There's a very cute work-study student who works the front desk in an office in an adjacent building that I've had my eye on. Being staff, I'm technically not allowed to sleep with students but nothing is stopping me from gaming them. I'm always looking for opportunities to open sets with cute girls around the university. I wanted to test a new ESP routine in a safe environment, so I printed my materials and prepped myself and headed over there to "run an errand." It worked flawlessly, and it went over so well that two days later people are still talking about it whenever I go over there.
I open by approaching her desk casually and asking her if she's busy. It's an office so it's a fair question. I see her computer is on Facebook so I know she's just fooling around. I think she is already into me a little bit, because she's always smiling and touching her hair whenever I walk into the office. She immediately closes her FB and gives me her undivided attention.
Here's the routine I ran (This is a version of a trick that came from a book on ESP I recently read. It's a little long but it's worth the read...):
Me: "Hey how are ya?" She's a workstudy student so she kinda has to respond to me. "So I've been practicing some ESP. Do you believe in ESP?"
Target: "No, I don't believe in that stuff."
Me: "OK well I'm going to make you a believer. You want to try?"
Her: "OK sure." She's smiling and loving the attention.
Me: "I'm not going to just read your mind, I'm going to control your mind. I'll lead you through an exercise that will plant three mental images into your mind."
Her: "Oh really?" She gets a little sassy. *bites fist*
Me: I take a sealed envelope out of my bag and place it on the transaction counter of her desk. "Not only will I plant these images in your mind, but I will guarantee that the images in your mind will match the contents of this sealed envelope." She looks at me very suspiciously. "To get these pictures in your head, I'm going to reprogram your mind with a little exercise. You ready?" She's giving me the 'you're-full-of-shit' eyes.
Me: "Ok so pick a number from 1 to 10. Picture it in your mind." I'm rubbing my hands together slowly and looking directly into her eyes. "You got it?"
Her: "Yes"
Me: "Don't tell me what it is. Now take that number and multiply it by nine. You got it?" She shakes her head and looks confused.
Her: "I need a calculator." I get in a few playful negs about her math skills. It's gold. We finally settle on a number. I gaze into her eyes piercingly but smiling. I'm starting to get little audience of people in the office.
ME: "OK now you see a two digit number in your mind, right?" She nods. "OK so now take those two digits and add them together, as if they were separate digits. Don't tell me what it is." I take my extended index fingers and bring them together in front of my face until the points of my fingers are touching.
Her: "OK"
Me: "Now take that number, and subtract 5."
Her: "Oooo-k...."
Me: "You got it?"
Her: "Yah, I think so."
ME: "OK so now every number has a corresponding letter of the alphabet. For example, A=1, B=2, C=3, etc. Take your number and match it up with the corresponding letter of the alphabet. You got it?" She nods.
Me: "Now pick a country that starts with that letter. Just go with the first thing that comes to mind" She looks flustered. "You got it?"
Her: "I'm not sure this is a country...." Some more playful negs about her math AND geography skills (everyone laughs).
Me: "Ok. Picture the name of that country in your mind. Picture all the letters. Visualize the last letter of that name. Do you see it? Now pick an animal that starts with that letter." Keep the pace quick. She nods.
Me: "OK now picture the animal name in your mind, and visualize the last letter of that name. You got it? Pick a fruit that starts with that letter. Do you have it?" She nods.
Me: "OK so you have a country, an animal, an a fruit. Picture all three of those in your mind. You got them?" She nods.
Me: "Now open the envelope."
Her: She opens the envelope unfolds the piece of paper inside, and screams. "How did you do that??!" I just shrug, put on my sunglasses, and go about my errand and then leave. She is dumbfounded and throws down the paper. She is laughing and smiling but wont even touch the paper. She accuses me of being "dark."
In the envelope is a picture of the country Denmark (with the words "Denmark" written across it), a kangaroo, and an orange.
Little did she know that EVERYONE who does this exercise picks Denmark/kangaroo/orange because the little math exercise ALWAYS comes out with the same result: 4.
Here's how it works:
This trick is really just about mathematics. Pick a number from 1-10 and multiply by 9, add the numbers together, and subtract 5:
1 x 9 = 9 - 5 = 4
2 x 9 = 18, 1+8 = 9 - 5 = 4
3 x 9 = 27, 2+7 = 9 - 5 = 4
4 x 9 = 36, 3+6 = 9 - 5 = 4
5 x 9 = 45, 4+5 = 9 - 5 = 4
6 x 9 = 54, 5+4 = 9 - 5 = 4
7 x 9 = 63, 6+3 = 9 - 5 = 4
8 x 9 = 72, 7+2 = 9 - 5 = 4
9 x 9 = 81, 8+1 = 9 - 5 = 4
10 x 9 = 90, 9+0 = 9 - 5 = 4
1 is the only anomaly - it doesn't result in a two digit number, but nearly no one picks 1 as their number. Statistically most people pick 5, 6 or 7. The trick will still work if someone picks 1, but if someone balks because their multiplication doesn't result in a two digit number you just tell them not to worry and continue. You also can't let anyone pick 0. You can use the statement like "0 is not a number, it's nothing."
There aren't that many countries that start with "D". Djbouti and the Dominican Republic are the only ones I can think of, and those don't exactly roll of the tongue. For obvious reasons I'd urge you not to use this on African or Caribbean people.
Once they have Denmark, the choices get even smaller. Technically they can pick koala or kimono dragon, but as long as you keep the pace quick, under stress someone is going to go with the first thing that pops into their mind and it's been proven that kangaroos are the first thing people think of. Again, if you know someone is a koala bear expert or lizard keeper, maybe reconsider doing this trick. And once they get kangaroo, there are no other fruits that start with "o".
I went on google and searched up pictures of Denmark kangaroo and orange and printed them on a piece of paper on my color printer. Opening the envelope and unfolding the paper definitely heightened the drama of the trick. It also is a little memento of the trick that she can keep and it will visually remind her of your excellence.
Anyway, the result is that now I have instant rapport with this girl, which is exactly what I wanted. I'm continuing to game her quietly, not really expecting it will go anywhere. If I suddenly find her chatting me up at dinner, then I know I'm doing my job well
And as I perfect new routines I'm going to use them on some of the other not-so-hot ladies that work in the office but only when she's around so I can continue to get under her skin.
CHAT
