Recently I have run into a problem, the problem is having a repuation as someone who just uses girls for sex, it could just be a girls emotions speaking and something is comming off wrong to her, but mostly I am suspicious that I am being amoged by more then one person, gossip begins inside a social circle next thing I know had a weird night with a girl I have a oneitus for on wednesday, I was just so sure she was attracted to me, she came over to my house, watched a movie, escalted to cuddling, while cuddling we were just fluffing and she was talking about when we first met, and what i thought of her, and then she said she remembered i said something that made her feel insecure or something do you remember what that was? (she was implieing a neg only problem was i never used MM on this girl was just 100% me, had no intention of gaming her when i met her), next she asked me more community oriented questions i kept playing dumb, we kept cuddling, kissed her twice (lips), she kissed me once (forehead) , would not make out, told me she had a great time, now she is flaky, I used to use MM and i went through this phase of talking about MM and ''the game'' non stop for like 5-6 months, and I assume one of the guys I explained MM to is more less likely trying to CB the shit out of me, only problem is I don't use MM, i barley even follow the theory, I use qualification as it is a great tool to actually find out if a girl is actually worth talking to but mostly, just try to frame myself positively and am open honest and direct with what I want and go for it,

so the question is how do I deal with this repuation as the guy who goes out to bars looking for sex and nothing more?, how could I get a girl to realize that i actually care about her and don't just want to fuck her using some tactic that i would use on every other girl?

this problem lies also within the oneitus i am having, she seems nervous about trusting me, while at the same time, I have tried to get over her by sleeping with other girls and it just didn't work, I still think about her alot and I am worried she has herd through gossip that I hooked up with a one or more other girls and now that perpetuates her anxiety, I have tried just cutting contact with this girl also, but she stayed persistant in contacting me, its like every time I go cold on her, she reaches out for my attention, but when ever I am in pursuit she telegraphs anxiety about me using her for sex, she is at this point flaky, but she still contacts me via text often and attempts to sext, I am very emotionally invested in this girl so outside perspective would be greatly appreciated

Firstly, don't worry about your rep. That's not who you are. If someone deliberately amogs you or talk shit about you being a player, just smile and pretend dumb.

If a girl is not attracted to you then this whole player thing is in your head. it is more appealing for us to say "she doesn't wanna be with cause of my rep" then to accept the fact the she is not into me for whatever reason. And here, there is really nothing you can do.

If a girl is attracted to you, she will at least ask you about other girls and she will want to hear what you have to say about this. I have a long story that i use here, but basically I tell them I don't want to waste my time in relationships until I'm sure she is someone special. After that they either say I see what you mean and stay, or say they don't want to be part of your world and leave.

_________________
I have to return some videotapes...

Even though you say it - I can't agree.
How big chances do you have to hook up with a girl from your social circle if you will be viewed as a guy who is trying to play everyone?
How will you make the girl to feel special if she will be thinking that you are like this with everyone and she is just another one?

_________________
Keep improving every day...

Why don't you address her doubts by taking them head-on?

If she thinks you're a womanizer, just tell her that while "I (you) have been with my fair share of women, none worth holding on to."

What she would hear is that unlike those other women, she is worth holding on to. Look, no woman wants to be a conquest. She wants to know that you value her as a partner.

Emphasise the fact that your past behavior isn't an indication of where you are now.

Once, she starts believing that, there's going to be no more resistance.

Good luck.

_________________
" You're born alone and you die alone and this world just drops a bunch of rules on top of you to make you forget those facts. But I never forget. I'm living like there's no tomorrow, because there isn't one. "