I have been reading pick up stuff for a few months now. I've come to the realization that most of the written material addresses AFC mistakes like being a doormat and/or overly formal (e.g. buying girls drinks and going on dinner dates). These aren't mistakes that I've had problems with.

My main sticking points have always involved social fluidity. I'm not talking about shyness; I can be shy at times, but I'm much less so than men I know who get a lot more pussy.

I have strong ADD/ADHD. This means that I zone out a lot in conversations, and often wind up staring at something unwittingly. I start thinking about any number of random things, many of which are unpleasant (unrelated to AA or the current situation) I also have essential tremor, which can make my muscle movements jerky and unfluid, especially if I'm stressed.

I seem to get tagged as creepy a lot, and it's kind of degrading. I have no desire to stalk, rape, or harass women in any way, but they give me looks like I'm Jack the Ripper. AMOGs have similar reactions.

I try to tell myself that "creepy" is just chick talk for unwanted sexual aggression/presence, and that I shouldn't be too phased by it, but I still feel shitty about it. Does anyone else on here have these problems? I think this is a MUCH nastier label to deal with than "nice guy".

Basically you have a bit of a challenge.

My challenge to overcome is that I look very young for my age. Here are the things I do:

1. Make a joke early on acknowledging the fact that I am young looking (you can't make fun of someone about something you've already made light of and laughed about before)

2. Dress "older" e.g. rarely wear t-shit, jeans and trainers, instead collared shirt, dress shoes, etc.

3. Make sure my voice tonality is as low as possible without sounding forced

4. Display my intelligence, understanding and knowledge about subjects that shows my years and displays competence and confidence.

5. Talk about sexual topics openly.

Now, for you, you've realised a lot of what your "problem" is, so if you know that you have a tendency to move jerkily, you need to work on making a conscious effort to move very slowly and deliberately and try and flow. Have you tried doing dance classes, or acting classes (they always teach how to move on stage)?

Zoning out isn't necessarily going to kill your convo. In fact a lot of fun humour can come of you coming up with random jokes about your surroundings. Also, if the girl is interested and you keep drifting off, she'll often be trying to work for your attention, thinking that she's being boring and needs to say the right thing to grab you again. A good thing.

The best way to not come off as creepy is make sure that you SMILE when you begin an interaction. Smiling is the universal way to signal you're not a threat, and it begins the conversation with the right tone. Instead of going up to "sets," specifically, go out with the intention of just meeting people and being social and friendly.

If you're on medication like Ritalin, I would encourage you to experiment with taking a month or two off from the meds whilst cutting out carbs completely, eating a high fat (good fat, like from grass fed meat, butter, eggs, milk, avocado, salmon, etc.) high-protein diet, exercising regularly and eating NO SUGAR.

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Thanks for the help blondguy, you're pretty on point.

I have in fact started taking some swing dancing lessons (there are some free ones in Columbus). I did some martial arts when I was a teenager, but it was very fighting focussed. As a result, I have some speed and rhythm, but no grace. Makes me worry that I'm gonna wind up hurting my dance partner, but I'm hoping things improve with practice.

I have a pretty deep voice and know how to project it, and I bring up sexual topics a lot around girls, though usually as a joke. The problem is that I often do this jumping back into a conversation that bored the crap out of me, after I've been quiet for a while. This, combined with my habit of making extremely subtle jokes, seems to be a recipe for a lot of social awkwardness around high value crowds.