Who gives a fuck if she thinks she has more power over him? He's done with her, worrying about what she thinks about the OP is something the OP should not be thinking about, otherwise he hasn't really cut all ties. I dont see what's proud about not asking for your money back after a few weeks/months either. All he has to do is text her "Hey, money is a bit tight right now, can I get that money I lent you a couple months ago?". Not "When will I see you again?", not " Lets meet up, I worry about your well being" or any other false pretense bullshit. She's obviously done with the OP so meeting under false pretenses like this will make it less likely that she'll respond. However she'd look like a massive scumbag not to reply to a text about returning owed money after months.

That's correct, Visor. At first I was actually concerned about her not responding, but yesterday morning when my friend told me she ran into her on the street tripping face then I stop caring. I can also tell via my cell phone when someone receives a message, so I know it's not cell phone issues.

As you said Visor, I'm not worried about what she thinks of me anymore, especially right now. This is just how she is, I suppose. Let me share details from when I actually dated her. It was an intensive relationship, she put me on a pedestal and we texted/called/SPAM constantly, telling each other everything. When we were together it was basically non-stop sex. When she broke up with me, I had maybe a day or two of any real warning signs, it was seemingly out of nowhere and only a few weeks into the actual relationship. I thought at first she was sleeping with another guy already, but our relationship was technically Open so she could have pursued another one while keeping me on the LDR backburner... but no, her feelings for me basically changed overnight and without real reason. She insisted on being friends, I said no at first. A week later, I said I would try, that night she called me at 3 am and I ignored it. I went no contact for a few weeks, then broke it to invite her to this music festival we had planned. She almost went, but backed up. No more contact for a few weeks after this, then she gets ahold of me to pay a parking ticket I said I would pay back when we were dating and she visited me. Paid it two weeks later. A few weeks after that, is when she came back to school and called me to have dinner with her and her mom. That's about when the whole "FWB" thing started... I figured now with proximity she was interested in a second chance or something, or at least some good sex.

Now she's basically "vanished" again, and I believe in second chances but any after that, fuck that shit. Fool me once, shame on you. I can understand having no response to last Monday's text ("it's nbd maybe I have ulterior motives ") or the mass text friday, but "So am I going to see you anytime soon?" is both direct and nonchalant. The reason I don't give two shits about what she thinks now, is it's obvious that by playing this ignore game so hard she doesn't give two shits about me anyways. She doesn't care about paying me back, or any sort of hanging out, sex, whatever... so I'm done caring about her. Like I keep saying, I just want my money/shit back and GTFO. Maybe there's a tactful way or doing it, maybe not, that's the last advice I want from you guys. Seeing as how this is day 6 of not hearing at all from her, I'm close to just starting to harass her. I'll probably send something nonchalant this afternoon "Hey, Earth to ______, what's going on?" and if that gets ignored too then I'll send a "Fuck you wheres my money" type message, then if that fails then start going through her friends/roommate "hey have you seem/talked to ____ lately?".

Either way, this is just fucktarded to all hell. In the very rare event I've pissed someone off to NC me, I've always gotten at least some decent reason, and a response to when I do contact them. Even if it's "Fuck you leave me alone" or "I don't wanna talk to you" it's still something.

I didn't say about meeting up under false pretenses, just that if she is someone he runs into casually that's as far as I'd go in my attempt to retrieve the money is if we accidentally bumped into each other. Truth be told I wouldn't even do that as I don't consider anything under $100 not worth the effort and aggravation, guess that's where we are different.

Sonny: "What’s the matter with you? What have I been telling you? Sometimes hurting somebody ain’t the answer. Is he a good friend of yours?

Calogero: "No, I don’t even like him."

Sonny: "Well there’s your answer right there. Look at it this way… It costs you 20 dollars to get rid of him. He’s never gonna bother you again. He’s never gonna ask you for money again. He’s out of your life for 20 dollars. You got off cheap. Forget it.”

(A Bronx Tale)
By the way I know it's not $20 but you get the idea.

Lol! That's how I roll. What's a couple of bucks worth in comparison to aggravation nothing in my book and that's also what I mean about pride. I'm too good and my time to precious for that hassle. Which equates to me being prideful and as I said before perhaps too much so.

