Make sure you read this, it could dramatically increase the amount of results you are getting.
I constantly see guys get cock-blocked by the girl's friends, leave without a girl who is interested in him or she leaves without him, or an overall failure to convert interest into sex because of the dynamics of the group she is at the venue with, and the most common girls dragging their friend away.
Even the guys who are 'good' I see fail to manage the group dynamics well, and this costs them in the field. There is so much pickup stuff written on attracting girls, conversation, having girls wanting to fuck you, but this is only part of what is required to take girls home, in fact this is often the easy part. Guys can get frustrated because meeting a girl and her wanting to fuck you does not mean you are golden, there are other obstacles to overcome.
It's not secret the majority of guys who get same night lays, and pickup do so from a 2-set (2 girls together). Not only are 2-sets the easiest to game (they are your bread and butter as a PUA), but logistics are fairly easy. At the very minimum one of the 2-set wants to pickup, why else would two girls go out together? At the best both do, but you encounter much less group dynamics problems when its just two girls.
But when the group is three or more people, this is where you need to get smart, and this is where most people fail. And unfortunately the hottest girls are not generally in 2-sets, they are part of bigger groups, so its a necessary evil.
It happened to one of my friends on Friday night. A group of 3 girls, one is completely into him. She is all over him at the bar, arms around his neck. He takes her upstairs in the club for a make-out session. She wants to fuck him so bad. The problem? Her friends are not so keen on the idea. He's fucked. Classic female friends cockblock. He gets a 'phone number'.
The best way to teach this is to give a couple of examples and then explain the theory behind it, and a step-by-step action plan.
So it's last night and been encouraging my friends to approach, give feedback, and tweaking their game. It's time for me to do my thing. I'm on the dancefloor, loving the Ivy tunes, and having more fun than anyone else it seems. My smile is an advantage at 2:00am when all the other guys are unhappy and frustrated. I see a guy hitting on a girl, and doing a bad job, so I begin teasing her about it. (I do love dance floor game)
I'm kind of pointing a little bit and laughing subtly, and while not being too obvious, because this guy is mid-pickup, my facial expressions are kind of like 'ha ha you are being picked up by some idiot', kind of making fun of her. This makes her want to fuck me it appears. And she wants me to blow the guy off, and I won't because its too entertaining seeing her being hit-on by a guy trying to bribe her with Moet. She jokes that he is hitting on me, maybe he is trying some amog tricks.
What does stand out to me as clear as crystal is her friend who is in a bad mood. She is damn grumpy. Arms folded, an upside down smile. This guy manages to get her off the dance floor. The friend follows, unhappily. I wait, then follow. They are at the bar, and I stand a few metres away, and laugh a little, and the girl ditches the guy, and hardcore escalates on me.
He did try some amog stuff on me, some stuff to blow me off, but this is my arena. Anyway, the friend, storms off towards the front door on her own. So I've got this girl all over me, and her friend is walking off. The best thing is that my friends are seeing everything go down. Picture perfect pickup, I mean, take a girl off a guy, flipping the script (she's picking me up), its visually appealing. But I know this is all not worth shit unless I take care of the friend, and the rest of the group if there is one. So I go after the friend, with my girl in tow.
I get near the door, and the friend is standing there, looking unhappy. I engage her, and do my best to make friends. She opens up a little. My girl is still hitting on me, so I'm juggling between teasing her about the lame guy, and getting the friend into a good mood. I ask her for advice about the friend, why is she in a bad mood, what can I do to make her happy. So compare the situations. With my student on the first night the girl's friends were almost enemies for his pickup. And I am looking to make her friends my allies. I mean, I want their support to me picking up their friend, if I get this, I am golden.
She recommends saying 'happy birthday.' So I do it, and the friend is stoked. I chat with her for a bit about birthdays, and about her night, and make a real effort. It really pays off, she is smiling, and giving me full approval to close the friend. My lair friends are only a few metres away and its cool that after the first night I was talking about group dynamics, that they are seeing me take control of them. Guys are generally surprised when they see how much of an effort I make to meet the entire group and have them supporting my pickup.
Next a guy joins these two girls. I immediately introduce myself, and make friends with him. Chat with him and all while keeping things moving with my girl. Make him feel at ease, have him feel good, and he really likes me. They want me to leave with them, but I'm on work time, so I settle for a number. I get two texts from her, one at 3am, and 4am, and we know what text messages at that time mean. Before they leave the guy in the group makes a special effort to shake my hand and gives me a nod of approval like I did a good job.
I never see guys in the field make such an effort to get the friends on your team!
As the girl leaves my arm another girl grabs me and pulls me in. Never seen her before, but I'll roll with it. She begins running game on me. Friends still 2 metres away. Hey I'm 2-0, 2 approaches for the night, and 2 successes (not real successes because I didn't fuck them, but I couldn't have fucked them in a coma) if you call the last one an approach, cause she approached me. She's young, hot, blonde, and keen. I do my thing. I make sure to meet her group. Although it could be 3-0 if you count the girl while walking into the venue who was right to go quickly, but I kind of forget about that because it was hours ago.
I must say strike rate seems to be my thing, that separates me from the masses of pickup guys, but thinking in terms of it is something I don't recommend at all because it will fuck you up. It does make you a bit outcome dependent. It's good to be different in some way.
