Hello,

I went to a club and approached two targets. I was with a group of friends and there was a girl in our group that is hot and I did not want to go crazy approaching everyone in the club. Because I might try approaching this girl later. I did not even tell her more than 3 sentences today but I think I might see her again with those friends.

Anyways, here are the two failed approaches in the club, and that seems to be a recurring problem I have in clubs.

1st approach: I see a HB7, she is with a guy. I walk straight to her:
ME: Hey, your arms are strong, do you play Handball?
HER: No! [she smiles]
ME: Which sport do you practice?
HER: I swim... [smiles]
Than I tell her a story about me swimming when I was little. So far I do not flirt with her.
Afterward I talk to the guy who is with her. He tells me that they were co-workers before. What happens later is that I asked my friend to talk to the guy while I talk to her again, but he did not want to do it. So I talk to her again. I notice she has her tongue pierced and I say:
ME: You have tongue piercing?
HER: Yes.
ME: I only kissed one girl with a piercing there before.
HER: But it is not possible to notice that a girl has a piercing when you kiss her.
ME: Yes it is! If you want we can try.
She smiles and then goes to her friend and then they leave.

2nd approach: I notice two girls sitting. I sit next to one of them. And after about 10 seconds I start. I never look at her directly while talking to her. She is to my left.
ME: Are you tired of dancing?
HER: I am actually sleepy and I need to work tomorrow morning.
ME: Oh, when do you need to wake up?
HER: At 10am, but the thing is that I need to go back home today.
ME: Where do you live?
She then tells me where she lives and afterwards she tells me that she needs to leave and tells me goodbye.


Did I do anything wrong? Or the only mistake was the fact that I approached ONLY 2 targets? Had I kept approaching like that I could succeed?


Thanks guys!

Hey Friend,

Read your post, and I've been there.
It's easy to fall into interview mode, or just grow some balls and put it right on the line and go for it.
And I think that is exactly what you have done here.

Sounds like approach 1 was going well to get some social proof, you opened in a fun manner, then when she answered you went straight into comfort by storytelling (and it seems without it including DHV spikes).
I would of suggested a neg to the whole swim thing, to disarm both the target and the obstacle. Maybe something like "could you have picked a more boring sport" obviously calibrated with a cheeky smile and a "nah, just kidding, at least it doesn't require hand-eye co-ordination". This could have opened the door to a kino ping say "Lets see if you can even do a high five" or something, I don't know.
It's hard in the moment to think of material, but straight after the story you told, you went into interview mode with the situational thread "You have a tongue piercing?"

A FTC and an opinion routine could have done wonders here.
Once again, I appreciate how hard it is to stack interesting material in the field on the fly, but I think you may have come off a bit needy as if trying to keep the conversation going a bit eagerly.


The second approach was completely interview mode... question question question about situational things.
If a girl is reminded about negative things as in 1)feeling tired 2)having to get up early 3)going home 4)work... I have no idea how you build attraction because it's not exciting or creating fun.
Maybe a challenging statement like "You don't look like the partying type. Not everyone can be fun. I've got to head off to meet my friends in a minute, so this will only take a sec, but I need an opinion on something..."

I don't know, just some ideas.
I know the canned stuff isn't always appealing as it feels fake, but its just a way to lower their guard and get you in there so that you can share yourself.
They gotta be drawn in to give you a shot, because they have probably been asked millions of questions by nice guys and need something different.

Hope this helps mate, I know it's done a little for me.

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