I have discovered that many newcomers to the forums and to the Game often times worry about openers more than anything.
"I need help with finding an opener to get my oneitis to bed!" Ever heard that question before?
I have a theory that in the very beginning of newcomer's gaming career, their mind tricks them into thinking the opener is like a pickup-line, and if it is good enough, he'll get his target home and into bed. Experience will prove them wrong.
Fact of the matter is that it doesn't really matter what you open a set with.
If your opener is terrible, but your overall game is good, you can get the girl.
On the flipside, when people go out to sarge, armed with nothing but a "perfect opener", you'll get stuck once you've executed that opener! The opener won't get you the girl!
Imagine that you are a door-to-door salesman. The opener is really like a doorbell. Ding-dong, she opens the door and that's as far as the opener takes you. After that it's up to you to sell your product.
Or
The Opener is like an Ice-Breaker. Once you've broken the Ice, you've gotta know how to swim, or else you'll drown.
What people seem to miss out on, is that the opener has one sole purpose: to get the target into conversation. Once you've got her in conversation, where do you go from there?
The opener usually take less then one minute. One minute. A man with tight Game spend an average of 4-7 hours of getting the woman into bed. The experienced Gamer does NOT spend that time going over his canned openers.
The sooner freshmen to the Game realize this, the Game is on.
I think that when people with little experience start sarging, their biggest sticking point is usually approach anxiety. They feel that if they don't have a great opener, they'll be blown off.
This can have something to do with previous bad experiences with "Pick-up lines". AFC's think they'll get the woman into bed by telling a pick-up line, buying her a drink, perhaps tell a joke, and they think the woman is ready to go! After years of this, they realize this isn't the case.
In desperation they find the pick-up community. Now, when new Gamers go sarging with their newfound skills and their cheat-sheets, they have to open the set.
This is where the Opener comes into play. The opener is in fact the newcomers first meeting with the Game. The Approach anxiety is telling them that the opener they want to use isn't good enough, their head constantly tell them they'll get blown off, because it isn't the "right one".
What happen when they finally enter the set?
They might execute their opener perfectly. Now what? Silence.. They never thought of what to do after opening the set. Then they get blown off.
When they come home, they blame the Opener for not being good enough. They might log on here and ask, "Hey guys, I need an even better opener to get my oneitis to bed, the last one didn't work! "
Are they mistaking the opener for being a pick-up line?
Of course, I have been there and done this.
When I started out on Game, I went on a few parties trying out different openers, such as "Who lies more?" etc. Often times, I got stuck in the opener, and let it die out before I was eventually blown off.
Then, I figured that I needed to add False Time Constraints! That really only made me bounce the set once I finished my opener... I had the excuse to do so, right? Why overstay my welcome? Nah, that didn't help either.
It was only when I started focusing on overall game, such as my body language, inner Game, working on my storytelling and started grooming like a movie-star that I started seeing results.
My point here is that people spend too much time worrying about the Opener. Get out in the Game, get experience and realize - the Opener doesn't matter! You can open with practically anything! It is once you transition from the opener that the Game is on. That's when you build attraction and do your thing - you kino, banter, tease, move into comfort, move into seduction, close and whatnot, whatever your playstyle is like.
And don't ever blame the Opener if you get blown out. Then again,
Why do we fall? So that we can rise again!
Ride hard or stay home fellas
- Crüe
CHAT
