Hi guys, first post here.

I need some advice on what to do when I get opened by girls. I am a very alternative looking guy and naturally attractive, people stop me to take photos in the street, slow down to gawk and me from their cars and most nights I go out to clubs and bars I will turn almost all of the heads. I was alternative before I heard of pickup and ideas like peacocking: it is just naturally how I am. I know alpha guys are supposed to stand out, but I probably go too far the other way and turn a lot of chicks off or some probably assume I am gay (I am unwilling to compromise on my unique style though...it is who I am and I have grown into a bit of a visual exhibitionist over the years). That said many are intrigued by me and will open me at the bar, dancefloor (I am a very confident dancer) or even just come over and interrupt me and my mates.

Usually the girls will complement me, or they will ask where I bought a certain something...and I just literally explain the truth to them...and then eventually the conversation runs out. I have even blown girls off because I ran out of things to say and they wouldn't leave. This may sound like I am bragging, but really I consider it to be pathetic on my part...cant even get a girl who opens me...

The truth is I am a total AFC. I was always a socially awkward academic type and never really learned how to talk to people outside of an academic or work setting. I have spent years "fixing" many of my issues getting over fear after fear, now at 29 I want to master women because it was supposed to be better than this. I had one 3.5 year relationship and a few stands, but in all cases the women did most of the pickup work...I was just lucky to not fuck it up.

I would love to receive advice on what you guys have done when a women has opened or chased you. I am happy to be even able to extend some of these encounters and at least give some of the conversations somewhere to go...

Thanks for any advice: I hope to become a regular contributor to this board and really make a go of pickup!

You are not your clothes. Excessive peacocking is a sign of neediness. It means you crave attention you otherwise don't get without peacocking.


If a girl approaches you first, you have permission to escalate and make her qualify. If you keep answering her questions you are submitting to her, but it should be the other way around. Flip the script. Let them open you because it seems to be happening anyway, but see if they draw YOUR interest. You've already got her guard down.

Qualify/escalate/GABAPYCO

_________________
Attraction is a choice.
ITS YOUR CHOICE!
Spread Love
-Ders


www.facebook.com/spreadloveders

Hey thanks for that, and I think you are pretty much right: I need to get her answering my questions and then not be afraid to escalate/show a bit of sexuality. I am OK with this on the dancefloor...where some griding eventually starts happening, but I am a bad judge on when to escalate in conversation.

First things first though, I am gonna take your advice and ask her all the questions, and give nothing away about me. I found that asking her about what she likes about me is a good way to put her on the spot and then ask her why she isn't wearing something similar if she likes it so much, after this the conversation seems to run more relaxed (at least for me).

Your basic knowledge of fast-paced dance floor escalation will help you with escalation elsewhere. Compliance...push/pull. Fast but subtle initiation and gradually go from there.

_________________
Attraction is a choice.
ITS YOUR CHOICE!
Spread Love
-Ders


www.facebook.com/spreadloveders