So met this girl off POF. She's alright. I'm not very attracted to her cuz she's 30lb overweight, I'd say she's a HB 5 or 6 but I love her personality. She's cute in other ways. I haven't had sex in 4 years and she kept inviting me over to her place. So I decided I could use the "experience".

The first time we were drunk, 2nd time watched a movie (I wasn't feeling it) and the 3rd time tonight I escalated things because I was horny and she went down on me and stuff. I also had 4 drinks though.

I had trouble getting hard and when I finally did, once the condom was on I didn't feel much of anything having sex. She said she orgasmed twice and she promised she was telling the truth. In the end I never reached orgasm cuz she got tired and I went home.

What gives? Was it the alcohol? Lack of sexual experience (i was sorta anxious) or the condom?

Any tips?

I gained some confidence in that I can get a girl to orgasm but I'm sorta concerned I didn't. I haven't masturbated in 5 days too. I can get hard as hell and ejaculate easily when masturbating. Maybe it's just new to me?

Didn't know if this should go here or where the appropriate sex issues thread sections should go.

Any tips on how newbies can calm anxieties during sex or how to get it up if she is not particularly attractive? She's not terrible though either.

1) If you're not attracted to her - don't fuck her.

2) If you don't think you're able to give complete A-game in bed - don't fuck her.

3) If you have to ask if she came, if she has to prmoise she did - you need more experience.

4) You define what attracts you, nobody else.

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Women are like ceramic tile.... if you do the prep work, and lay them properly the first time...you can walk all over them for years to come.

Rodeo is right with all of that.

Also, if you can get yourself off by masturbating, why not just cum on her tits afterward?

But don't keep this girl around. You got your fuck on and broke your dry spell. Now create a standard and stick to it, don't go lower than you actually want.

Agreed to 3 of those, but #2 is debatable.

Kind of depends on if you just feel like gettin your rocks off and don't care about the girl.

True - sport fucking is some people's game, it's just not mine. If I can't throw A-game each time - I don't.

But yeah, you're right.

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Women are like ceramic tile.... if you do the prep work, and lay them properly the first time...you can walk all over them for years to come.

How can I throw A game when I've only had sex twice in my life (both terrible experiences) and it happened 4 years ago. I don't even know what A game is in bed. Let alone bed game. For most of that time I was voluntarily abstinent (religion) but now I just want to get more sexual experience and have fun. 4 years was too long.

Anyway, I think my issue is that I am just not attracted to her enough. So despite not masturbating in a week, downing 4 shots with her at her place and turning off the lights.... I still can't get hard with her. Sure I love her personality and she always texts me to see how I am and helps me out as a friend but I'm just not attracted to her. It's not just her weight, her breadth smelled (not unbearable though) and her face is all scared up too with acne. Idk. I feel so shallow for saying this about a great girl....but I guess attraction is not a choice. I was hoping I'd get over it.

I guess I keep sticking with her because I have no other options, I like the attention and she has hot friends that I meet at bars over the weekends. I know it sounds desperate but I'm moving in a month or two to Wash D.C. anyway so I'm not really looking at other girls for relationships right now.

Lame. You write a paragraph on how you're not attracted to her, then you write another saying you're going to stick with her. Stupid.

Even if you meet her hot friends, they'll never respect you or look at you as an option, because you're fucking their fat friend.

And moving in a month or two makes this the perfect time to get moving! It takes skill to create a social circle. Start working on your skill now, so you'll have some momentum when you get to DC. Start going to bars solo and approaching ATTRACTIVE women.

All Newbs... read this!

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Women are like ceramic tile.... if you do the prep work, and lay them properly the first time...you can walk all over them for years to come.

Ha, glad I could be used as an example. That was the whole point of all of this was social practice. Just happened to end up in an F close. I think she was just desperate and wanting it to happen though. There was nooo challenge.

Brother... keep working and learning... and NONE OF THEM will be a challenge...

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Women are like ceramic tile.... if you do the prep work, and lay them properly the first time...you can walk all over them for years to come.