I'm a very passive guy, and I'm also very rational and cannot easily build emotional connections with other people
And no surprise that I've never been in a relationship..(i'm 21)
Not to mention picking up girls


Is there any way that I can change my personality?
Million thanks

There's no overnight remedy. It's a gradual process and it is very much achievable. You must make friends with someone who is gregarious, outgoing, socially in demand and hang out with him as much as possible (in a non needy way of course, just flow and chill and go with the flow.)

You will pick up things subconsciously from hanging out with someone like this and in time you will become outgoing yourself.


You're probably being lazy in social circumstances. You need to become excited. You need to become interesting. How do you become interesting? Ask questions. Listen to people. Comment on what the just said without offering your opinion all the time. Be in the moment. Have presence. Presence is relaxed but attentive and ready for action all at the same time.

A simple yet very effective trick is to say the opposite of what you were thinking you would say. For example when you think white you say black.
But that's just easy, the hard part will be your environment. Chances are great they will not accept your new behaviour so or your change has to be gradual or you'll be exposed. Alpha's in your group will tear you apart when you start to rebel.

I kid you not I was about to make the same post as the OP.

A girl said it to me last night too. I'm very serious and rational... even when I'm drunk

you got any suggestions how to improve?

Alpha's will tear me apart...but I MUST REBEL!
Can't just stay beta and AFC forever
Maybe I shouldn't be too high-profile?