Hey im new here, sorry if this is in the wrong forum, but i was wondering if you guys could help me out here

bit of backstory is necessary....

so at college theres this girl always sitting at the front, probably gets straight As, about a HB8. i always sit near the back of class, wear hoodies/hats, and wouldnt be expected to get good marks (i get straight As too). iv never met her but she would definately recognise me.

anyhow, theres this party in 2 nights time, nothing too rugged probably about 30-40 people there. one of my friends (a girl from the same class) was invited by this HB8 and my friend says i can go if i want. at some stage throughout the night she will probably introduce me to the target.

this is where the problems begin.... im not the most confident person, but can hold conversations etc. i have absolutely NO problem talking to guys, or talking to girls who arent on the market (like a friends GF, or some girl im not sexually interested in). however, i tend to flounder and look like an idiot when talking to a girl im interested in (get tongue tied, dont want to say anything in case it comes out bad).

furthermore, i will only know 1-2 people at this party. any tips for approaching those small cliques that form at house parties if i dont know anyone?


after a bit of researching these forums last night i came to the conclusion that my best option is to just try to enjoy myself there, not focus on her at all. try to be the life of the party (prob wont happen, but i can try).


any tips or advice to make this go smoothly? whats my play?

Well it seems to be as though you are going to the party with your friend and HB8 (correct me if I am wrong). This is perfect. You will most likely be introduced to her before the party and she will be like "omg! we have x class together!" Just tell her that the class sucks/is great, whatever.

Just keep conversation light with her before, during and en route to the party. This will invoke her curiosity and jealousy thoughout the night.

In order for this to be effective, though, you need to constantly be meeting new people at the party or doing SOMETHING. If you are just standing around, and not talking to her, she will hone in on the fact that you are awkward.

Concentrate on talking to guys early on as well. It'll be easy for you to relate to them (quite a few will be feeling the same way you are, and theres a lot of subjects you guys can easily relate to.), and it's really easy to fall back into conversation with a guy later in the night, whereas if you do it with a female you have to be on your toes because she might be friends with HB8 and/or think that you are into her..

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sorry i wasnt clear, will prob see her at the party, not beforehand.

thx tho still good advice

In that case you're going to HAVE to neg her very early on.

At parties, theres always more guys than girls, so you have to be memorable. Do this with a neg. A simple one could be implying shes a brownoser for sitting in the front of the class or something...

The rule still applies, when introduced, keep the conversation light (throw in a neg), but leave the conversation at the first time it's appropriate to do so. Don't waver around, you will meet up with her later. After you neg her, shes going to want a couple drinks, and depending on the type of girl after you continue to ignore her, she will want some more drinks! ..which will make it easier later

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What he said, go easy on the negging though, do it playfull.
You dont wanna be an asshole. If you do it to hard your chances are gone.
No idea what you can try to neg

yeah definately will be going easy on the negging (just found out wat that is). tbh im not sure how she will react to that so unless i spot a real easy opportunity for some lighthearted negging ill prob leave it out of my arsenal for this girl, at least untill i can guage her better

1 neg should do the trick... if you aren't going to neg, you need a way to stand out from the rest of the crowd still...

Being a friend of a friend + classmate gives you trust/ensures you're not a creeper, (I'm in a college town and at the bar thats the difference between taking a girl home and only making out with her, so I count on it alot), but that's only going to help so much. Basically what I'm trying to say is that these two factors will only help you seal the deal... you still need to do the grunt work.

You need to make her attracted to you though, which is where I would neg, then slightly ignore. Makes her want to impress you.

By the way, are you looking for a #close or what?

EDIT: Let us know how it goes!

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yeah im not sure what all the close things are "f close" etc

i dont really know her but at this stage i just want to create attraction, if i can get laid the same night thats great (although highly unlikely)

mainly just wanting to introduce myself to her and lay some groundwork for watever eventuates from there

not really looking to just get some sex the first night i meet her

#close means getting her number
I would just wear one of the hats.

Saying something like:
You know why you and I would never work together? because ... (you know her better than I do, so fill in something).

Then after talking a while say you gotta go meet new people, leave her.
After a while come back, and game her.
Ask her stuff like what makes her special, what does she has that makes her stand above all other girls. ( I really like this line, you can talk about it ALOT)

i think what would realy help is if you work on your social proof before you introduce your self to her. open up some mixed sets and get yourself into that talkative state of mind. once she sees that you are 'well known' her interest will kick in. your social proof will give you alot of value so you wont need to relly on much neggs. just hold a playfull attitude.

eh small TR:

turned up to the party, target wasnt there (and my wingwoman found out she wasnt turning up after all)

there were only about 25 people tehre and 20 of them were guys... was pretty lame and the girls wanted to leave so we went to a bar but i didnt really try and game any girls was just dancing with my friends. a bit disappointed with the party i had motivated myself to be social and mix with people i dont know, but then there was hardly any point if they are just all dudes.

although i did note that turning up to a club with some girls and dancing with them got me some IOI from other girls, i was just a bit shy to approach

small steps tho, i consider it a success. next time ill start skeezing on the chiks on the dancefloor

skeezing is bad...skeezing is, well, skeezy.

Dude the problem I see is that you had to motivate yourself just to be social. I'm not a mystery student, but I remember a vid I saw way back that reminds me of you and what your portraying on this forum. The video was a Q&A, and Mystery was saying some people were asking him about how to get pumped before a party, like if he listened to certain music or worked out. His answer was simple: it's a fuckin party, if you're not pumped just for the party you may as well not go.

I'm gonna try to help you with one of my party game tips:

1. HAVE FUN! Your priority in a party should be to have fun. You said it yourself, you can talk to other dudes and girls with boyfriends without any problem. The problem is that when you talk to single girls you set imaginary goals, like phone number of fail, or its kiss close or fail. Then the moment things go bad you get irritated and that negativity escalates. It happened to me. Your goal when you go out should be to have fun, hell second goal should be to meet new people. If you stop putting pressure on yourself to close, closing becomes easier.

Eh, it happens at parties a lot. Great that you got IOIs from other girls, nuture them and get some #closes.

I don't think this necessarily means you should give up hope on this girl. She's still in your class, approach her.

A few things that have worked for me when I've picked up girls from class (the key is always the ice breaker):

- In large lecture halls, when the teachers being boring, I found its great to just draw a tic tac toe board in the corner of the girl next to me's paper. It always brings a smile and its very easy to escalate that into passing notes/#close.
- Directly after class, comment on something she said in class. This works well for those discussion esq classes. A neg is great too, but make sure its in a joking tone.. for ex. "I hate how you group healthcare/environmental issues. A republican can be an environmentalist!" could turn you into an enemy if you don't say it jokingly.
- Use the class. Exam coming up? Give her a 'are you gonna fail this next exam as bad as I am?' or 'I can't believe other people think this class is hard' etc.

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