She asked to borrow money..



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PostPosted: Tue Jul 29, 2014 6:41 pm 
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My understanding is you were needy and she had the upper hand in the relationship thus her ballsy move to ask you for money.

Some people aren't comfortable making out when there's a third wheel around and generally the people that do push for a kiss and continue to push for it(as you did) only do so for a high dose of validation especially on front of a friend to demonstrate your relationship with this girl. It says the person who is bothered and wants to be kissing the other person on front of friends and others in the group is simply doing it as a means to soothe their ego and be more secure around possible threats or for bragging rights.

Personally I don't like kissing when I have friends around. Why? I don't need the validation and I don't like making those around us feel uncomfortable or left out. If i'm seeing a woman and all we do is stuff behind closed doors it's nothing to me if we don't do anything in public such as holding hands or whatever because I know she's talking about me to her close friends(Every woman does this regardless of who you are or what you've done) so it's known generally that you're scoring. Generally if a girl gets needy and wants to be kissed i'll put my finger to her lip, tell her to calm down and keep my friends involved without feeling like they're being locked off from me while i'm tongue tied with some random chick. This shows the girl you're not afraid to be seen with her or have others know she's yours but you're not letting your friends down and making them feel awkward. It also gives you dominance as you're the one saying "No. Not right now." You're calling the shots.

What you did was get needy and, in my opinion, were a bit of a dick around your mutual friend. You were going to put your friend in an awkward position where he or she would have felt like a third wheel and totally unwelcome. If someone you're seeing doesn't like PDAs chances are you lost a lot of value in her eyes because you came across as needy and insecure in your persistence to kiss her. You should have just calmed down, waited a while and waited to make out with her at the end of the night or date or whatever it is you were doing or even grabbed her to the side to "tell her something" then kissed her to get your fix. Keep in mind that if you can't respect your friends who look up to you then you're not displaying alpha qualities. It takes a weak man to play on the weak in order to look good but if you can look good and be admired by the weak and strong you're a strong alpha male yourself. Keep your friend involved and make her wait. She'll begin to wonder and get needy plus she'll respect you more.


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PostPosted: Tue Jul 29, 2014 6:42 pm 
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Learn to draw healthy boundaries with people. Figure out what's acceptable and what's not for you and act from there.


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PostPosted: Wed Jul 30, 2014 4:01 pm 
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Quote:
Well update...

So far she has not started contact with me since her request..5 days..
To which I responded to with sorry but no....excuse..etc. She responded nicely when I turned it down
Since then I have felt no reason to contact her, I don't see the point of it..it doesn't put me in a good position
Maybe I won't/will cut her, but I will stop the provider role for sure. At this point its up to her, I've been doing 100% of the chasing its time to see if she can reciprocate. I was planning to do this all along before the request, but the request made things a lot more awkward. I'm sure I will see her soon because we share one social circle, so it will be interesting. I'm usually the one who always calls/text so I bet she's thinking of something..

Yea is a next, big mountain to climb better off spending your time else where...

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PostPosted: Wed Jul 30, 2014 4:07 pm 
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Pay her to respond to you.

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