Well, I'm sort of into pickup for LTR, personally. However I understand the responses from most guys will be from the view point of going after other girls, however my goal is different. She sometimes tries to bust me on flirting with other girls like "I so seen you flirt with her lol" etc.. I get confused and try to say no I wasn't, (earlier I started saying, "No, she was flirting with me l.") Or I can't help if woman find me attractive it doesn't mean I'll flirt back etc.. I realized I can't deny it or act like I'm caught.

I mean, I've seen her for a while now, and after talking with a friend of mine I feel more confident and worry free. But don't you guys think it's time to lock it down and be with her? That way, i can see if she still talks to other guys and of recently visits OKC, and she commits, we'll be good. That's what I feel. But you guys know more then me.

Also, she really does like me a lot. She always says things like, "Your crazy about me, you've so fallen for me" or she says I wanna look good for you and calls me babe... Lots of IOI's

IMPORTANT: How should I find out if her hearts really into it before I ask, and also see if she isn't dating other guys. My fear is that she's been seeing her coworker while I've been away. She lives in Queens ny, I live in another state (1 hour away).

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Hmm about your question.

Your probably not going to like this but honestly there seems to be to much insecurity in this relationship. Its going to kill you later just as much as its a pain for you now.

Have you guys had the 'talk' yet? Or is it just 'assumed'?
Theres a very big difference? If its just assumed, try not to expect too much. If you've had the talk already, then she shouldnt be messing around full stop.

From what you've written though it doesn't sound like a legit relationship.

The most important thing I have to say which I don't think your going to like is the fact that you 'need' her too much. You see if your neediness doesn't drive her away now, or when your in a relationship 2 years from now, it will still drive you insane and cause massive problems for you. I know - I've been there.

By no means I'm not implying your weak by saying your needy - it affects everyone. But what you do with that feeling is whats going to determine the outcome of your future relationships and your emotional stability.

1. Take your mind off her. Regular people get heavily involved in their purpose in life or mad players just go out and mack more chicks. Either will get you out of this dangerous head space. Good relationships are born out of abundance.

Anyway, sorry I didn't directly answer your question, but this will solve problem of a greater context your facing rather than the simplicity of the content.

-goundy

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I think we have probably all been in this situation at one point or another, especially when we are fairly inexperienced with the opposite sex.

People are pretty quick to jump on this guy about neediness, but being needy is not something that is corrected overnight. It is a state of mind. It is corrected after months of banging good looking girls.

Your best solution is to fake your lack of neediness as best as possible. Flirt with other girls more, and diversify your portfolio a little bit.

you didn't reply to my message man. you can private message me if you want to.

I have an advice for you. Since you see this girl and you've kissed have one goal in mind:

FUCK HER ASAP.

Only think about this and how can you achieve it. If you are together and start kissing escalate. I don't think you are a virgin are you ? If you need advice how to make this happen there are plenty of posts in this forum but you can PM me.

If you start having sex with her it will solve a lot of your problems. Don't even think about telling her anything that bothers you (I know I'm contradicting my old post but I didn't realize that she is not your girlfriend).

Goundy, thanks for your response your a smart dude lol. It's just been assumed so far, every time I've seen her now I get all emotional at the end of the date and I give like a stupid relationship speech lol. This time I thought I can take her out to a nice club, enjoy life, get physical then (or visa versa) tell her how I feel about her and want her to be my Gf. I'm assuming she'd say yes, if it's no it means something's up and I'll just leave her...

As for neediness? No, I'm not really needy lol. Last night I girl I talked to on FB stopped me, and screamed for me to come talk to her at her Job. I believe I'm an amazing person and other woman will LOVE me, matter of fact, it's their please just to talk to me. I'm just confessing my anxieties to everyone here, I'm a man, I'm human and in honestly trying my best to control my emotions and it's a lot better. The anxiety/butterflies is leaving and most of the fear.

But if someone can address the problems I stated in my top post is appreciate it. Idk how to ask her out or see where her heart is before I ask her to be my Gf. Imo I feel it's time. Once I tell her the way I feel I'm gonna' end it with, "However, I'm no ones fool, if your ever manipulative, or lie me I will leave you as soon as I found you." Showing her I don't need her and conditions of my relationship.

