My sister asked me iff she could pass on my number to an HB9.
The point to this was bringing 2 wild people (me and her) together because we both wanted more adrenalin in life (kitesurfing, skydiving etc)
So i started texting with this 9, arrogantly! for me it was fun natural and challenging.
After a week my sis was pissed because this 9 was doubtfull iff she was going to keep replying to my text because i was such an arrogant fuck!
I had no clue she didn't like it. So i called the 9 openly saying it was just play from my side. She asked me to show her my nice side. Wich i did. She really appreciated it !
A few days later I met the 9 my sisters BBQ party.
Had fun, got drunk, and after spending a few hours on a trampoline she almost raped me ! I said no! Because i didn't intend on it or expect it, i still saw her as a potential wild friend.
Anyway she pulled every trick out off her hat and got me to kissing her and 'just barely' not fucking her untill the early hours off the morning (the only thing that stopped me was the lack off protection)

The day after we went to my place and spend the whole day in bed, intimately, yet we kept on our underwear. We both loved it im sure. And I was so relaxed my arrogance disappeared naturally !!!!!

The day after I send her a supersweet text. No response for a whole day. At the end off the day a blahblah text, a response from me, more blah blah from her, again simple respons from her. Third text blah blah and she mentioned the sweet text that she was playing by the samer rules. I gave an arrogant reply.
Two days off silence.
After two days I get another blah blah (how was your workday or something off the likes) I ignored it! And went out with a friend.
Now I love absinth, and got superdrunk and gigantically arrogant in a cocktail bar.
I convinced 4 chicks we were hanging out with that I was arrogant and why I tought it was great!!!!
Two left. Two stayed. They both saw it as an act and said I was supersweet.
I kept up my fuck it I do and say what I want and don’t give a shit about you (act).

Actually it wasn’t an act this time. I had the HB 9 in my head and I didn’t care for the two 7s in the bar.
Yet after an hour or so I asked one off them you know why I act like this? I think i am frustrated because I really am into a girl I met this weekend.
She said you see you are sweet and I like you! I said well iff you like me so much you should kiss me. And in a blink off an eye she did. Again and again.
Her friend and my friend really didn’t like it so that was basically the end off the evening.
I got home frustrated. Thinking about my 9 and I send her a text I thought was funny. (day after)
I send: absinth 4 peanut 0 to bad powernaps don’t cure having a goldfishmemory. Btw you need to vacume your hair better. – now I liked this text since she had vacuumed her hair the morning after the bbq and forgot how hard she sexually pushed me the night before and I had made fun off that fact all day .
Hours leter I get the respons: hard parties have hard consecuenses, sit it through
Me again after 1min : Arrrgh evil! How do you do this! I am not even laying in your hair for 5min!
she always text me around 01-02 at night I pretend to be just in bed. And she says her friends called her evil before.
Her again: listen boy a few hairs wont kill you so tell you what mail them to me then atleast I have them back.
Me again: no way I am planning on making a voodoodoll with them, fight evil with evil
Her do that!!!:-D why don’t you start straight away!

Again I was frustrated and pissed at myself for being so hard and arrogant instead off nice and open…. So I didn’t respond for hours.
In the middle off the nigh I send her in a funny way ok iff you wake up again ill stop the arrogance.


HOW DO I FLIP MY BEHAVIOR in this situation….. this is the first girl I meet in over a year I actually like ALLOT. She isn’t just an 9 but she is fucking cool and interesting !

Hey Adrenalin,

I've noticed that my attitude there gets toned down the most when:

#1: I'm only looking to make a good impression as a friend. This is hard to psyche myself into. It almost always requires me to be sober as well.

#2: I treat them like they are my little princess and I am their king father.

#3: I focus on talking about them and not myself. I think about them as a person and there will inevitably be a part of them that intrigues me. I talk about that. This has no boundaries too as it is genuine curiosity. For me I have never really gotten a negative response from things like this once I've already broken the ice.

Communication with her is the best suggestion I have! Let her know your fears and challenges. It will allow her to connect with you on an intimate level. You will need this type of communication for a strong LTR anyhow, why not start now?

Good Luck...

_________________
Crypto...
______________________________________
All girl's are Freaks...It is your job to bring it out in them! - Crypto

You need to stop bending over and letting her ass fuck your brain! - Heywood

I talked to some female friends and got the same advice as you gave me.

I contacted her with a phonecall and just spit out it was driving me insane ! and that i needed to see her.

she felt exactly the same as me.

