As she lives in the dorm, whenever she would hear me talk, she would come find me and I would make small talk with her for a bit. After two weeks of this, I decided to ask her if I could take her out to dinner, with her initial response being yes, followed by a no. I am and was not interested in a relationship with her and am merely looking for something casual, and I thought (probably very incorrectly), that this would be a good precursor for that. In hindsight I now understand that that was a huge fail, but anyway. The reason that she said no was because it was apparently 'too soon' as it was only two weeks in and 'she didn't think it was a very good idea'. I accepted it and moved on, not making a big deal out of being rejected.

Since then (it's not 5 weeks in), we have seen each other pretty much every day and hung out together either in groups, or sometimes alone. So far this sounds like I have been quite heavily friend-zoned, but this is where I start to get confused. We lie on her bed and watch episodes of tv shows every weekend, and our conversations often take sexual turns. This girl is a partier, and whenever she gets wasted, she generally calls me to walk her home and to take care of her. Her attitude towards me however, changes when she's drunk: She becomes a lot more touchy feely in the sense that she wraps her hands around my neck and rubs up against me. Likewise, she won't register any of her other close friends (which are arguably closer to her than I am) and concentrates on me. She also likes to touch my face and run her fingers through my hair. I however am not interested in taking advantage of her when she's that drunk and am merely interested in if there is some kind of interpretation you guys could offer me.

TL:DR - Liked some girl, thought she liked me. Asked her out, she said yes, then no because it was 'too soon'. Thought I had been friendzoned, tried to be a good friend. Realised that something casual with her would be awesome. Want to achieve it now.

The Problem:

I thought I had been friendzoned, and thus strove to be a good friend with her, but then I had a change of heart and realised that something casual with her, as a girl who I had good chemistry with, would be great. Likewise, a fair amount of people around her, suspect that she likes me.

Am I friendzoned? Is all lost, or could I still change my tactics to ramp up her interest?

My thoughts:

I am unsure between the two. Part of me feels like I have been friendzoned but likewise it feels like there are still signs there and I might be able to change my behaviour somewhat to fix this.

Any help would be appreciated. Thanks!

no such thing as the friend zone, there is only interest and disinterest, the more interest, the easier it will be, the more disinterest the harder it will be, over escalation leads to projecting neediness and putting pressure on her leading her to believe you are a huge sexual threat, and that leads to buyers remorse (she wont be around you or talk to you), under escalation leads to her placing you in the he is a giant pussy category, and that means good old platonic friends, the more you practise the more you will be able to find that sweet spot and get frequent makeouts and sometimes sex, just focus on making her feel good and horny and make all the first moves, do not logically try to aknowledge what is happening just make it happen ignore everything that is counter productive, she is touching you, that is a clear indication of interest, next time you are alone i suggest kissing her what ever the outcome at least you took a shot, do not regret it, do not appologise, be happy you go for what you want

Too much irrelevant crap.

What do YOU wanna do? You fuck her, right? So hang out with her and fuck her.

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Go hard or go home!

Dude man the fuck up. When she's drunk and touchy you touchy her right back and then kiss her. I've only once met a woman so drunk that I would have been totally wrong to escalate, so odds are great your friend isn't in that case (at least not every night out). When she's drunk she dares to do what in normal state would seem unseemly to her. Just make a move the next time she gets all physical.

As Hank Moody says: A morning of awkwardness is far better than a night of loneliness.

And when the awkwardness comes you chat it out like adults. Preferably by saying you want to see where it goes first and keep it an open relationship in the beginning. It will leave the girl wanting for more.