P.S. Since the hotel night, she sorta' hasn't contacted me as much.. Should I be concerned. Maybe she talks to her coworker cause he texts her a lot and I don't put in that much effort to her. She may think he likes her more.

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Read the post above by AFCToTheMax. Don't get into "if you do this then I'm going to do that and break up with you" stuff with a girl you haven't fucked. Escalate and have sex with her and ALL of the issues you think you have today will be gone. They will vanish.

That's definitely on my to do list.. (also where is a good sex location? I'm from out of town and she lives at her parents?)
So from what I got out of this was some great inner game, to be unfazed by her, seduce her, and also my plan is to ask her to be my Gf and tell her the way I feel (keep in mind I'm sure she has emotions for me too and is "addicted" to me) ..if she still talks to other guys and visits OKC I'll ditch her.

I won't give her the terms and conditions speech lol. How should I ask her to be my Gf in a DHV pua way?

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You shouldn't ditch her. Why would she stick with you mate honestly ? You had couple of dates with her and nothing happened yet.

Please for the love of god do not ask her to be your girlfriend. Why do you want to do that anyway ? If you want her to stop flirting with other guys you have to get physical. There is no other way.

In terms of sex location. If you have some money get a motel. If you have your own room, ask her to come back to urs for drinks and movie. Or go to hers. She lives with parents ? Ohwell, you can close the door. Every place is viable as long as you can have some privacy.

For you own sake. FORGET PUA. For now atleast. Concentrate on getting physical. Be a fucking man.

Dude, thanks for your opinion... I already mentioned that I'd get physical with her. Feel free to pm me any escalation tips you may know. The best seduction location I can come up with is my car. Motels and all that cost a lot of money in the that area.

I just got off the phone with her and I think I did a great job, I did a lot better. I'll update the details better. I spoke from a non-needy or emotional mindset and I just felt like I did better. Cause my minds been in a rut lately. But I got into game for a Gf, I'm sorta bored from the player lifestyle for now. I mean I should lock it down, some way and let her know how I feel. I feel that it's important. I understand where Xoved is coming from and with this girl I can tell she's interested in me, and likes me. I just left a lot of the IOI's out, because I thought they didn't matter.

Also the part you said about "Don't ditch her. Why would she want to stay with you." I didn't get please explain.

P.S. She called me, after a bit of fluff talk, she told me she has to do shopping with her mom and said we can either meet up late or see each other next week. She said, "I don't want you to be mad" something like that. I said, that's perfect cause I have to take care of something earlier so seeing her after she's done (8 pm) is perfect. She agreed it was cool. Did I save it there or should hv rescheduled? I think I saved it

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Problem here is that you are way TOO overthinking things and creating up scenarios that don't exist in the first place. First of all, sit alone for around 15 minutes, clear your mind completely of every single idea you have and focus on your goal. You want to make her your girlfriend, do you really want that? Do you think you'll be perfect 3 months from now? 6 months? A year? If not, keep her as a close fuck buddy. If the answer is yes, would you have to go through trouble from time-to-time in the relationship? If you see this girl as trouble, I wouldn't suggest you make her your girlfriend.

A man does not talk about how he wants a girl or feels strongly about her, she should tell you that. The way to get this girl is NOT to be emotional towards her. Instead, ACT it out. By acting out, I mean lead her and always be the first to make decisions. You want to have a beer? Hold her hand tell her "come". Make a romantic mood when you are with her alone,it doesn't have to be that fancy and expensive. Most importantly, escalate and show her that you have strong sexual desires. The moment you have good sex with her is the moment she'll start ditching other guys for you, and only you.

You have to understand that women are very emotional, especially when it comes to physical contact. They get attached too fast, and with sex, it's a completely new stage.

As I said, act unfazed. Women LITERALLY love drama and attention. They just crave it so bad, you won't even know how much they are attracted to such stuff. Your only job is to deprive them from things like these. Don't show jealousy and don't act hurt in front of her, that would drive her insane. It's ok to flirt with other girls, she's flirting herself buddy. The moment she shows jealousy is history, she likes you man, you have her, all you have to do is to try your best to escalate more sexually and she's yours.