Well, contact was re-established. I was texting J this morning, and J sent a text to my ex. The conversation as follows:

I probably should have just left a short reply after the first text, but instead decides to just hash it out instead. Whatever, but I wanted you guys to see verbatim what she's like. It may be just me, but I see many signs of BPD in this conversation, but it might just be normal female behavior, you guys can make the call on that.

Her: You will get your 60, stop bitching to my friends about it. I was trying to wait until I got paid back so I could do that, but apparently that's not ok. It will be in your apartment by the end of the fucking day
Me: You could have just said that. The money wasn't the real issue, it was your vanish off the map for the last week. You said you had it Monday, and agreed to pay me back when you got back from break, but you didn't do that. And I only talked to J about it, because she's my friend too.
Her: Well she just sent me a text about it and she keeps telling you to drop it, that she doesn't care, but you won't stop. I said I would pay you back after break, but that doesn't specify a day. I had money, yes, but like I said, I waiting to give you the money from (her friend who owed her money).
Her: And I haven't vanished off the map, obviously I'm still in school
Her: Maybe there just wasn't a point this week that I felt like going down there
Me: Yes, well you didn't say anything about waiting for (her friend) until today. In fact, the last time you said anything this week was on Monday "I have it, you'll get it when you see me"
Her: Exactly. You haven't seen me
Me: Well I'm not a mind reader. What I do know is that since you've been back (to school), neither of us has gone more than a day or two without talking or hanging out, so I figured you were just dropping me and I wanted the score settled before that happened.
Her: Well even if I have to sell myself, that $ will be in your apartment by the end of the day
Her: My life was hell the past week and I was unable to work over break btw
Me: Well how am I supposed to know that if you don't talk to me?
Her: You weren't, that's the point. Nobody is supposed to know anything unless I tell them, and I chose not to tell you. It wasn't any of your business. All you needed to know was that you would get your money, so that's what I said.
Her: Adam (my friend) texted me last week, too - said he wanted to hang out. Have I seen him? No. Have I texted him since? No.
Her: Was I worried when I didn't hear from J for awhile? Yes. I texted/called her every day. When she got her new phone, she texted me n I hung out there the very next night.
Her: But she doesn't even know how hellish my week was. The only people that do are the people that see me/hangout every day, the people who are actually involved in some way
Me: I thought I was one of those people.
Her: Yes, for some things. But you don't have classes with me or see me between classes. You don't eat on campus so we don't eat together... There isn't anything that we are mutually involved in.
Her: The people that know what's going on are the people that experience it with me. It's not that you're not a friend; you are, but you should know by now that I don't tell everybody everything. Hell, I told you that even J doesn't know what's going on, and she's my best friend
Her: I have to leave my group of friends and go out of my way to see you, and when I do, you either try to seduce me or we just sit there and watch tv. You don't even like it when I bring my friends with me! And it's not like I can invite you up to the boys', what would you do?
Me: I know. You can't really blame me for that, though, i don't live on campus or have any classes with you. In fact, I am almost never invited to anything on campus, people only want to hang out at my apartment. But like Jess, the physical separation doesn't mean we aren't involved in your life or don't care when somethings bothering you.
Her: I've been busy, (my name). I havne't had the time to drop everything and run down to you.
Her: You're involved in some things, yes. But I don't have to tell you anything I don't want to. So I'm not. It's that simple.
Me: That's not true. Just because I don't smoke doesn't mean I don't like playing video games, jamming, just talking, etc. And I don't have a problem when your friends come here, in fact that girls night out thing was a lot of fun. I had a problem when Will always shows up empty handed, and expects me to drive him around and feed him unconditionally.
Me: And we don't just watch tv, we cook meals, we got shopping, we hang out with sometimes my friends sometimes yours, we've played rock band, we've went to the bar, all kinds of things. I'm sorry you feel that coming down her is "dropping everything" but it seemed you genuinely liked hanging out, and enjoyed the peace and quit and having a place to stay / someone to cuddle with.
Her: Will doesn't expect anything from you, nor has he ever asked to be fed. As for rides, he asks sometimes but rarely; he has absolutely no problem walking up to his room
Me: And don't act like the seducing thing is all one way, there has been numerous times where sex and staying over was your idea, not mine. As for Will, Sunday before break you asked him to bring food - he didn't. He didn't even bring his weed, which was his premise for hanging out with you. And if he didn't have ae problem walking back to his apartment to get it, he wouldn't have asked me for a ride there seconds after walking through the door, then later even asking (his roommate) to pick it up for him.
Her: The "girls night" wasn't anything like it was supposed to be, so that point is moot. It's not that going down there is dropping everything, but I do have to drop whatever I'm doing to go down there. I can't write a paper with Tina down there, for example, if I'm already doing it elsewhere.
Her: Or if I have plans? There's not usually a way to mix you/your apt in with that
Her: Yea, you could play video games at the boys', but I don't even do that
Her: They don't even jam up there, so I say again what would you do?
Her: He asked Dan to grab it because you said no about the ride. Why did he ask for a ride? Cuz he had JUST walked down from there. If he had walked back up to get it, he wouldn't have come back down. And if I was in the same situation, neither would I
Her: He admitted to forgetting both the bacon and the weed as soon as he realized. Don't even try to make him sound like a conniving ass
Me: Well certainly gave that impression, because IMO if it was important he wouldn't have forgotten both of them, then tried to get other people to get it for him. But whatever.
Her: I HAVE DONE THE EXACT SAME THING many many times (she hasn't)
Me: You know, you never did respond about the last plans we had. The Tuesday before break, when you said you'd probably come over for breakfast. I texted you when I got out of class, then Will called me from your phone asking for my sources for the paper. Then I asked you about it after I got off the phone and you never responded. That's a major sign of disrespect to me.
Her: I still don't have my humidifier at school, even though I meant to get it when I went to my house with Adam. I have forgotten it every time, even though its important.
Her: I told you over the phone that I didn't think it was going to happen, cuz I was already busy
Her: Not paying attention is also a major sign of disrespect btw.
Me: When exactly did you tell me over the phone?
Her: Just like talking about someone behind their back! (ie bitching to jess about me)
Her: I told you the night before that I wasn't sure, and that if it worked out, I would show up. The next morning, I was up the boys, and I told you I didn't know sometime during / at the end of your talk with Will.
Me: You didn't. Will and I only talked about the project, you were never on the phone yourself.
Her: But I have shit to go do so I'm done arguing
Her: Ttyl