So, she is with 2 guys and a girl. I'm friendly, meet them, make friends, and when meeting the guys (2 young uni guys who are the classic nice guys) ensure to be friendly but assert a little dominance, and they submit. Nice guys. They stand back, and let me do my thing. I take control of the group, and it rocks. I move her into isolation, and the interaction continues.
So how do you do it?
Through my being severely burnt so many times for failing to take care of group dynamics this is super important to me. It you are passive, fail to take initiative, it will bite you every time.
Step 1
Meet the friends.
Make sure you take the lead to meet her friends. Get their names, understand how they know each other, make the friends feel good, make them feel safe, and have them like you. Make a real effort to get the friends on-side. This is not a technique, I like people. Meet the entire group, and spend time with them.
Take note of the dynamics, who is the leader of the group, the guys, who is happy who isn't, who is happy for you, who is against you. Keep her close, be touching her, but spend as much time as is required to get all the friends on-side. Often when you do, they'll just let you do your thing. Take the initiative with girls who seem to want to cockblock you, and get in advance. Don't try and turn it around when they are dragging them out the door.
Don't be a guy who complains about the cock blocking friends. It is your responsibility to handle that stuff. If there are guys, make sure to be friendly, but have them have a feeling of 'don't fuck with you'.
This step cannot be underestimated. Fail to do it at your peril.
Step 2
Get a hold on the logistics.
Understand the reason for them coming out (is it a girl's night out, or a birthday party etc), without being creepy or weird figure out any special travel arrangements, where the group is segmented with mini-groups, her freedom for leaving her group or who you would have to bring with you, any potential cock blocks, and any commitments she has to certain people, and so on.
I'm really getting in in advance before any surprise problems arise. My mindset is that I will fuck her so long as I handle all the logistical issues. And there will almost always be logistical issues. You want to take the initiative and not be doing pickup blindly and hoping for the best. Hope is not a strategy. She may be the driver for everyone else, everyone may be staying at her house, or she may have driven there alone and be free as a bird, there are unlimited possibilities of the different logistics.
I've brought groups of people back to my house, I taken the leadership position immediately with groups of guys and girls I've just met and taken them to a different club, and I've taken single girls from their group with no problems. I aim to take an extremely flexible approach, and work with any scenario. Try not to have a set plan, you'll fail every time. You've got to be prepared for the unexpected, but anything is workable.
More than anything I'd rather you take a risk than be passive. You are better off failing while taking charge, taking a chance, being aggressive, than being reactive, being passive or waiting to see if things turn out for you. For me this is the elegant part of pickup. Sure I've got the girl, that was a walk in the park, the fun part is managing the group, and the logistics. I'll always want a guy to give his best shot to have the group love him, and be creative with figuring out the logistics, than simply not having logistics handed to him on a platter and he complains about it.
Last night I took a leadership position in both groups, where not only the girl I met was following me, but also all her friends. This is a great spot to be in. You'd be surprised at how much people want to be led, and how they like a guy who does it properly. Most people in groups are sheep, you'll get a couple alphas here and there, and some cockblocks, but on the whole people will be open to your lead. I dopn't try to lead for too long though, I really do want to get her away from her group if possible, but its all about preventing any resistance to that happening, and whether by authority or likability, addressing potential problems before they happen.
Step 3
Take your opportunities when they are there.
You've got to be good at pulling the trigger when its there to take. I find that because of group distractions you've sometimes got a smaller window of opportunity to actually do something when you have the ability to do so. If you wait, dick around, or generally wimp out, the window will close.
It's a balance, manage the group dynamics, figure out the logistics, while escalating.
I aim to avoid the rubber band effect where you escalate and then she is pulled back towards her group, or you get to maximum escalation in public, and then it pulls back to being a normal conversation. You want your escalation to keep progressing, and moving forwards, and always be on the up, even if its just small little steps.
Don't be afraid to leave with a girl after 3 or 5 minutes if it's on. Be ready to escalate quickly if the opportunity is there, and don't feel like you need to do all this conversation if you don't need to, that will simply lessen sexual tension. When a girl is part of a group and other members of the group are hooking up, or having fun, or in couples, her buying temperature may be sky high, and you'll be in the right place at the right time. If you feel the need to run your 30 minutes of material you'll certainly miss the train.
Because of the increased social pressure, and the other group factors, you may need to get into isolation quickly. In my experience women are ready to go much quicker than men. Women are on often from the initial approach, and men are thinking they need to do all this stuff first. And then they fuck it up. If its there, take it.
Step 4
Practice.
Group dynamics take time to master.
I'm seeing a trend lately where guys give up too easily when learning new things. The thing that mostly separates community guys from normal guys is our threshold for practicing thing, meeting decent amounts of women and handling what is commonly called 'rejection'.
Our ability to meet hundreds of women and not put too much expectation on what happens is what makes us different. Now I'm not a fan of approaching 10,000 women, because if it takes that much then you are doing something completely wrong or have no awareness at all, but guys you'll meet on the street will give up so much faster than us.
I've had guys give up on being good with women after just a few blow-outs and a couple of weeks. You really do need a threshold of accepting the learning process, giving it time, and staying positive even when the world doesn't seem to be liking you.
Mastering group dynamics will especially be something you need to chill with because meeting women and having them want to fuck you and then being cock blocked or flaked on really sucks. You need to accept it as part of the learning process, and have a high tolerance for nearly getting sex and having it blow up in your face.
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