That was very helpful Xoved -- point taken. I think I'm just becoming immune to this feeling little by little. Everyday I care less and am getting more control on my emotions. I hv to. And the next time this happens (thanks to you guys) I'LL BE PREPARED WITH KNOWLEDGE.

I think she's been letting me know that when other guys flirt with her, or when she talks to other guys it's nothing I should worry about. She said this guy msg'ed her out of the blue that she used to have a crush on (her best friend took him first) and he found her FB somehow, and msg'ed her.. She said, "He talked me and started flirting with me. I was like your seeing someone why are you even flirting with me? I'm seeing someone and he wouldn't be jelous cause nothing for him to be jelous about." In girl talk, she tried to make that last bit clear to me lol. I made a joke of it saying, "Looks like you hv a stalker, you should put up a security system outside of your house lol. Some guys are just losers." I think I did good there. A

(After she was txting her co-worker in front me she also said, "He showed me around on my first day in work and helped with a lot of info all the other co-workers kept from me. It's good to hv friends that look out for you." Yes, she said that, but I think what if she's lying and flirting with him.. What do you guys think.)

I also said, the same thing happen to me. A girl msg'ed me on FB telling me to come meet her I went to the mall to buy clothes, I passed by her and she started screaming "HEY!!!" To get me to stop and them shes like "Hi" and all that bull crap. Idc how beautiful a girl is, when your ignorance shows. She really couldn't take a hint, I told her I had to leave to buy clothes...

Sounded like I demonstrated the things you guys told me to...
1) So I can I smoothly escalate in seduction?
2) I also realized I should confess my emotions for her, that gives her power. But it wouldn't hurt to tell her I'm in love with her? Also, how should I hand the relationship issue. Should I just assume we're together and act like it. How do I handle that?

_________________
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Your only option to win this girl over is by sexual escalation. And when I say escalation, it means get intimate with her privately and try to lead it to sex. The type of girl you're dealing with is the great horny type, and you'll get to know this later on, you'll see. This girl CRAVES attention, let her have it and don't be affected by who she talks to.

Let her test you, let her do anything she pleases, you're still not official so you both can do anything.
It's ok to show her that you are talking to other girls, that would keep her hooked up with you and it'll add some spice to the interaction. You might notice that she might get mad and even upset and deny that she's into you, but that's called jealousy my friend.

And yes, telling her that you are in love her BEFORE she brings up the relationship talk is a bad move, a really bad one. And by acting out I meant displaying relationship behavior before even getting into the relationship itself. Yes, do buy her a flower if you see a flower guy running around the street. Teach her how to play pool, take her to a wonderful scenery and make out with her, always surprise her with new things. She'll get attached to you along the way.

In short: The more things you do with her, the faster she'll get attached.

To be honest there's a bit I left out. Simple cause I never came across thos before and didn't know how to handle it.

"And yes, telling her that you are in love her BEFORE she brings up the relationship talk is a bad move, a really bad one. And by acting out I meant displaying relationship behavior before even getting into the relationship itself. Yes, do buy her a flower if you see a flower guy running around the street. Teach her how to play pool, take her to a wonderful scenery and make out with her, always surprise her with new things. She'll get attached to you along the way."

She's already brung up the relationship with me. Like on the 4th time she met me and she's already attached to me. There's just a grey area of her telling me she had commitment issues, which is why I think the way I did. Lately I've been pulling myself together and hv becoming social again. Just being in a social talkative state.

My point is, we're already close: So since it's been a while maybe it's safe to say I love you? But I realized by just keeping my mouth shut I can't lose anything and I just should be in the moment. And to let her know my intentions, I hv to be romantic/unpredictable with her and captivate her. I'm learning Xoved - bare with me lol. So today I'm gonna' tell her we're going for dinner but really bring her food and take her to a rooftop bar xD How could I escalate there? And please explain escalation

_________________
"Be the flame, not the moth." - Casanova

My journal confessions-of-a-seducer-journey-to-gre ... 84193.html Online/Offline, Texting & Reports.

Telling her you love her before you've even seen her naked, let alone had sex with her, is the quickest way to get dumped. Unless you are about 16 and she is a virgin.

Girls do not fall in love until they have sex. Having "a crush" is not being in love. Stop being a wuss and stop trying to win girls over with words and promises. Girls want physicality and real action, not words.