I'm sure that some of my responses were emotionally charged, but I tried to remain rational. Some of her points do have a little merit, but as you can tell from my responses that she's mainly twisting things around and avoiding my questions/confrontations. And when I called her out on the OP incident, she ended the conversation, which shows to me that while she may actually have shit to do that she knew she was wrong and avoided it.

Either way, I'm not going to respond until tomorrow, if she gets ahold of me I will get my money back and then just stay the hell away from her. Her friend J (that I was talked to right before this convo started) alluded to the fact that this weekend she had a friend visiting her from out of town. Her and I had talked about this guy before, and she said she was interested in a relationship with him and would be "incommunicado" for at least 24 hours... which partially explains why she didn't respond to my "so am I going to see you anytime soon" text yesterday. She likely slept with him, but that's irrelevant because my mind was made up about her before this conversation and has not changed.

Please give me any thoughts regarding this.

Read the first 5 lines of the text convo, didint bother reading the rest. Looked like it decended into pointless bickering. You dont have to explain yourself or defend yourself.

Her: You will get your 60, stop bitching to my friends about it. I was trying to wait until I got paid back so I could do that, but apparently that's not ok. It will be in your apartment by the end of the fucking day

Me: Kinda need for rent so cheers, that would be nice

No offense, but that played out pretty much like I thought it would. As for her being a BPD I don't think so she's a bit of a bitch, but that's all. lol! From everything you've said about her she's fairly self-centered and her reaction is quite normal for someone like that. She got defensive and it didn't matter whether you made a logical point or not and went on the attack.

I've seen your advice on here and it's quite solid and I think you have a good head on your shoulders and I'm not trying to offend you, but IMO that went all in her favor. She attacked you, your motives and convinced herself of everything she was texting. She basically tried to imply your needy and boring and you let her end the conversation. You should have ended it as it's you whose done with her not the other way around.

IMO texting on your part should have been more like this(that's assuming that you really are done with her)

You: I don't care about your excuses, plain and simple you owe me the money I need the money and I don't have to sit around wasting my time guessing when your going to pay me back. Anything else you say on the matter is moot.

