Quote:
It is a fact that (almost) everyone has AA. Recently I found that I have been far more comfortable talking to strangers than I have ever been before and when I thought about why it seems obvious. I have just entered a couple of new friendship groups for a variety of reasons (sports teams/ friends leaving uni) but all of these circles that I joined I knew at least 1 or 2 people very well. This meant I would go along to social events and i would get introduced to people, I would end up standing next to someone and in this kind of environment it is easy to approach.
eg. at a party/ club where I know 1 or 2 people:
I end up stood next to a girl who i know is in the social circle but do not know at this event. At this point I will literally say 'Hi, Im ****, it's really nice here' (or some other completely menial comment). She then introduces herself, i will shake hands or (ideally) give her a kiss on the cheek (This is common in the UK). From this I would just say 'How do you know people here/ Who do you know here'. This then starts a long conversation of how you know everyone at the party (which will often involve stories in which people will be introduced to you) and very quickly you can have good raport with not just that one person but a lot of that group. An easy topic to talk about is trading stories about the friend(s) that you have in common with them, and will always provide laughing and opportunities to flirt.
I found that this way of meeting people was happening a lot because of my change in social group and because I was used to talking to strangers (in an environment where you are very unlikely to get shot down). And as such I was in general more confident with strangers as I was used to having this flirty banter with people I didn't know.
I know that my situation was relatively unique but wherever you go out with friends there's always going to be situations in which you don't know someone so take that opportunity to start conversation with someone who you know you have common ground with and you will find quite quickly you will just end up approaching people without realising you're doing it.
good post brother
this is kinda how I got rid of my anxiety to talk to women, you just kinda slowly desensitize yourself to it.
CHAT