Hey mate you need to hang in there. First of all you I need to tell you that theres nothing wrong with you your just a victim of bad circumstance. If you want my honest opinion you need to give gaming a rest for a few weeks and take a step back to examine yourself theres no use looking at all this innergame and latest opener bollocks if you cant see the wood for the trees.
Now I don't know you so I can only make assumptions about you, but Its sounds that what you really need to do is work on your own confidence and self esteem. Judging by your post what you're thinking and feeling is very common and is a combination of what psychologists call all or nothing thinking and mis labeling. Your letting previous experiences and failures control your current state creating a self fulfilling prophecy. You believe because you havent been successful in the past you cant be sucsessful in the future which is a load of horse shit!
Basically you have had a serious of circumstances and events in your life to degrade your confidence and self esteem and develop negative behavioral patterns. which has led you to the opinion that you'll never be sucsessful with women, and until you correct these behavioral patterns no amount of gaming technique will help you need to give yourself a break and feel good about yourself.
Now the good news is that its not your fault you developed these negative behavioral patterns. And you can correct them! Now you may have had some major trauma to cause this but in most cases with people its a serious of very minor events that you have just been unlucky in that you reacted to them badly.
OK so heres what you can do about it! If you dont think its that serious theres a few books that can help and I posted a link to another thread by me. I have also posted a link to an Australian Website called mood Gym which is pretty good. THIS IS NON PUA STUFF Its just general self esteem and confidence building that once you got sorted will help your game a great deal. Now if you think its worse you might want to consider a thing called Cognative Behavioural Therapy theres several workshops and groups that can be attended or you can be reffered by your Doctor.
confidence-that-works-vt25215.html?highlight=
http://moodgym.anu.edu.au/welcome
Now I have a lot of experience helping people with stuff like this so if you want anymore advice dont hesitate in getting in contact with me.
Take it Easy Buddy!
Exile