You:(in regards to this guy calling) Who the hell are you to let some guy I don't know like that call my phone. It's my personal number and I give it out to who I choose not you. That's the equivalent of bringing someone over I don't know well without asking me first, it's rude and disrespectful. I demand the same respect I give enough said.

You:(ending the text) I don't care what you have to do to get the money so stop running off at the mouth like I do. I'm done with this conversation, contact me when you've got my money.

You should have avoided the disappearing thing all together, mentioning it just show's your feelings and doesn't help you in anyway. In my opinion doing so just helped her convince herself the things she was saying are true. Like that your chasing her not the other way around and IMO conveyed neediness. You should have ignored her insinuating that your boring and some of the other things she threw at you. You don't have to qualify yourself to her, fuck her.

That's my opinion and how I'd play it, but as I said I'm a cold prideful motherfucker. lol! Which I will say is as much a blessing as it is a curse. I cut women off to easily and with little provocation and I know I've cost myself some good women that way. Again man I hope you don't take offense to what I'm saying as I'm genuinely trying to be helpful.

Visor, logic told me to respond almost exactly like you did... if I was interested in maintaining some sort of relationship with this woman, but I'm not.

Yeah, it's pretty much pointless bickering. I only posted it so whoever reads it can tell me who's the actual crazy one here. Tru asked me to keep him updated on it. I kept up the bickering so I can see all of this in text, so I have specific references if I talk about her to my friends, forums or counselor. Also, I wanted to address the issues while I had her attention, because I didn't want to hash it out in person anymore. The less I physically see her, the better. IN addition, I posted that conversation on psych forums to get some more opinions on the possibility of her having a personality disorder or just "being crazy". Maybe I'm a bit crazy too? Any affirmation I get about this stuff helps me reassure myself that I am not crazy, and that cutting said person from my life will be a good thing in the end. I don't want to end up caving again someday, and if eventually we establish some kind of friendship down the road then I'm armed with information and reassurance so that I can prevent myself from ever having feelings for her again.

Like I said, it's entirely a possibility that in months/years to come, she will call upon me for companionship or rebound sex, and if I'm single I probably won't say no. My friend, Adam, she had a "relationship" with for a few weeks years ago, and he's currently in that category. I'd like to think he knows better than to consider her girlfriend material, but he's young and naive. This girl just happens to fuck her orbiters too, nothing wrong with being on someone like that's good graces

Except those poor bastards don't know that's she not really interested in them. She just wants their attention for her own validation, and throwing the occasional bone will keep them on the hook. In another topic, I posted something she said to me "I can snap my fingers and have (those guys) do whatever I want". The response? What a manipulative bitch. And she is.

I just know that at this point in time, any contact is bad for me. I, for one, am not opposed to maintaining civility/friendship/contact with any of my ex-girlfriends for the reason I listed above. In fact, my first girlfriend was very attractive - after we broke up, we stayed friends/in contact, and 5 years later she had an affair with me over the course of a year. It was some of the best sex I've had in my entire life, but when it began to compromise her marriage, we entered permanent no contact. I have my regrets, but I learned a lot about fidelity and attraction through that experience, and I would do it all over again if I could.

Stig, no offense taken. But as you can clearly tell, I'm definitely only an rAFC at best and this woman brings out the needy/boring in me to a T. Thank you very much for reading the entire text and giving me some good examples, I certainly would have used more responses like that if I was concerned with the power/chase game anymore. But I'm not.

The one point I will definitely agree, and regret I didn't do, was to be the one to end the conversation. In regards to the other guy calling, he already had my number. Hence why I made the topic about AMOGing, I didn't why he would call me from her phone unless that he was just trying to prove something.

Now, if she doesn't return my money tonight, what should I do? I really would like my money and the sheet for my bed back, but if that's all our "Friendship" is worth then I consider it a small price to pay to keep her out of my life. See, she knows I have a great deal of disposable income and doesn't care about actually doing work to keep my friendship. She thinks she "has me". If I text her, I don't know what would be the most effective jab at her. Something like "So full of shit. Don't contact me again until you care enough to pay me back."

