So I'm leaving a longterm relationship to get back on the scene, but I noticed it's not quite like riding a bike.

After 2 years without practice, I fumbled into an opening with a clothing sales girl who was around a 7 who was giving me every IOI in the book. At one point I actually said, "So this is awkward, but I thought you were kinda cute, so I thought I would chat you up."

Needless to say this didn't end very ideally. She immediately responded with a "this is awkward but I live with my boyfriend in a nearby city." I salvaged the exit with a , "look I have no presumptions about where this is going, but I'm just trying to add people to my circle of friends because I'm new to the area. Here's my contact, if you want to drop me a line online."

I know that actually announcing "this is awkward, but..." was the deathknell of my intro. I could actually see her physically shrink away when I said that. My ability to converse is natural and flows, but I have no natural segue into letting them know I'm interested.

I'm out of transitions from small talk to "we should hang out." Do I need a pretense? I have other dating prospects, and it's easy to score with 5's-7's at places like OKCupid, but my free-game is suffering.

I exercise, look good, I'm fairly articulate, well educated, and get a lot of IOIs, but have no one-on-one game. I feel like I'm broadcasting that I want to fuck them, without ever saying that. All of my pickups are outside of clubs too. Any good natural transitions?

It happens to all of us. The best advice I've heard is that one should never stop practicing.

That being said, a good opener doesn't have to be really witty or charming. Just walk up to her and say, "Hi, my name is ____. How's it going?" and then either ask her a some inane question or use some lukewarm neg such as "I like your dress, it reminds me of how my sister dresses" or "I thought you looked cool, I wanted to see if your personality matches your looks".

Just remember to put yourself in your target's shoes. She's probably used to getting hit on, so if you just treat her like a good friend/little sister then she'll probably appreciate you for being human.

The most important rule to follow is that you want to make two statements per every question you ask. So bring up whatever you're interested in, or a movie you saw, book you read, etc. Some 'dead air' in a conversation is normal; not everyone is bursting with something to say, try to feel comfortable with some silence.

After you've been talking for a few minutes just use an easy transition like,

"I need to get back to what I was doing but you should give me your number so we can hang out sometime."

...however, if you can connect asking for the number with your opener with something like,

"Your personality is actually pretty cool. Let's go out on a date" or "You may dress like my sister but you're way cooler. Let's get a drink this weekend."

...then you get a million points and she'll probably think you're smart/witty.

Finally, a lot of PUAs claim that its better to ask for a number before the conversation ends. And in many cases its true. But often girls don't really give a shit. If you have a good rapport they're likely to say yes. But, of course, it's best to memorize some responses to common shit tests:

i.e.

-If a girl says she has a BF just shrug and say, "So?"
-Or if she says, "How about I take down your number instead?" just say,
"I don't give my number to strangers" or just raise your eyebrow and say, "Does that always work for you?"

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The ultimate lesson of psychoanalysis is that human life is never "just life": we are possessed by the strange drive to enjoy life in excess, attached to a surplus which derails the ordinary run of things.
-Slavoj Zizek

Actually, the deathknell was not adjusting your read of the IOIs based on the fact she is a hired gun. Keep working at it. Hired guns (yes, even a sales girl at a store is a hired gun) are some of the most difficult women to game. Work your way back up to that.

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http://www.joshsway.com -- dating, online dating, fitness, fashion, and more...