Alright thanks. I did respond to her, I said "Totally understand. Ain't nothing wrong with that. I'm gonna get some sleep. I'll give ya a call here in a couple of days."

I kinda froze up and didn't know what to say it took me 45 minutes to think of any thing to say. Normally I'd apologize for some dumbass reason, so fighting to find something that didn't sound like I was apologizing. I'm gonna call her probably Thursday and see if she wants to go bowling. Pretty nervous because I suck at phone calls. Oh well if I fail, on to the next woman. I will be good at it one day.
Thanks for the knowledge guys. I'll look at that link here in a bit.

Salute.

Make that call man.

And for future reference you don't have to do the "couple of days" thing. Focus on maintaining the chemistry. You could of said.. "alright I'm hitting the bed. Text me in the morning "

And still called her the next day or in a couple days if you felt like it. Take the risk, make your mistakes and improve though bro. You're on your way.

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Theres no need to have text or phone conversations.

Call when you want to hang out.

Text randomly. Like an insurance agent sending out mailers. No need to respond... but when you need insurance, you know who to call.

You're the guy who she calls when she needs dick. Not her bed time story teller.

Huh. That's a really interesting take. I thought she was being kind of bitchy, implying that the OP expected her to be "chained to her phone." You say she's qualifying herself by giving a reason. You may be onto something. Nice.

What you will learn as you develop your game is that guys that get girls tend to view and interpret everything a woman does for their own benefit. Assuming attraction works. And assuming period with women works. If you're frame is strong enough they will take on that which you assume they will.

The guy that says " She hates you man, she doesn't like you" is more often than not a guy who is accustomed to receiving that energy from women. He can only tell you his experience.

The guy that says " I think she digs you" is more often than not a guy that women dig. He's seen these situations and they've worked out for him.

We all speak our reality. A mans interpretation will often tell you a lot about his personal life experience. And this why surrounding yourself with successful people will in turn help you become successful. You'll begin to take on their interpretations and their perspectives.

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Alright so I'm gonna call that chick tonight after work. My anxiety is already kicking in. Getting nervous as hell. I don't really know how to go along with this. I'm going to make the call, I just don't know for sure how to handle it. When I call her, what should I open up with? I know she's from the country so once she says something, if she has an accent I might tease her about it, but if not I might say something about how I imagined she would have a funny accent. Either way I'm going to try to ask her to go out Saturday night. I don't have a problem with asking women out. Just how to build attraction in person or by phone. It's my complete weakness.

when actually talking to her, lead the conversation, don't make it feel like an interview, poke fun at her, and if we go on that date try to make body contact and do the same. Does that look about right?

When you learn to effectively build attraction through the phone you won't actually have to go on dates anymore. Just be aware of that. I'm not sure if anyone else can attest to this but you can go from getting a number from a girl in person or online, calling her or skyping her and then inviting her right over to your house.

My first date is my phone call. My second date is my phone call or video chat (if needed). Once comfort and attraction is established a woman will pretty much bend to your will.

Just give it a crack man. You won't say what you plan to say, because you can't control her responses. Just give it what you got. If you can start off with a teasing joke, that will be great. But you have to train yourself to no longer feel anxiety while making these calls and the only way to do that is to get comfortable with the idea that you could fail.

What the hell is there to be anxious about anyway? Whats he worst that could happen? Her saying no? Would that be your first time hearing the words no? NO!

I wrote an article called 'Take Control of Your Emotion'. Look it up. It will help.

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"When you learn to effectively build attraction through the phone you won't actually have to go on dates anymore. Just be aware of that. I'm not sure if anyone else can attest to this but you can go from getting a number from a girl in person or online, calling her or skyping her and then inviting her right over to your house. "
I couldn't do the quote deal for some odd reason. on this I can see this to be totally true. I'm a manager for an Oil Company, I have a Area Manager that is over me and we work together in the same office. He NEVER goes on dates. Just talks to them, they come over and he gets laid. It's unreal how he does it. I've been trying to hang out with him more away from work just to kinda see how he does it. These women will come over at any time, even if they have to work, they'll come over and leave at like 2am just to make it back. I've tried to kinda talk to him about it, but he really doesn't ever respond.

and I'm not scared of her saying no. I like to be prepared for anything so what you said about I can't control what she'll say is probably the part I have trouble with. If she says no its not a big deal, I've had plenty of rejections, probably more in the last month then I have all my life. It's the ability to respond quickly and accurately to the women that gets me because I can't predict what they'll say. However just talking about this has helped calm me down a lot.