In effect, her lack of trustworthiness will show to everyone who knows her, and anyone with half a brain will see through it. The others... well, those poor bastards.

Fuck her, fuck her friends, even fuck J. The farther away I can get from her, the better. A bit of my ego saying "make her feel the loss" but I don't even care. Hence why I wasn't afraid to look needy or anything during my text convo, I just wanted to show my logical points and her reactions to them as evidence of her behavior.

Alright, latest (and maybe last) update. At 708 PM I receive a text from her "Look over by your front door." I do and there's an envelope with my name on it, written on the outside is "Sry I don't have the bedsheet w/me" and there's 60 bucks inside.

Now, rather than have this last connection to her, I text her the following.

"Thank you."
5min later "I don't want to talk, or argue, so can I just pick up the bedsheet tonight and I'll give you back your charger and then we're done."

While writing this she texts "I'm not anywhere near it right now".

At least I got the money. While I do feel relieved, I'm still left a bit... confused. And hurt. I know that leaving an envelope was her way of avoiding confrontation, but with all events transpired since Monday and the text conversation it seemed like I was demonized out of nowhere. THAT right there, is why I feel she had BPD. Its similar to the feeling of when she broke up with me in the first place, how things could seem to be going so damn well where then out of nowhere she convinces herself that I am a terrible person and lays into me. Tell me, really, what have I done besides acting needy to deserve this SPAM? If all it takes is physical separation for her to run, then she's not worth having even as a platonic friend. I suspect that between physical separation (thanksgiving break), having a reason to avoid me (the money), and finding another guy to suit her needs (the out of town guy she was with this weekend) it was more than enough to show her true character. A quality woman, I believe, would have bowed out gracefully, if she actually valued me as a friend and respected me. It seems this girl has been growing resentment for awhile now, shown through the text conversation, and there was nothing I could have done to stop or divert it. If anything, I hope for the out of town guy's sake that he doesn't fall in love with her, because I know that's a pointless endeavor at this point in her life. She compares every new guy to her idolized ex, and once they fail her expectations she emphasizes their flaws and cuts them out. The closer they get, the harder they fall. The guy she dated during the summer was also a recovering addict, and she dumped him because he told her he loved her. I asked about him awhile ago, and apparently he has gone back to his old ways and is a full blown alcoholic now. This is exactly why they say in recovery not to enter any serious relationships.

On a good note, since she came back to school I'm glad that I was able to become FWB with her. When we dated, it was a LDR, so the times we got to have sex were few and farbetween. I've gotten to explore some great sexual times, learned a bit about myself - apparently, I'm into bondage and polyamory. I got better at sex in general, as my foreplay got even better and I finally made a woman orgasm with my hands alone. Also learned more about oral sex, a few times she guided me through it. Of course, I got an attractive partner to practice the things I learned in SGM on as well. Aside from sex, I learned how to give great massages, practicing on her. I got a pseudo-threesome with her and her friend J, and made a couple friends through her. I learned a lot about borderline personality disorder, and about maintaining an FWB relationship with an ex in general. I learned some hard lessons about altruism, power taking/giving, and just women in general. And possibly most importantly, I really got the closure I wanted from the original breakup. I learned what kind of person she is while I wasn't dating her, and what sort of things she did and how she lives her life at school when she's not my girlfriend. I realized my mindset, since the breakup, had changed - I was focusing too much on the relationship aspect and emotions with hooking up / sex, and had some severe hangups about sexually escalating on a woman I wasn't sure I would want to date. Now, I'm (going) back to the mindset I had when I started pickup. When I met her, I already had two solid FBs (one was even hotter than her), a great social life, and not a care in the world. Tons of friends. My only real problem then was my dealing with drug and alcohol addiction - which, actually SHE helped me quit. One of her reasons for breaking up with me (via phone btw) was my drinking problem. I put down the drink I had, snorted the two grams of Ketamine I had been saving for my next visit with her, and vowed to never touch a drink or drug again. Today, exactly 6 months later I am still holding to that conviction, and through therapy have realized my wrongs and all the negative ways drugs and alcohol were impacting my life. I'll never go back, even though sometimes I still have cravings. She was far from the sole reason I quit, but I swore it was the last relationship I would let alcohol damage.

