PUAing my housemate



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 Post subject: Re: PUAing my housemate
PostPosted: Wed Jul 10, 2013 12:11 pm 
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I see female PU artistry as taking an active role in getting what you want. In the States and even to some extent here, the impetus is put on men to approach and make the first move; to be the pursuers. I don't think they should be expected to do all of the work, and a lot of guys I know like to be hit on. I often hear women from the US complain when they move here that men don't hit on them enough-- imo these women are used to just kind of sitting back, looking hot, and waiting for men to line up and proposition them. It's like they don't realize that in a more gender-equal society, hitting on people goes both ways…I had the same attitude when I first moved here, like "waah no one is catcalling me anymore-- am I not pretty enough to these people?" It's because I was used to a culture in which women have the "luxury" of being passive, pretty receivers. If you want a guy here you often have to work for it. Basically I think it's your own job, if you want something, to go get it-- regardless of your gender.

As for my own experience, many human attraction behaviors like the ones covered in PU are applicable to either gender. I actually attribute mentally discarding the gender binary (as opposed to the whole "mysterious female mind" "what do women want?? "male sexuality vs female sexuality, "men are from mars, women are from venus" attitude) to my success w/ seducing people, because you're connecting w/ them on a more personal level, instead of trying to fit them into a generic box.
However, as a scientist I recognize that there are real physiological differences between men and women on the neurological/hormonal level contributing to some differences in sexual needs and patterns. So I keep that in mind, and at the same time I think of people as human first and gender second. It's not a matter of ideology or politics (I hate identity politics, feminism-versus-MRA gender wars stuff), it's just the approach that has been very effective for me.


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