Exactly.

I personally feel courting is for the stone age. Unless a woman makes a strong enough impression on me on that first phone call there is no way I'm headed out with her. She's coming over or we just won't talk. Thats the secret man.. You have to be willing to stand your ground and accept nothing less than what you want. Kindly, not aggressively or angrily. Be kind, and be loving, but be strict. Stand your ground man. You'll lose some in the process, but you'll lose some no matter what, so it makes no difference.

There is the secret. And no everyone is articulate and not every KNOWS how they're doing what they do. It takes a level of self awareness and thats what makes this forum special.

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So how would you try to get her to come over? I was just gonna meet her in the city and hang out.

I tell her to bro.

I met this kid named Max growing up. As I got to know Max he ended up showing me an a few other guys the sex videos he had on his laptop. He had about 75-100 videos of women giving him blow jobs and having sex with him. Max was average looking, and he didn't have much money; he was interning for a popular magazine at the time.

So one of the guys asked max " How do you get them to do it? ", Max said " Do what?" The guy goes " Let you record them ". Max laughs and says "Oh its easy. If they don't it, I just stop talking to them". And that was it.

Not very articulate. But he understood the principle of having a willingest to walk away if your standards aren't met. And because he was willing to walk away from any girl who wouldn't get on video for him, he rarely had to.

Speak with conviction. Mean what you say, and tell her what you want her to do. You can't be wishy washy about this, you have to believe that you're worthy of her doing what you tell her.

What most men don't know is, femininity naturally has to submit to the will of masculinity. Its nature. But only the masculinity that knows his power. You have to be worthy. And the chosen are made up of those that choose themselves.

And once again, all of this is said in a kind, loving, yet confident and assuring tone. You have to believe it first. And for some that came naturally because of their upbringing. Other had to develop it. And you develop it by walking away from enough women who don't treat you the way you believe you deserve to be treated that it becomes second nature. You know longer have to walk away, because they can FEEL intuitively and based on your tone that you will walk if your standards aren't met. They feel it because you've done it so many times before and all your mannerisms sub communicate that you mean what you say.

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Ok so would you even say going out and meeting her in the City would really be a waste of time and just use the phone call as the "first date?" Then from there build on to have her come over?
Or if this conversation goes well say something lIke "You should come over and hang out." How would you word that?
my inner nice guy is fucking screaming at me now. Everything I thought on how to get women is way wrong. Sucks I wasted so many years doing it the wrong way.

Well Sparton,

I've breaking down the high level / basic nature level science for you.

The truth is, at your current level it is likely that this call will just act as a stepping stone for you to have the fortitude necessary to pull it off in the future.

I've been doing this for years. I've always felt entitled to pussy. I just grew up that way. And I was raised around people who shared the sentiments that I have now.

You'll have to work yourself there, but this is a great first step to getting there.

The question for you is, what is it that you want? Do you want to be amazing with women or just decent. Do you just want to find one girlfriend, start a family and settle down, or do you want to sleep with lots of women?

If you want the girlfriend/wife family in the next few years thing, the advice may not be for you. That guy would be better off just going for the casual date around the city.

But if you're looking for something to say it doesn't matter. Its not about what you say its about HOW you say it. I can say "fuck you" to a girl and get a positive reaction, and you can say "fuck you" and get slapped. Its all about how its delivered.

Deliver your request with love, certainty and confidence. If she objects ask her about it. Talk to her about why she's saying no. Get to the bottom of it. Is it comfort, is it fear.. Talk to her about her emotions. Make her feel comfortable with the idea. Work it out. Her first objective will likely be a test. Persist just a bit more.

And this is all after at least 20-30 mins of conversation of course. Thats not going to be your opening line.

This is a lot to explain on a forum though man. A lot of this stuff would have to be consistently and repetitively be worked into your mind.

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I do want to get married at some point. but not right now I just want to get with as many girls as possible, I've wasted a lot of time, and I've always had the traditional talk to one woman thing. After reading all this stuff, screw that. Even if I do find a girl that I think is the one, even that Could end.

But on this phone call I'll just see how it goes. I might just do a small meet up in the city (I actually want to go bowling so that's why I'm saying go to the city), work on how to talk to them and go on from there. One day I'll be able to get them to come over with no problem. Might not be today or tomorrow, or hell even next month...it will be within a year though!

Thanks for the advice man. Just reading all that what you wrote helped get my mind set right. Ready to make that call after work now for sure.

This