We spent four hours at the side off this lake.

I tried to listen as much as possible, more or less did. i still talked to much but i actively controlled my arrogance! and in her presence it is sooooooo much easier then with any other woman i know.


THis four hour talk led us into extremely private and intimate conversations... And i mean extreme ! almost ubelievable the amount off pure trust we have in eachother after barely spending a few days together. Also physically it was clear we both could not not touch eachother... yet we both said and acted on the fact we think going sexual is dangerous to fuck up this connection we have !

Yet i have a big question in my head that keeps bouncing arround:

how do i keep this from becomming/ or feeling like a true relationship!!!! It would be by far the dumbest thing i can do in my life right now !
(for verry personal reasons but i am doubtless about it !)

do i keep contact or let her be untill our next date (kitesurfing in about a week or two) we also made NO TEXTING RULE !!! do i stick to it or break it?

PS i am definately going to follow your advice because the three things you say tone down your attitude are right on the mark !!!!!

your advice is superapprciated this HAS TO WORK ! i dont give a shit if its called onenitis

.... And there we have it.

Dude, say that now... and that's cool. But - remember that when your oneitis has her fucking someone else and you're miserable...


Don't overthink any of this.

And, why does sex have to screw it up? Why can't the frame be one of the natural progression and that's a logical next step? You already said you don't want it to feel like a relationship, yet you spend 4 hours talking intimately with some chick you just met? Sounds like a relationship. I don't spend 4 hours with a chick on a date unless I know I'm going to fuck her, or it's an activity-based date -- unless she deserves that amount of time with me (IE: I'm interested in her).

You're all over the map - and that's not a bad thing. Just be congnizant of it, and know your own goals prior to advancing things with her.

Seriously, what DO you want?

RR

_________________
Women are like ceramic tile.... if you do the prep work, and lay them properly the first time...you can walk all over them for years to come.

what your saying is a social intelligence thing

some people will react negatively even if you push them slightly

it sounds like your confident and speak your mind - a lot of people can't hack that.

Better to just take it in your stride. Some people will like you and some won't no matter what you do.

Also, be more complimentary - throw more compliments in to people to diffuse any tension. this way you will come across as more confident instead of arrogant

i really am pleased whit this advice !!!

I need to figure out what i want ! really want from this girl.
I know i have the confidence, comfortlevel, selfcontrol and physical right touch to get what i want from her.

I just need to clear it out in my head so i KNOW what exactly is the most positive thing i can get out off this, FOR ME and then make her fit to that idea.

one thing tho...
after i figure it out its important i build the right path between us this next few weeks since i am leaving for a month on a journey abroad.

how long can i think before our connection starts fading iff i dont take further steps. And maybe even more important how do i make her take the next steps in my direction?

... You still haven't defined what you want man...

It starts there.

Without a goal, you're a rudderless ship.

RR

_________________
Women are like ceramic tile.... if you do the prep work, and lay them properly the first time...you can walk all over them for years to come.

Figured it out !!!

It actually was simple as it hit me....

I have no room for anything that even comes close to a relationship, I am so bound to this newlearned freedom off doing my things my way, finding my way. I can not forsake this, it is by far the worst thing i could decide to let go off....

And the thing i need most is a broader social life, wilder, more chaos and fun since most off my friends are more and more going into the-white-picketfence-two cars-a house-and two children-life.

to top it off and maybe this is the biggest clue, i have no female FRIENDS. Everytime i click with a woman it becomes a relationship or a fling sometimes a nice romance. But not one real yearlong friend.

SO WHAT I WANT is to turn this into a wild friendship, go do crazy stuff together for the next few years.... all the rest ill find out allong the way. Iff it even gets as far as i now expect and hope.

The second it hit me. I called her just to say hi and lead it into fixing a date to go kitesurfing this month. She didn't pick up, but she will call. No rush no hurry... no more thinking !!!

Thanx for the advice, you guys made me clear my head!!! it was needed !

You're the man!

Once you get it in your head as to what you want.... it's all gravy from there!!

_________________
Women are like ceramic tile.... if you do the prep work, and lay them properly the first time...you can walk all over them for years to come.

a phonecall and 3 verry simple honest texts ===> I am taking her kitesurfing on monday !!! She is fanatically excited about it !!! so am I !

sooooo ONLY THE FORCES OFF MOTHER NATURE WILL STOP ME NOW !!!! (no wind)