I will just remember the good times we had, the lessons I've learned through my experience with her. Unfortunately, I never got to have a real FFM threesome with her, but I'm not so stuck on it now. If I really want a FFM threesome, I'll just continue my studies in PUA and become the best alpha I can be, and eventually I'll find a partner that's willing to entertain that fantasy. I had a FFM opportunity in the past with two 40 year olds, but declined. Another close call 8 years ago. I've cleaned myself of any "last desires" with this woman, thanks to the support of my friends and everybody who has posted in this topic. Thank you all very much for reading and giving your advice.

Partly, I'm tempted to have a "talk" in an attempt to understand this and maintain civility, but honestly I know it's pointless. I don't think I even care about "remaining civil" or entertaining any sort of future interaction with her, since this isn't the first time she's acted like this and history repeats itself. So maybe she'll come back, we'll become closer again, and then she'll demonize me and drop me again. I can only reassure myself "she's broken, you can't fix her, and the closer you are the more she will hurt me" which will hopefully motivate me to stay away from her. With any luck, getting the bedsheet back or not, she will just stay out of my life, and I won't run into her. I'll ask my friends not to tell me stories about her, or talk about her at all. I just want to erase her from the forefront of my mind.

In the meantime, should I even reply to that text message? I would like my bedsheet back... but it's not that big of a deal. I'd just rather not buy a new one, or give her a reason to contact me in the future. I want to do this while my conviction is strong, I know it's very well possible in the weeks/months to come I may lose some of this convinction and allow her back into my life. I'd like one less reason to do so.

Haven't brushed up on this thread in a while, but quickly skimmed through it. My advice remains the same: keep sarging to forget about her. She's toxic for you.

_________________
Before she can respect you, you need to respect yourself.

Bro, I know how you feel. I had one chick that totally did the same thing to me, sucked out my game totally and made me weak. I think it's because they put you through this bullshit it creates a need to be qualified by them. They attack your pride and self worth and you seek to regain it subconsciously through them rather then yourself. To this day she still has some power over me as the mere mention of her angers me and makes me want to game her and make her feel like I did. Luckily so far I've known better than to attempt it. It's not that she's a master of the game, but I let my guard down and so far I haven't gotten over it despite gaming numerous females and a year of no contact. She's friends with my best friend so despite the no contact I see her on FB all the time on my friends page and we both actually avoid parties thrown by mutual friends to avoid seeing one another.

My suggestion is if it's possible erase all traces of her from your existence. Gifts, pictures and avoid common casual friends for a little while till you get your head sorted. Don't do what I did though which is compromise my life to avoid her. I'm already there and can't seem to fix that and I hate that I've limited myself so much just to avoid her. So don't make the same mistake I did in that respect. I actually think that's the reason she still has power over me, because I'm letting her by limiting where I go.

Go out game hard and forget her, fill your life with as much distraction as possible till your head is straight, friends are crucial to stop you from turning inward and less social. Get out and do shit, travel if possible, treat yourself and reclaim your life. Don't let your head get wrapped up trying to figure what went wrong or trying to understand her, you'll drive yourself crazy so I'd avoid reading up any more on personality disorders. Don't give her a second thought and if she comes to you to trade stuff back so be it. Keep the meeting short and ice cold with as little conversation as possible. That's my opinion.

Stig, thanks for all of your help in this topic as well. It's comforting to hear I'm not the only one who went through something like this, and I'm sorry to hear that erasing her from your life seems impossible. I wish you the best of luck in your own struggle. Have you thought about blocking her on FB? It seems like an easy step, and when I deactivated my facebook it was a good decision that I've stuck to.

As far as erasing this girl from my existence, there's really no ambiguous mutual friends. The only ones I'm at all concerned about, are my friend Nick who after meeting her they became friends on their own, smoking up together, but to me he's a casual friend at best. Nick was the one I invited to have a threesome with her, and she's got a crush on him so it's unlikely she'll stay away from him. However, from talking to him, he wants nothing to do with her outside of a casual fuck if she throws herself at him, and says she's annoying. Either way, not a friendship I'm concerned about losing.

The other one, Adam, is one of my closest friends. Years before I met her, she had a sexual relationship with him for a few weeks, and has kept him as an orbiter ever since. He slept with her again early september and I was worried he was falling for her again, but since then has kept his distance. I actually talked to him on the phone today for awhile about her, and all this, and warned him to keep his distance and should he interact with her then to keep me out of it, and not even talk to me about it.

