Hi guys,

I have been studying MM and other PUA for a few years already, back and forth and with lots of breaks. For some reason I have troubles with escalating and lost many good HB's.

The last HB I am going to lose is my collegue:
My collegue started as a trainee at my firm, which means she works three times a month at several departments and the end of the traineeship she will choose the department which she finds most interesting, to work.

So in September she worked a month at my department and the vibe was on the first day. Everytime when I was joking around, she was there. Laughing at my jokes and joking/fooling around. We had some good eye-contact. The month went quickly and she left my department for another department. I wanted to ask her out, but i didn't.

A month later, in October I saw her at the monthly friday drinks at work. We had a nice talk and suddenly she suggested that we should hang out sometimes, to keep in touch. SHe suggested to have lunch or have drinks, etc. Foolish me I suggested to have lunch.....So we had lunch in a crappy lunchroom (because this lunchroom was close to the office). The lunch was ok, no sparks/excitement. Kinda boring to be honest.
SHe suggested this place and she paid, so that I would have to pay the next time (her words!).

SO the second time, In November, I asked her out again for lunch in a 'funny email'. And she didn't respond. After a while I send a new email, that she should ignore my previous email and that I am still interested to have lunch with her. Now she reacted and went on having lunch with me. Although it was more fun than the first time, it was a very forgettable lunch..

After the lunch we didn't have any contact anymore, besides the usual 'good morning'. There is no excitement, attraction anymore.

So I am planning to send her an email, like "hey, let's have drinks instead of boring sandwiches, what do you think?". Hopefully I can still turn this in a good way.

My observations:
1. She asked me out, so she was interested;
2. Lunch was boring, so she was loosing interest;
3. I did not escalate, so she thinks I am not interested that way.

What do you advice me?

First thing to be successful is to accept the fact that it will be hard as fuck and you will have to fuck up before you succeed. It seems to me that the you're afraid of taking moves for the fear of loss. It's a natural reaction and it's ok to have. This feeling goes away when you have abundance of woman. Think about it, if you would have 20 beautiful woman in your phone book waiting to meet you would you be asking this question here. Probably not. So go out there and talk to more girls. As far as this girl. At first she was interested in you but it seems like you failed to make a move and as a result ended in the friendzone. So I advice you to totally block this girl out and go find some other girls, there are plenty of them.

_________________
"Experience is the teacher of all things"