The other "friends" I've made through her are really acquaintances at best, and none of them are people I'd want to be real friends with. I'm sure I'll run into them around campus, and be pleasant and say hi, but otherwise not interact with them. If any of them ask me about her, I'll just say we went our separate ways and leave it at that.

Friends aside, I have no classes with her, no clubs or activities, and almost never run into her without it being a planned interaction. Her dorm is a block from my apartment, and I have a class with her roommate, but that's it. Otherwise, I'll ask my friends who know her to not bring her up, so I don't have any other reasons to think about her or talk about her.

I disagree with the advice to "game hard", though. I will eventually, but right now I just want to focus on my own physical and psychological health and my own social life.

All I'd like to know now is what I should do/say about the bedsheet or if/what I should respond to her last text. I would like it back, at least so I don't have to buy a new one.

I havent checked in for a bit. I was busy this weekend with an HB9 who needed some attention

i think you did well. You definitely didnt need to drag out the text battle like that but whatever, its over anyways so who gives. You got your money and that's what matters.

Her keeping the bed sheet is just a really bitchy way to string you along and keep you under her control. As long as she keeps that sheet you will be thinking about her in some way. I wont be surprised if she fights you like crazy to not give it back. She'll be miraculously "busy" and cant come give it to you. If that is the case, I'd rather SPAM you 30 bucks to go buy yourself a new bed sheet then waste any more of you life on this girl.

Keep working out and working on yourself mentally. You are doing great and I can tell the personal growth you have gained has been life-changing. Congrats man

Yeah, I've decided to just drop it. If she's gonna get it back to me, she can contact me. I do have a phone charger of hers in the car as well. Next time I'm out I'm just going to buy a new sheet, seriously that one has so many... stains... on it, and doesn't even match the rest of my bed.

One less thing. All I'm really upset about now, is that it didn't end with more civility/grace. A simple "I'm seeing someone else now, so we can't keep having sex" would have been fine, instead of this brutal attacked over my perceived grievances.

Notice how even in the text conversation, she still thinks of me "as a friend". I don't care, she can believe what she wants. Maybe she thinks it's just a bad time, that's its been hard lately, and I'll go back to showering her with attention and gifts. Nope. As you can see from the text conversation, she's blowing up at all the things she didn't like about me, and that was enough for a final nail in the coffin. Just... done. Good luck replacing me, since you didn't respect me in the way you dropped me then I'm out of patience giving you any more chances back in my life.

Tru, I know you and others have said don't even fuck her, but if for some reason she throws herself at me again, I'm going to get it on film. I've even considering having Nick over and texting her "hey Nicks' here, we were wondering if you were up for some fun" and then get THAT on camera too. I'm sure a tape of a girl getting pounded by two dudes could be some serious leverage potential >:D That's seriously the only possible interest I'd have in her anymore, a pure fuck buddy - you know, where the only thing you do together is just sex? But don't worry, I'm certainly not going to put any of my time or energy into it. I've well beyond convinced myself that any energy spent caring about her is a waste, I only see her as a sperm receptacle now and that's where she shall remain. I don't care about any "can't we be just friends" type talk, like she does with her orbiters - "no, we've tried that and it doesn't work. We're either fucking, or not speaking." and IMO when dealing with a toxic ex that's exactly where you gotta keep her. Hate fuck the shit outta em, then kick em to the curb.

I've got my money back. No more wasted thoughts. No more hanging out. No more text convos. Anything she does to text me, I will be abrupt and uninterested unless she's overtly throwing herself at me.

Wish me luck. I'll post back if I have any more interactions with her, or in a week or so just to rant on how I'm doing.

didnt read all the posts... but from your first post i can tell you that your making a mistake taking a younger girl so serious.... shes 23 and your competing with a 19 year old? get outta here brah. I would never take a girl so young that serious, she doesnt know what she wants yet... stick to 26+ if your looking for something serious.

If all you want is is to fuck , then fuck her and dont worry about what she does or says after that.

Dont stress yourself and find yourself a good girl that wont bring so much drama to your life, its too short brah.